Favorite films

Recent reviews

• 

  Alien: Romulus 2024

  ★½ Watched 18 Feb 2025 1

  Breastfeeding. Wow. Just…*shakes head in disappointment*…wow.
  #stillbetterthanbarbarian

• 

  Oldboy 2003

  ★ Watched 12 Feb 2024

  What. The. Hell. I almost dipped when dude ate the octopus. Now there are teeth.
  In the fight scene in the hallway, rewind to watch the dudes behind the guys fighting (let me at him). It’s hilarious. Ok, more teeth. What the holy awkwardness are these “sex” scenes. I can’t with this movie.

Popular reviews

• 

  Fifty Shades of Grey 2015

  ½ Watched 23 May 2023 3

  50 Shades of WTF DID I JUST WATCH?!?

  No wonder these people are weird- they’re in Portland.
  Ok, we have Patrick Bateman and a college kid who seems pretty vanilla.
  Your name is what?! 
  Her: Me no make questions good
  Him: I know people
  (He might be the only human whose face is actually improved by facial hair).
  Is “heart” a euphemism here? Is it sexy stuff yet?? “Are you gay?” GOT IT!! 
  Wanna be my “intern” *wink wink*
  Lonely…

• 

  Burlesque 2010

  ★★★ Rewatched 08 May 2023 1

  This movie gets two stars just for the enjoyment I got knowing Zack & Nischal have to watch it :D

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