The only two things that could have made this viewing experience more palatable:
1) I enter an alternate reality where this movie is directed by John Carpenter and stars Kurt Russell and Winona Ryder in the Chris Pratt and Millie Bobby Brown roles. And also is released in the 80s and is at least 89% more silly.
2) I learn that half of the absolutely inexcusable $320 million budget went to Stanley Tucci’s salary, which finally allows him to follow his…
The protagonists make a few too many dumb decisions for my taste, but the slow burn tension in the first half is incredible, and James McAvoy cements his place as among the best at playing unhinged characters.
Does Star Wars have too much charisma for your taste? Does Dune have too much plot? Is Avatar too visually stunning? Boy, do I have the movie for you!
(Please Zack Snyder I beg you, hire someone else to shoot your movies, whatever it is you’ve been doing lately hurts my eyes.)
This is the best kind of Godzilla movie because it’s the kind that makes you want to say “hell yeah” and fist pump the air not whenever Godzilla does something awesome, but whenever people do.
