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Gran Turismo 2023
This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.
Many baffling things about this movie start to make all the sense in the world once you learn that it was written by the American Sniper guy. Mainly why a Playstation commercial decided to go the "it was so harrowing for this Gamer to pancake a whole ass person while trying to prove that playing on the console for 10 hours a day is actually good (it improves your reflexes)" route for its story: this is just "slaughtering Iraqi children was so sad for U.S. soldiers :(" remastered for the new gen.
It was actually "From racist to gamer" all along.
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Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 2023
This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.
Me pointing a gun at Super Saiyan 3 Hitler, who has his hand on the Evil Enactment button: If I kill you… then I am no better than you.
I turn away from him and from the world of violence, only to slip in the blood of all the henchmen I killed to get there. When I fall, I accidentally shoot Hitler, saving the Multiverse. My soul leaves my body, burdened with the weight of such a sin, and falls to Hell. The last thing I hear before eternal damnation is God’s distraught weeping.
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Otherwise pretty good movie.
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Black Widow 2021
This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.
The Cold War was a period of geopolitical tension between the Western Bloc and the Eastern Bloc due to their vibes not matching. Just a rancid mood from the boys in red. Glad they got it together!
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