That Queer Librarian

pope francis died... on another, completely unrelated note, has anyone checked on how trisha paytas’s third pregnancy is going?

So Pope Francis met with JD Vance on Easter Sunday, giving another go at explaining compassion to him, then dies the following day

Im not saying these two things are connected, but if I was writing this book people would be criticizing me for hitting them over the head with obvious symbolism.

getting a “pope francis has died” notification from my news app while reading a smutty conclave fic was one of the most surreal moments of my life.

He died the day after Easter. The cuntiest since Jesus Christ

Cinematic parallels

House would treat two gay patients like shit and get sued for being homophobic and cuddy would go "he's not homophobic, he treats everyone like that!" which does not hold up in court so instead he's like how can I be homophobic when I have a boyfriend? Wilson stand up. Everyone would turn to Wilson (who had ZERO warning about this) and he'd stutter before glaring at House and stand "yes, House is unfortunately my boyfriend"

Then they'd walk out of the courtroom and Wilson would chew him out which House ignores. Cue 3 days layer when Wilson says House needs to clear up they lied about being gay to get him off (ha) and they're not actually dating because he is NOT getting any dates like this. House would walk into the hospital cafeteria and yell "ATTENTION EVERYONE. Doctor Wilson is not my boyfriend." Wilson would nod for 2 seconds before House follows up with "because we're engaged!" and Wilson can't even be mad because why did he think for 2 seconds that House would make it easy for him

House would try to use this as an opportunity to demand less clinic hours (think of it as a wedding gift) which he does not get because Cuddy knows exactly what's going on and she thinks it's hilarious but she needs his ass working

Cuddy: yeah? You two are a thing? How big is he?

House: 5.3 inches

Wilson: how the FUCK do you know that

if house was a drag queen his name could be ms.diagnosis

I feel like if Hanahaki disease was real in the House MD universe there’d be a whole episode about them treating a patient with it and they like lie or some shit about not telling so and so about their love or like the person they love is dead or something and so they try to cure them another way and the whole time House is like being a dick as always and making fun of them for it and like haha you won’t tell them you love them loser and then at the end of the episode the person the patient loves comes in at the last minute when the patient is on the brink of death and they confess and so the patient lives and gets a happy ending but then Wilson talks to House and says something like “the lengths people would go to to avoid rejection” and House would respond like “yeah these idiots would risk their lives just to not get their stupid feelings hurt” and then Wilson leaves and literally right after he’s gone House coughs up a few petals and barely reacts and just throws them into the trash or a fireplace or something and walks out into the hallway and the episode ends and it’s literally never brought up again

canon mlm rep be like "i like a boy..but im!?!? also a boy!? >-<??" meanwhile queerbaiting "if you die i'm alone".

when the mouse bites start kicking in

Forgot I made this in a dazed state last night and got jump scared by it in my drafts

DIMITRI MENTION??

I say as they drag me away to my padded cell.

it’s me and my intense love for my oc’s against the world 😞🙏

House and Jonathan Crane together in the same picture is like.... Pic perfection.

Mean Girls (2004) House MD (2009)

just started watching house and I thought yall were exaggerating but no. every episode is just like three wrong diagnoses that almost kill the patient and then house is like "he has underwater skunk herpes" and they give the guy a new butthole and he's cured. and then house chugs vicodin while talking about wanting to rail wilson.