good morning and happy is it really tuesday tuesday

@emsails YOU'RE RIGHT AND YOU SHOULD SAY IT

Please, I'm tired of seeing white/grey boxes

BOSS MAKES A DOLLAR

I MAKE A DIME

THATS WHY I MAKE MEADE

OUTTA THE COMPANY SLIME

BOSS MAKES A DOLLAR

I MAKE A DIME

THATS WHY I STEAL HONEY

TWO ATTA TIME

BOSS MAKES A DOLLAR

I MAKE A CENT

THATS WHY I TAKE HONEY PACKETS,

BOTTLE, AND FERMENT

BOSS MAKES A DOLLAR

I DONT MAKE JACK

EXCEPT FOR THE MEAD

#MEDIEVAL LIFE HACKS

ooo…. lady gagita

why the hell did they write it this way

Do not ask for whom the pussy willow pops. It pops for thee

“I know a place” and I take you to Lowe’s self check out to watch Saw (2004)

moment of unspeakable beauty today when one of my coworkers called another coworker "judas" for not splitting a can of white monster with her, and i got to watch the guy who sits next to me open a new google tab, type in "jeudis," and say quietly to himself "french thursday...?"

this could be the snart of something big

this could be the snort of something pig

I made him into a pin

I LOVE him!!! I hope he serves you well on your travels

Why is there no man arching his back with his butt in the air emoji

back in my day we just typed orz to make a little stick figure man doing that (or we would type or2 to give him a dumptruck). And we LIKED it that way!

Taking notes 📝

As I grow older I feel my capacity to understand that Miss Piggy is not a real person reached a peak in my adolescence and is now on a steady decline. I watched a Wendy Williams interview and there's this part that's like "can we get a ring cam!" and Miss Piggy shows her bling and I'm just like fuck she's so iconic. Miss Piggy who are you wearing? Miss Piggy have you ever considered running for office??

Like literally every time I see Miss Piggy there's a period where I need to readjust to the fact that it's not a person, and I feel that period is getting longer and longer with every instance

now all my Youtube recommendations are filled with Miss Piggy interviews. I’m not complaining. Miss Piggy what’s your secret to ageing so graciously

It's not just the audience; professional journalists, hosts, and actors report it is legitimately difficult to not see the Muppet as a person, and it is, in fact, incredibly easy to interview or act with them once the performer gets properly set up.

Like that one time they couldn't figure out why Kermit's audio was so garbage... then realized they'd put the mic on him instead of the performer.

this has been a very longstanding issue - before the muppet show was even a thing some muppets appeared in commercials, such as rolf the dog they had a continual problem where when people directing/shooting the dogfood commercial would give dirrection to rolf that they would be speaking to the muppet, to which rolf REPEATEDLY had to tell them ‘i cant hear you, you have to talk to him’ and point at the performer underneath him rolf is one of the most embarrassing muppets to need this direction as the performer is this, damn, obvious when not on camera

‘sir, i am a bathroom mat, the man you need to talk to is back there’

I did an interview with Gonzo one time, and when I got into the Zoom call, it was the actor on screen trying to figure out his audio. And then once he did, he went like “OKAY!” and then just like dove to the floor and it was Gonzo and there was never a moment when I doubted that the dude was just Gonzo’s tech guy 

I have met a muppet-like puppet in real life and when I tell you that my brain was hacked FUCKING INSTANTLY..... It was a person, I swear it was a person. I asked it for a hug (no i was not 5 years old, i was like 28 at this time). i genuinely don't know what came over me, it was just. It was a person???? Witchcraft

A couple years ago, I was invited to the birthday party of one of my former preschool students. I decided to bring my teaching puppet (a big rat) along because I knew several other kids from that class would be there, and she was always a huge hit with them.

They were, of course, very excited to see her. But what surprised me was that after the kids ran off to play in the sprinkler, the parents around me struck up conversation with the puppet. They continued for at least fifteen minutes, asking her questions like, "how long have you been teaching?" and "eaten out of any good dumpsters lately?" until one dad exclaimed "why have I been talking to a rat puppet this whole time!"

There's a guy who comes to the Denver Museum of Nature and Science with life size Skeleton puppets of mammoth/young T-Rex that he wears. You can fully see him in the middle of the skeleton, and it's a SKELETON, but absolutely everyone interacts with the puppets like they're living, breathing animals. I watched multiple people attempt to feed pretzels to the baby rex.

Girl when I tell you my life flashed before my eyes

The site is '12ft Ladder' found here:

Reblogging this on ALL my blogs because holy shit is it useful

???

finally misogyny for men 😻

"Adulting" is such a juvenile word we should give it a more dignified suffix. How about "Adultery"

thinking about that one wordless calvin and hobbes sunday strip thats just calvins dad ditching his work to go play in the snow... its going to make me cry

ohhhh my god

”#I LOVE that the comic keeps the lens on Calvin’s dad to the degree of not even showing Calvin’s excited face when his dad surprises him, #You can see the joy and excitement of the moment in his pose and reflected in his dad’s expression, #it’s a great little artistic decision, #I realized what gets me about it it’s the hat covering his dad’s head and hair so the dad just looks like Calvin. #you don’t HAVE to show Calvin! You already see him in the dad becoming a kid for a moment you only have to draw that once”