Let’s keep it to two hours (unless it’s really really really good and worth it)
I rarely review and when I do I'm being a sillygoofyguy.
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Vertigo 2 2024
Midge (and the spider) here! Watching this film was a real trip. For one, it was a trip down memory lane. This was filmed in a different era of my life. At the time, I was in the process of finishing up my degree, leaving academia for a different career path, and realizing that my most committed romantic relationship to date was reaching its conclusion. My then partner, Seth, was buzzing around our philosophical frat house hurrying to finish this…
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The Cook, the Thief, His Wife & Her Lover 1989
F*ck this movie. I don’t care if it’s a political allegory. It’s just gross. How much abuse do I have to sit through before getting any reward? The answer: way more than the payoff is worth.
The two stars are just for the cinematography, the set, and Gaultier’s designs.
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The Favourite 2018
Gay! British! Decadent! Demented!
What more could I ask of a period piece about royals?
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Elf 2003
While Elf might only be a 3-star movie, it’s a top-notch Christmas movie. Yes I’m sick of seeing it year after year, but I’d still rather watch this one again and again over just about any other Christmas movie.
It’s cute, it’s pretty funny, it’s heartwarming enough. And it’s inoffensive to almost everyone.
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