Theo T

Theo T

I like turning artful films into unfunny one sentence reviews

Favorite films

  • Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse
  • Star Wars
  • A Grand Day Out

Recent activity

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  • You're Cordially Invited

  • A Complete Unknown

    ★★½

  • A Close Shave

    ★★★★

  • The Wrong Trousers

    ★★★★★

Recent reviews

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  • You're Cordially Invited

    You're Cordially Invited

    So sad to hear about the unexpected passing of Mia Khalifa 😢 Rest in power Queen! 

    I’m the CEO of Delta Airlines

  • A Complete Unknown

    A Complete Unknown

    ★★½

    What a dick. 

    Biopics usually make me feel a deeper connection and foster an appreciation for the multi-dimensionality of an individual. I walk out of the theater feeling fulfilled and appreciative for my own experiences and whatnot. But not this one. He’s just a dick. 

    In all seriousness though, it was a well made movie in some aspects. The costume and makeup was on point, and the cinematographic style was creative and consistent. The actors Ed Norton, Monica Barbaro, Scoot…

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  • Courier

    Courier

    ★★★½

    My idiot bastard son (who I hate) won’t stop drinking his condensed milk straight from the carton.

  • Nosferatu

    Nosferatu

    ★★★

    Not the best choice for family movie night 

    Good film but fell off the bandwagon a bit. Amazing first act in establishing the world and characters. The cinematography was stellar and the actors gave solid performances all around.