The puzzle I can't solve; The trinket I can't fix

Hello hello :3

I am Vela and welcome to this infinitesimal corner of the world. Most people are welcomed here with open arms, only people who aren't welcome are fascists of all sorts.

I guess I might share writing and haiku. I'm mostly in a venting sort of way right now because life is kicking my ass.

Well... That's all for an intro post methinks?

I can't help but keep procrastinating because this is so fucking scary. I can't deny that this is what I want, but doing it alone is so scary

I'm trying to start hrt because I feel like if I don't do it now I won't be able to ever again. I just hate doing things alone, but I have no other choice right now. There's no hand for me to hold, no one offering to talk to me as I go through it, no comforting presence by my side.

I just need to do it. Sadly I think it's too late in the day to try today, but I think writing this post has helped. This makes me feel less alone in the world, I probably shouldn't post this but I think I'd feel better knowing anyone knows I'm struggling. I feel like I'm going to do this.

The creature. I saw it while I was making dinner. If only I wasn't deathly allergic :(

I constantly tell myself to not make decision while I'm super emotional and in my feelings. But what's the alternative? I try to solve everything like a puzzle?

No thanks! I'm going to try to balance this shit (and probably fail) but I have something I'm going to do tomorrow

Iron Lung has a pretty good soundtrack such as... the hull of your submarine breaking under the pressure of the ocean

I am slightly obsessed with the idea of getting tattoos again. I think I'd only really get them on my arms and maybe my legs, but I have ideas

Holiday and Boulevard of Broken Dreams really just go together. I don't like listening to 1 without the other.

I think having more scars on my hands and arms would be cool. Like all of the seared flesh and small cuts have healed and most of the hair on my hands has grown back, but I can still feel them there

I'm not saying I'll make them, but it'd certainly look cool. I feel like I've earned a physical representation of how I feel... oh my god that's what tattoos are for

woke up from a nap. No weird dreams today sadly.

I need plate armor to make a comeback. Like I also need to be able to look like a knight or medieval noble without spending 500 dollars on clothes for just 1 outfit

this actually bothers me so much

yall are going to see a lot more mistakes from me make it through

WAIT!!

WHERE'S THE EDIT BUTTON THAT HAS SAVED MY ASS SO MUCH

Nothing some epic music can't do for my creativity!

Prime example of this is Archangel by Two Steps From Hell, I actually put this on regularly because it's just so epic

I will not trust a single one of you after midnight.

I just had the most vivid dream of several things

the best bowl of spaghetti I've ever (not) had, a funny joke between two people who are not myself that I somehow find really funny, and something about walking into the center of a lake

The sauce of the spaghetti was just sort of spicy and had freshly grated parmesan in it and it was a tad sweet to compliment the spice.

Also the joke was literally just about 2 guys who are friends and accidentally worked on the same project like for audio or something, dream is fading fast, and the joke was one dude did like a lot of really inconsequential sounds and the other guy was was like the voice of a rude npc or something and after having like a "oh! you worked on that too! What'd you do?" and laughing at each other, they were like "Jonn and Ray, the sound guys" in the most unenthusiastic voices.