howard... i hate you so much for leaving me here, sometimes i hope you die. i'm sorry. i feel awful admitting that, but it's the truth. i was curious about other men. i'm sure you don't want to hear about a stranger satisfying your wife, but i swear it was only once. it was a mistake. it wasn't him that i wanted. i know that now. and i wish things could just go back to the way they were before,…
