Tightly and sexily made spy thriller that makes me want British people to be real. My sphincter was not ready for how entertaining this movie was.
Closer to a 7.5/10. Cate Blanchett and Michael Fassbender were an extreme power couple.
CREEPER....AW MAN!
Robert Pattinson could not carry this movie, he acted his ass off and had great chemistry with himself but it was not enough to detract from the movies bizarre pacing, self-indulgent quirkiness, ham-fisted themes, half-baked plot lines, and subpar acting from the non-stars.
Maybe the monsters were the humans all along type beat vs the indominable human spirit on train
This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.
Gotta go fast. Y'all ever just hit a superpowered dap up to save the world?