Makes the rest of 2024's films look like insignificant detours. Unsettling, to say the least, but important and beautifully, lovingly made.

Or, THE FIVE-YEAR ITCH. Colbert is excellent as always, giving everything from slapstick to deep pathos (with an excellent detour into telling off a rich society witch) as a wife who's reconsidering the foundation of her marriage, while Milland gives a great performance playing what we'd now call a manipulative, narcissistic, workaholic creep.

Hooray for the most unlikeable protagonist since Purple Rain. Here we have Michael Douglas as a homophobic rapist who gets along with his misogynist co-workers except when he's slamming them into walls. Which he also does to the women in his life. Who seem to like him, despite EVERYTHING ABOUT HIM. Half a point to Sharon Stone, who does her steely best, and another half-point for sheer absurdity, but this movie has a lot of nerve being famous when it's ultimately a mystery with one suspect.

More like The Slighthouse. You wouldn't think a movie with mermaid vagina, Pattinson jerking off, and naked Dafoe shooting lights out his eyes would be so goddamn boring, but here it is.