the writer's undisguised sexual fantasy. like was she going for a book tok esque romantic movie or a poor modern take on Lolita that loses itself in how horny it is for the cast??

dagmara dominczyk doing a fake southern accent? unbelievably hot, she's in a silk slip the entire movie. so i'll give a star for that honestly. this movie should have instead been focusing in on her undefined job and having a complicated relationship with someone younger/new and subordinate in her company, played by me!

i definitely conflated watching van helsing with watching this but maybe the alcohol is speaking bc i enjoyed this more. i'll probably be raving to my 4k followers on the rennet app, this is really a cornerstone of early 2010s steampunk obsession

they're serving levels of cunt here that needs to be studied in a Master's Level Cuntology course.
like here comes Pam Grier (Jackie Brown btw) who plays Detective Cuntita facing off against the fairly vampiric performance Rose McGowan serves here. we even get treated to weird beautiful girl cunt serving from ms. violet fern.

i felt like i was in this bc things didn't make sense but i knew the things and why they weren't making sense