This quote was sent in anonymously, sorry it took me a little while to see your ask, tumblr never seems to notify me when I get them but thank you very much for sending it in! 😊

-----------

Y/N: police wants me to testify because I witnessed an accident today.

Kaz: Yeah? Were you close?

Y/N: ...Yeah.

Kaz: How close?

Y/N: ...

Kaz: Y/N.

Y/N: I caused it.

Y/N: I'm sorry, Kaz. It's all my fault

Kaz: No. No, that's not true.

Kaz: It's Jespers fault as well.

Jesper: Hey!

Y/N: Matthias, stop trying to bribe me with snacks.

Matthias: Why? Is it working?

Y/N: Of course it's working!

Y/N: What if I pour coffee in my cereal instead of milk?

Matthias: *Taking the coffee pot as he walks by* What if you don’t.

Jesper: *Is ill in bed* I'm dying.

Y/N: No you're not, it's just a bug stop being such a drama queen.

Y/N: *Feels Jesper's forehead* Wow, okay you really are warm.

Jesper: You could almost say I'm ho-

Y/N: *Whacks him with a pillow*

Kaz: All right. It's not on the floor, so whichever one of you accidentally took it-

Little Y/N: Not accidentally! Everyone knows it's mine.

Kaz: ...Whoever insidiously and with great malice aforethought abducted Y/N's favourite toy, confess, repent and relinquish so we can leave.

Y/N: Please tell me we can stop it.

Wylan: If we can't, we're at the center of the blast radius so we won't feel a thing.

Jesper: Well, that's comforting.

Nikolai: Come on, have a little faith. With a dashing hero like me on the case, how can we fail?

Y/N: He is dashing, you have to give him that.

*Y/N meeting The Crows for the first time*

Jesper: I can’t believe you just walked up and talked to Kaz without getting so much as a glare! Most people can’t even look in his general direction without some kind of threat.

Y/N: I mean it would be a little weird if I couldn’t. We are engaged after all.

Jesper: ...I'm sorry, you're what?!

Kaz: You seem very nice.

Y/N: Thank you.

Kaz: I have no room in my life for people like that.

Jesper: *Comes up with an elaborate plan to escape a locked room*

Jesper: *To Wylan* I'll tell you what, I am incredibly clever.

Y/N: *Opens the door*

Jesper: ...How did you do that?

Y/N: It wasn't locked.

Jesper:

Wylan:

Y/N: Neither of you thought to try the door?

Jesper: It was supposed to be locked.

Y/N: Are you saying you like me, or not?

Kaz: Are you saying you like me, or not?

Y/N: I’m saying I like you!

Kaz: Well, then I’m saying I like you!

Y/N: Then I guess we’re together!

Kaz: Fine!

Y/N: Fine!

*The Crows always use Y/N/N and never their full name*

Jesper: I’m gonna mess with them and call them Y/N.

Y/N: *Entering the room*

Jesper: Y/N.

Y/N: *Freezes*

Jesper: Y/N?

Y/N: Are you mad at me?

Jesper: Oh damn- No, no, I’m sorry, Y/N/N. Come here. *Hugs them*

Kaz: Venom no doubt. Delivered straight from the fangs of the deadly coastal taipan.

Y/N: How can you tell?

Kaz: There's one right behind your foot.

Y/N: What?! What do I do?

Kaz: I'd start with staying very still and not getting bitten.

Y/N: Why didn't you tell me?

Kaz: It was a personal issue.

Y/N: You being in love with me kind of also involves me.

Y/N: Short jokes have never been funny nor will they ever be.

Kaz: Agreed. I can't believe people would stoop so low.

Y/N:

Y/N: You're an arsehole.

Jesper: This is so boring. I would honestly rather sit around and listen to you talk about the right way to make an embroidery stitch.

Y/N: There’s more than one right way to make an embroidery stitch, Jesper. There are OVER THIRTY right ways! You’ve got backstitches, backtacks-

Jesper: Wait, stop. I’ve made a terrible mistake.

Y/N: Guys, do you think I'm a badass?

Kaz: Sure.

Jesper: No, I think your ass is great.

Everyone:

Jesper: I'm sorry, what was the question again?