Favorite films

Recent reviews

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  Blink Twice 2024

  ★★★★ Rewatched 01 Mar 2025

  “Blink Twice” (2024) – A second watch review

  Turns out, watching this again was like ordering the same cocktail but realizing the bartender made it way stronger this time. The humor hit harder, the wit felt sharper, and the absolute insanity of the story? Even more deranged (in the best way).

  Zoë Kravitz really said, “What if The White Lotus got drunk, took a left turn into the Twilight Zone, and never came back?” And honestly? I respect that. The…

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  The Monkey 2025

  ★★ Watched 21 Feb 2025

  The Monkey? More like The Flunky, because this movie failed every possible vibe check. Or maybe The Clunky, because the plot moved with the grace of a three-legged table. Either way, I’d rather be haunted by an actual evil monkey than sit through this again.

Popular reviews

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  The Substance 2024

  ★★★★ Watched 13 Nov 2024

  Shoutout to the OzempicTM ad that played before the movie

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  Heart Eyes 2025

  ★★★ Watched 14 Feb 2025

  Me, five minutes in: “Oh, this is funny and cute.”
  Me, thirty minutes in: frothing at the mouth, clutching my chest like a Victorian widow, whispering ‘cinema’
  Me, by the end: deceased
  *Pre movie trailers ends*

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