he gives me courage;

how was this monologue real

*EDIT: finn confirmed at a recent convention that mike had no romantic feelings when he first met el in the woods (he was only 12 years old, extremely worried about his best friend and did not have romance on his mind… he even compared finding el to finding E.T.) so the “love at first sight” trope is nonsense

like, okay, i'm sure this scene has been talked about and dissected to pieces already in this fandom but. BUT. i need to put my two cents in or i will explode.

so, your lord and best friend has just admitted to you that if you die, he will be so beside himself with grief that he might just die too.

the game then gives you THIS option in response.

and you, the player, know how video games work. you know this is the press x for romance button. you expect henry to admit his feelings—a culmination of all the hints he's dropped from the heart options we've chosen before—and kiss him as soon as the button's been pressed.

except henry doesn't kiss hans.

instead, henry places his hand on hans' hand. it's the first moment of physical contact between them in the whole scene...but it's not a kiss. it's gentle. it's intimate. it's tiptoeing the line between comforting a friend and something more...

...but henry leaves it at that. and he gets up and goes to leave.

and in that moment of panic. in that split second of 'this might be the last time i'll ever see you again, please don't go' — it's hans that kisses henry.

and it's henry who pushes hans away.

this is—for all intents and purposes—the opposite of what we, the player, chose.

and to add insult to injury, henry looks conflicted.

he looks SO conflicted that hans believes he's fucked up royally.

that he has completely tarnished their final moments together by acting on impulse—by giving into temptation and desperation and feelings he can't even put into his own words—and henry must be disgusted by him.

and hans believes this because he watches henry turn his back to him. refusing to look at him. and head for the door.

but henry stops before he opens it. and i keep thinking back to the heart option we chose.

the player is not making the choice for henry to kiss hans. we are not forcing his hand.

the player is reminding henry what he's been telling himself throughout the entire game.

don't run away, henry.

kiss him. kiss him back.

so henry does.

"We cut the night

We're random bullets, love

Shot by some drunken god

Guilty only, of growing old."

Kept listening to this again and again.

how it started // how it's going

i've cried over will so many times ever since the show started all the way back in 2016 because he's suffered from the very beginning and it absolutely breaks my heart knowing that he's barely had any happy moments in his life. and it’s not just because he’s my favourite character and comfort character and i relate to him so much, but also because he’s the most kind, loving, strong and selfless person on this entire show and it hurts so bad knowing he’s never truly been happy.

he was abused and bullied as a child by his own father and school bullies. his family has always struggled financially and is looked down upon by other people in town. he suffers from anxiety. he has been struggling with his sexuality in a time where being gay isn’t accepted. he’s in love with his best friend. he got kidnapped and taken to an alternate dimension, resulting in more ptsd. he comes back and finds out the boy he’s in love with has eyes for the girl that opened the gate to the upside down that resulted in his kidnapping in the first place. he gets possessed by the mindflayer and suffers physically and mentally. his body was burning, his brain was being affected, the mindflayer was literally taking over him. he was willing to sacrifice his own life to put an end to it all. summer comes around and everyone is happy in their relationships and experiencing romance while will is alone. he just wants to play d&d because it’s an escape and distraction from the real world and he’s been through so much trauma. no one wants to play or spend time with him so he gets excluded. he has to watch the boy he’s in love with obsess over his girlfriend and it hurts so bad. he gets told that everyone is growing up and getting girlfriends and feels even more left out and isolated when he hears the words “it’s not my fault you don’t like girls”. he destroys castle byers, his hiding spot and safe place, and rips up his photographs and artwork because he feels so alone and different. he has to leave his best friend and the boy he’s in love with even though they’ve been by each other’s side since they were 4 years old. he gets asked if he’ll join another party and he says “not possible”, because he could never move on from him. he keeps his promise and creates a beautiful painting for the boy he loves most of something that’s incredibly special to them; their d&d party. he’s excited to finally reunite with him because they lost contact and he misses him so much. he goes in for a hug but is met with a awkward shoulder touch instead. imagine how horrible and embarrassing it would feel to have a hug rejected by the person you love most and just wanted to hold again. he’s excluded again and has to watch him with his girlfriend. they don’t talk to him or include him on their date. it’s like he doesn’t even matter. he gets told he’s being an asshole for looking sad and then confronts mike for not contacting him enough. he gets apologised to shortly after and feels a moment of happiness but it’s still sad because he doesn’t know what to do about his feelings. he sits with mike on top of a car and explains why it’s so hard to open up to the people you care about most in case they don’t like the truth. he knows he can’t confess his feelings for many reasons; the boy he loves is currently in a relationship and being gay wasn’t accepted so he doesn’t know how people will react. it’s devastating and terrifying. will ends up showing him his painting that he worked so hard on and his face lights up when he sees it. this makes the next part even more painful. will lies and says it was commissioned by his girlfriend and then confesses his love for mike, but he uses eleven’s name to disguise it. he pours his heart out and makes mike so happy. will needs mike the same way mike wants to be needed. they both need each other and they don’t even realise it yet. will calls mike “the heart”, because he’s his heart. mike has always been will’s safe place and comfort. when he saw that mike was upset in the car, he did whatever he could to make him happy. will inspired him, gave him motivation and made him smile. this entire scene shows us how selfless and loving will is. it’s beautiful but heartbreaking. will loves mike so much that he did what he had to in order to make him happy even if that meant sacrificing his own feelings and hiding the truth. then he had to watch mike confess to his girlfriend even though the monologue was filled with lies and mike copied will’s words since will is the one that made him say it in the first place.

will byers deserves to be happy. he has to get his happy ending. they can’t put him through any more pain. and regardless of what anyone says, i think he deserves to end up with the boy he loves most that he’s known for almost his entire life because that would make him the happiest. they belong together and they make each other feel safe. they bring out the best in each other. they can actually be themselves with each other. they both make each other feel worth something. will also told mike that he’s never felt like a mistake because of him. he isn’t just a “crush” to will, he’s the love of his life. they make each other the happiest and i just want to see them happy.

"Everything will be alright. I promise you." [WIP] ⚔️

—

Thinking about what they might have talked about before Henry left. After the battle, he thanked Hans for the 'encouragement' - I'd like to think that Henry needed those words just the same.

I really have a bone to pick with anyone saying that El has to end up with Mike by the end of the show. Poor girl doesn't feel emotionally secure in that relationship. We start season 4 with her lying to Mike and pretending to be "normal" and well-adjusted. This isn't a good sign. Mike did make her feel loved from the beginning, he helped her reframe the way she sees herself - from "a monster" into "a superhero". It did help, until things got too complicated, and she lost the "superhero" part. She basically put all of her self-worth onto that title and now with it suddenly gone, she doesn't know who she is. She feels insecure and seeks validation from her boyfriend, but she doesn't find it there. Mike has his own problems he's dealing with. Mike himself is very insecure in that relationship. Who can even blame her for feeling like Mike doesn't love her because of who she is?

The whole point of her emotional journey in season 4 is to realize that she doesn't need external validation to feel empowered. She's not a monster she thinks she is, but someone who was abused by a monster. Now that she has her powers back, she can be a superhero again, but it doesn't have to define her as a person. She also can be El. If my reading is correct, I see her initiating the breakup.

At this point, both of them are miserable in the relationship. Mike wants to continue with his saviour complex shenanigans and idolization, while she wants to be seen as "normal" and equal.

Now, Mike and Will? Their dynamic works. They can be vulnerable with each other, they feel equal. Mike coddles Will all the time, but Will actually appreciates that from him. Some people just want to be loved differently.

Luke Dale gets to the first romance line!!!!

Poor man, going on 8+ hours now... Keep strong, milord