omg so i just realised that the bio/caption thing is gone so just quickly for now. shall update later.
my name is niwa!
i’m an adult. i’m over 18. i write both sfw and nsfw (so please take caution)
i’m from new zealand! (and proudly māori)
i’m also a multi stan. i stan a lot of groups too be honest. could talk about haechan for ages.
always open for a chat. sometimes i reply fast and other times i don’t. it really depends.
my about me is somewhere around here but tbh it needs an upgrade. (someone pls tell me how to use carrd).
latest update :
[11:37pm] you feel the breath caught in your throat, eyes wide as you take in the situation. wind wild in your hair and your faces painted with rain. situationship!beomgyu’s eyes zig zag across your face, looking for any inkling that he hadn’t ruined everything with his emotionally filled rant. only he doesn’t find anything that reassures him. he’s been haunted for months on end with these feelings, this fuelled passion he’s felt for you and he gets the feeling that this is a novelty for you. the idea of him and you in the way he wants. and to make matters worse, you take a step back, letting the unrelenting wind blow away the fragments of his vulnerable heart.
Y/N : if anger issues was a person. in a constant state of pms and judgement - y/n, as told by mingi.
MINGI : self proclaimed ‘bad boy’ but is really just an idiot. If bad boy means taking lactose pills before consuming dairy then yeah, he’s a bad boy. - mingi, as told by y/n.
HONGJOONG : mingi’s gay friend. really sassy and flamboyant but also stiff. needs a bit of meat on his bones. - hongjoong, as told by san.
SAN : y/n’s barely tolerable friend. too loud. but also probably the nicest smelling straight man ever to walk the earth. - san, as told by hongjoong.
TWO
you used to hate each other, but now you’re a little more than that. some habits are just a little hard to move on from. // where you’re navigating the ins and outs when dating your enemy.
profiles
masterlist | next
Two
pairing : used to be enemy!mingi x fem!reader
genre : fluff. comedy-ish. slice of life fic - no real plot/storyline.
warnings : banter. suggestive at times. petty shit.
summary : you used to hate each other, but now you’re a little more than that. some habits are just a little hard to move on from. // where you’re navigating the ins and outs when dating your enemy.
status : ongoing
profiles | moodboard
(TWO) :
(TWO) :
(TWO) :
(TWO) :
(TWO) :
The Price of Perfection
pairing: Academic Rival! Jake x fem! reader
synopsis: You are always first. The one everyone expects to win. Confident, prideful, and untouchable. People admire you, envy you, resent you. But it doesn’t matter because in the end, you always prove them right. Then you go home. And first place isn’t enough. Second is unacceptable. Third is a disgrace. Anything less is failure. But then there’s Jake. Jake, who wins because he loves to. Jake, who has everything you don’t.
And the moment he looked past the perfect image you built, everything began to change.
warnings: This story contains themes of parental neglect, emotional abuse, academic pressure, and self-doubt. It covers on inadequacy, angst, and emotional breakdowns, but also slow-burn romance and comfort. Read at your own risk.
author's note: This story is deeply personal to me. It’s the first time I’ve poured so much emotion into something. If you relate to any part of this, please remember: you are enough. Always. Thank you for reading.
permanent tag list: @sol3chu @chlorinecake @13tter @jung1w0n @layzfy @firstclassjaylee @ijustwannareadstuff20
The cameras flashed. The medal's weight around your neck was heavier than it should’ve been. Gold, cold, undeserved. Applauses were loud.
You smiled. Of course you did. It was the expression expected of a champion. Graceful, composed, proud. You had practiced it enough times in the mirror, so much so that it no longer hesitated. You let the corners of your lips go upward just right, enough to appear humble but not so much that you seemed arrogant. Enough to sell the illusion that this victory was yours to enjoy.
Your parents stood at the front of the crowd. Their hands clapped the loudest, and their smiles stretched the widest. They shook hands, nodded in gratitude, and took every compliment thrown their way as if they were the ones who had spent sleepless nights preparing. As if they were the ones who had earned this. “We’re so proud,” they had said when your name was announced. “You did it.”
Did what, exactly?
You stood there as the flashes went off, the cheers rang in your ears, and your parents continued to receive congratulations on your behalf. You stood there and dared to look down.
Second place was crying.
Not just the silent kind, not the polite, quiet tears of someone accepting defeat, but the kind that came from deep inside, that cracked a person open. Their shoulders trembled as they looked down at their silver medal, fingers curling around it so tightly you thought it might shatter.
And then there were the others. The ones who had fought, who had given everything, who had wanted this much more than you ever did. Some stood stiffly, disappointment carved into their faces, blinking back the loss with forced indifference. Others stared blankly at the floor, avoiding your gaze because looking at you only deepened the wound.
It didn’t feel good.
It never did.
Taking something that wasn’t yours to take, crushing someone’s dreams just because you could. It didn’t feel good. It didn’t feel right.
And maybe it wouldn’t have felt so hollow if this had been your dream. If you had wanted this as badly as they did. If you had fought, struggled, and clawed your way to the top because it was something you couldn’t live without. But that wasn’t the case.
You had never wanted this.
But you won anyway.
And that was the worst part of it all.
honestly its been a hard week. I’m tired and exhausted and grieving but I loved this so so much ❤️ i loved the gradual building of trust and respect between the two and jay in general.
YEONJUN ✙ GQ Interview
i love when he gets attention, it’s like i’m getting attention, it’s like a reward
group hug ! ! !
2000.03.20: happy birthday hyunjin 🎂💘 — watch hyunjin grow up: you bloomed into the most beautiful and special flower
unexpected special stage