Everyday Sunshine

It’s in the foods we eat. Chopping vegetables with tender care. Adding spices for health. Nourishing our bodies and those of our loved ones. It’s in the small victory of being able to breathe deeply. It’s in the feel of the green grass on our bare feet. Connecting to this, our home, our planet. It’s in the fleeting smile and laughter of those around us. Connecting to joy that comes less and less these days. It’s in a warm strong hug. Feeling enveloped and comforted. It’s in the smell of flowers, of backyard fires, of baked goods. Comfort and memories that we thought long forgotten. It’s in the music, the all, the everything. Weaving our emotions, our souls into the very sound. Patterned waves with emotions intertwined. This and more is Everyday Sunshine. 

I feel so helpless to protect my international students right now. My university set up a simulation that we all went through to demonstrate how time-consuming, invasive, and expensive the process to get a visa can be for some students. That doesn't include buying a plane ticket and going through customs. And then finding a place to live, sight unseen. Plus, the extra fees landlords charge international students just because they can.

Imagine going through all of that, just to have your visa yanked, and if you're lucky, you get deported instead of being shackled and held at one of the detainment facilities. And you aren't even given a reason.

Many of these students come from countries where free speech is a dream. Where if you spoke out against your government, you get imprisoned or worse. They come here seeking opportunity and freedom. To a country where everyone is supposed to be free to speak out without fear of retribution from the government. Everyone is supposed to be entitled to due process and protected against being wrongfully imprisoned. Especially if you went through the stringent and expensive process to come here "legally. " Now that's all gone. And if Harvard can't protect their students from having their visas arbitrarily yanked, what is my small university supposed to do?

June Evenings

"Spring has arrived early here, a time for lovers, and it's as if the season mocks my sadness"

Commas are so out of control. Now there are two in the greeting line. (Autocorrect tried to insert a comma in the previous sentence. HA! Nice try!) They represent a pause. But when I greet you I'm not pausing. I am coming at you with all the psychotically excited energy of an anime girl. Deal with it! And Hiiiiiiii!!!! *waves frantically *

BABYMETAL - Catch Me If You Can「かくれんぼ」Full Live compilation

The two sides of my personality coming together. 

What is unreasonable? What would have been better? Clearly communicated expectations about the division of chores, about what I need in a relationship. It’s okay to leave. It’s okay to ask for what you need. It’s okay to DEMAND what you need. It’s okay to ask for what you want. It’s okay to DEMAND what you want. It’s better to have agreed upon terms and conditions. It’s even better to have an updated convo when those change. It would have been lovely to be asked if the changes were okay with me instead of just taking it away. 

Reinforcements | The A-Team TV Series

Me getting my house ready for a high level tornado risk and possible power outage.

Spring blooms

Time and attention are the most valuable things we have. No one else is entitled to your time and attention. You are not entitled to anyone else's. Cutting anyone out, even blood, to protect your peace is okay. You might feel like a villain and other family might be angry or sad, but you are entitled to spend your energy where you see fit. Other people are entitled to their feelings about that, but if they love and respect you, they will only mention an 'I feel' statement once and then drop the subject. Or not say anything at all.

We’re running a race, every second that ticks away is one down that we are able and aware. But when do you notice? Do you care? The sand slips into the glass void. Feeling the grip of time, and what do I burn for? Overwhelmed makes it difficult to focus. What do you want from these last years? What is it I adore? Waste time on people that don’t really want you? Waste time appeasing and caring for others? Or carve my own way and my own path? But WHAT is it that YOU WANT!? Sit down, figure it out quickly before the sand gives way to void. Funnel your energy into what makes you feel alive. Because now is all we ever have.