The incoherent ramblings of a man who hates that he loves movies.
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The Ring 2002
This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.
The bathtub suicide scene is just so extra. Like a fuckin simple toaster would’ve done the trick. This man gathered everything with a 120v plug in the entire town to toss in his bath. Dedication to the deed. Respect.
Also this is peak 2000’s horror.
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New Nightmare 1994
Finally getting around to this 15+ years later. One of the coolest concepts for a horror franchise I’ve ever seen.
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Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban 2004
This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.
The closest thing to a stand-alone Harry Potter movie we got in the whole rig. Introducing Gary Oldman as the best character in the franchise, Gambon as the best iteration of Dumbledore, and David Thewlis as one of the best supporting characters for the rest of the series. This thing does nothing but kick ass for two and a half hours. It’s got Harry fucking up his dumb ass family, time travel, werewolves, a glimpse of a villain yet to…
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