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Black Bag 2025
“Black Bag lost so and so million dollars at the box office” shut up shut the hell up I will zip you into a suitcase and throw you down the stairs I don’t care how many people see them if they ever stop making movies like this I will really have to make some hard choices
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Live and Let Die 1973
Amazing that the most racist thing was the backwater parish sheriff. Jane Seymour stuff gross all of it. Speedboats fun. But let me just say you’re being led into a lagoon full of crocodiles by a man with a steel claw and not once do you think to throw your supermagnetic Rolex in with the crocodiles? And you wonder why people miss the other guy
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Waves 2019
This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.
Hi. My name is WHITE FILMMAKER Trey Edward Shults. My movie is so fire it lists the COLORIST in the OPENING CREDITS. My characters listen to Kendrick Lamar AND Animal Collective, and only text with TYPOS because that’s how REAL PEOPLE text. And when the TORTURED PROTAGONIST character murders the pregnant girlfriend character, you BETTER BELIEVE I CHANGE the ASPECT RATIO to show his BOXED-IN mindset. I am very smart AND I went to FILM SCHOOL.
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