Look, I’m a simple man. If you’re going to have people looking longing/over-seriously at Chalamet while passable Dylan performances play, I’m happy enough.
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Moana 2 2024
Apparently the songwriters purposefully included Samoan lines for Dwayne Johnson, which is great.
But my conspiracy remains: the major purpose of that song, and giving him the opening lines/any lines at all, was to make us less likely to discuss how awful his attempt at the climactic number was.
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Beau Is Afraid 2023
This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.
Im worried there's not a lot to review succinctly about this movie that hasn't already been said in a pithy way.
Beau is Afraid is as overly indulgent as you've heard, with a dearth of traditional scares and humour which is as uncomfortable as its subject matter. But it's a four star film, for me, no questions asked.
It's a journey of conflicting readings, whose subtleties are difficult to parse: dream vs fantasy, empathy vs sympathy, guilt vs self-pity, projection…
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Gladiator II 2024
This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.
*Roman legionnaires at the back of their formation, a kilometre away from where disheveled Paul Mescal is ranting*
(Taking up the common chant): Aye! Aye! Aye!
Legionnaire 1: do you have any idea what we’re agreeing to?
Legionnaire 2: I think we just committed to a radical political reorganisation on the basis of some guys ring inscription.
Legionnaire 1: Must be a day that ends in Y
(Returning to chant) Aye Aye Aye!
Seinfeld-esque bass riff, cut to credits.
… But Denzel is great
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