So here I'm thinking I must be doing something wrong because I can't figure out how to make this UI dingus I'm working on do what it needs to do without generating two AJAX requests rather than one, then for the sake of comparison I load up an allegedly best-in-class enterprise CRM to see how it's handled there, and discover that an equivalent operation somehow manages to hit the server seventy(!) separate times, and you know what? I think I might actually be on the right track.

This is a screencap of the trace telemetry from DataDog of a single POST made to an API I was troubleshooting last year. No one had ever gotten this notification before and our DataDog rep actually whistled when he saw it. The final trace chart was 288MB of minified .js.

That's 288MB of text.

What that js was building was a representation of the traffic that this single POST kicked off, all the way down to the final DB call. I'd show it here because it was a truly unhinged chart, but it shows privileged information. As a result of this single POST, forty four thousand, four hundred and sixty two processes were called.

From a single POST.

This was a log-in call.

The team I was embedded with didn't understand why their enterprise-grade application was non-performant.

All this is to say that frequently all "enterprise" means is "people were paid too much to make this."

Whoever decided to give your sinuses boner parts should be beaten

My sinuses have WHAT

yeah your sinuses have erectile tissue.

Even better: you know how after orgasm, erections have a tendency to go down? Yeah that's a body-wide effect. You can clear up a congested nose for an hour or so by having an orgasm.

@thriceandonce a conference paper and a newspaper article

i love you vaccines i love you research i love you reading the book instead of having chatgpt summarize it i love you critically thinking rather than reacting to a headline i love you investigating the source material i love you science i love you math even though you are personally my enemy (math/yn slowburn) i love you writing even though you try to stab me a lot i love you Experts in Your Field i love you Using The Brain

people will say "why cant the eldritch gods just be nice to humans :((" and then kill a bug for existing near them

my dearly beloved mutual you cant just leave this in the tags

While exploring a vast and inscrutable city which seems to predate life on earth I am gently picked up by something incomprehensible with the higher-dimensional equivalent of a cup and piece of paper, then lovingly set outside in my natural habitat. Unfortunately the being exists outside of time and can't really tell human cities apart from one another so I appear without warning in ancient sumer.

Comic I made a few years ago for an anthology

oh my god this is wonderful

Yep, here they come

Been thinking about an IUD? Go get it. Don’t wait.

Uk peeps!! Let’s get this going! 🏳️‍⚧️🇬🇧

...Non-UK peeps, please reblog for reach ❤️

Brighton winning

Wow. This seems… authoritarian.

This is what we're talking about. This is the resistance someone can do in their everyday job. Judgement gets passed down and you're just supposed to dot the i's and cross the t's? Don't. Just refuse.

Now, I know an acting county clerk isn't just anyone - this man had a very unique opportunity to do some very serious blockading in his everyday job - but that's kind of the point! Nobody's just anyone. You never know when you'll have an opportunity.

And here's your opportunity!

He's only an acting clerk right now. You can help keep him in that position permanently, where he's in a position to protect the rights of pregnant people--and I use that word deliberately, because the press page on his site also shows he's pushing back against Trump's anti-trans policies.

This is a local race, meaning $5 of your money will go quite far. You can also email his office to ask how you can contribute to the volunteer effort as an out-of-towner.

And because name recognition is like 50% of a race, remember: he's not "the acting clerk," he's Candidate Taylor John Bruck, and you support him for Ulster County Clerk.

Ulster County is right near my childhood home; the Catholic schools I went to had students from Ulster County. I donated $10 to the guy.

Delivered in discreet packaging my ass.

Do you understand what I'm saying?" shouted Moist. "You can't just go around killing people!"

"Why Not? You Do." The golem lowered his arm.

"What?" snapped Moist. "I do not! Who told you that?"

"I Worked It Out. You Have Killed Two Point Three Three Eight People," said the golem calmly.

"I have never laid a finger on anyone in my life, Mr Pump. I may be–– all the things you know I am, but I am not a killer! I have never so much as drawn a sword!"

"No, You Have Not. But You Have Stolen, Embezzled, Defrauded And Swindled Without Discrimination, Mr Lipvig. You Have Ruined Businesses And Destroyed Jobs. When Banks Fail, It Is Seldom Bankers Who Starve. Your Actions Have Taken Money From Those Who Had Little Enough To Begin With. In A Myriad Small Ways You Have Hastened The Deaths Of Many. You Do Not Know Them. You Did Not See Them Bleed. But You Snatched Bread From Their Mouths And Tore Clothes From Their Backs. For Sport, Mr Lipvig. For Sport. For The Joy Of The Game.

in honor of 4chan exploding, I want to remind you all that they used to do “raids” on Tumblr.

they tried to flood the popular tags with gore and porn. this was when Homestuck was at its peak, so they were a target too. (side note: tags barely functioned at all at this point so trying to make them useless was like throwing a molotov into an already burning building but try telling that to 4channers)

but the Homestuck fandom was ready and countered by flooding the tag with weirder, more explicit Homestuck porn and gore.

to the point that the trolls themselves got weirded out, fucked off, and never attempted a “raid” again.

everyone moved on but I stayed there because that is one of the funniest fucking things to happen on this website.

there's just no sustainable model for moderation at scale for social media. we really were better off with forums.

i will acknowledge the forums heyday was a time before everyone was On Line with smartphones. You had to go sit down on The Computer or the laptop to use it. Times have changed.

there was simply a smaller chud to moderator ratio back then. and i accept that you cant go back to less people online, but that just demonstrates the issue of scale

forums were small enough that the moderator team were people who knew each other and were accountable for their moderation decisions. they werent unknown people in an offshore content moderation setup. they had an investment in being part of the community and the context to make decisions. plus the lower volume of reports to be able to dedicate time to make a more measured judgement

social networks today have a completely unmanageable chud to moderator ratio. moderators are largely contractors with no connection to the place they're moderating. and the worst part: social networks prioritize DAUs over everything else. they will go easy on banning chuds because chuds look at ads and the network gets money. who cares if they make other users miserable? they keep coming back!

look how much had to happen to twitter to get people to start leaving. the rot in that place set in YEARS before elon bought the place yet there's still holders-on.

on a forum, someone breaks the rules they get banned. you get a big fat "USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST" on the post that did them in and i will bet my balls that reprimand did more for keeping the place civil than any "community note" ever has

looking for a Black sensitivity reader to give feedback on a half-hour script. pay is $80, and there might be more episodes later.

drawings you can hear

*new yawk voice*

this is the most spiritually correct a hypothetical media headcanon has ever been

“nothing tastes as good as skinny feels”

damn you must suck at cooking. check out some youtube tutorials man. i believe in you.

tbh it’s bc everyone thinks “see when it’s MY time to wear the boot, it’s all actually gonna work bc I know who the REAL deviants are”

the thing w Transformers is if you get into it deep enough eventually you're like 'wait this is just yaoi Steven Universe'. but then you remember that Transformers predates Steven Universe by a number of years so its like. has Steven Universe been yuri Transformers all along? much to think about.

Funny you should say that...

The "number of years" TF predates SU is like...3 whole decades btw.