It's hard to be a Nosferatu nowadays.
Nicolas Cage displays his near-clairvoyant ability to detect a failing movie and rescue it in style. "Vampire's Kiss" is a poorly written and oddly edited erotic horror with a mental illness subtext that has been made timeless through its thoroughly devoured scenery. Every line in this script deserves Cage's weird Transylvanian dialect. Peter Loew is an odd, impersonable impression of a man in a business suit who becomes magnetic when embodied by Cage.…
I'm really not sure what the plot of this movie was but damn. Those puppets sure could master.
Amidst a meandering, messily campy plot (the bisexual sex psychic is fun, but, also what the fuck are you talking about? What the fuck is that?) is a decently fun slasher flick that wears its heart on its sleeve. The puppet designs are loads of fun (with some slight-yet-significant racist exceptions) even if the kills are somewhat lackluster for most of the…
This movie sucked so good. There were cunt-serving death witches, shower ghosts, multiple implied incest plotlines, a simp, The Man, and someone getting the violin played at them so hard that they die. It has awful effects and characters that range from "yeah, okay, I get it" to impossible to track. It rules.
