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Trap 2024
This was truly a diabolical film (if it can even be considered that) which I absolutely loved. It was so camp; the actors were dreadful, mediocre plot twist, a serial killer with mommy issues, and absolutely NO Barbie.
I would simultaneously give this 0 stars and 100 stars (with the addition of Barbie).
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Barbie: Princess Charm School 2011
I’m awarding this movie the three C’s (Camp, c*nt, and cute). Finally a movie with realistic ginger female representation. I was clutching my pearls when Barbie and her cohort showed up in their remastered school uniform and were like ‘technically this is our uniform’ and they continued to serve in their mini skirt and ties. Ellewood’s core. Revolutionary. Truly. I love Barbie cosplaying poorcore while she’s a princess- but she can do that! She’s Barbie.
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The Substance 2024
I am truly so glad I seen this movie. The commentary on the modern standards of women (particularly those prominent in media and the entertainment industry) was very pointed and struck me to the core. The colour palette is beautiful- the actresses are phenomenal, and the storyline is timeless yet poignant. The grotesque nature of 90% of the scenes (particularly when the Elisasue monster vomits a boob out of one of its many orifices) was truly terrifying, yet emphasised the disturbing beauty standards put into women.
However, there was a severe lack of Barbie. And with this in mind- I think my rating more than fair.
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Barbie of Swan Lake 2003
The Juilliard training really paid off here. Barbie’s flawless ballet technique works perfectly with the supernatural elements of the masterpiece. The little freak kids are incredibly talented and their agents have my upmost respect. I suspect the wee hedgehog thing was definitely a diva; but that’s kids in the entertainment industry for you! The use of Stanislavsky technique makes for a hard hitting performance that shakes me to the core every time I watch this. Well done!
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