Rutger Hauer

Rutger Hauer

They thought they could put me in the grave, but I'm back.

They/their because they don't have any options for android genders

Favorite films

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  • Unthinkable

    ★★★★

  • The Paperboy

    ★★★★

  • Passengers

    ★★

  • Fatal Attraction

    ★★★

Recent reviews

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  • Unthinkable

    Unthinkable

    ★★★★

    Maybe I liked this more because watched it in Spanish. Language barriers let corny dialogue get away with shit that normally would be normally unbearable. Nonetheless, I thought this was gonna be a basic pro-govt propaganda piece, especially since it was going for that abu ghraib theme lol. It ended up being pretty honest and up front. Gotta appreciate it

  • The Paperboy

    The Paperboy

    ★★★★

    It was honestly stunning and awesome for the first 80% or so and then it got really kooky self-indulgent. Like this was pretty dang good; the fall off was pretty hard tho lol

    Edit: the acting was pretty stellar tho too. Like some of the best I’ve seen from like all of those actors

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  • Avatar: The Way of Water

    Avatar: The Way of Water

    ½

    Cameron proves once again that he's the king of uninspired dogshit. Fast and Furious is more fun, and has a deeper message.

    Imagine going to such great lengths to make a commentary on indigenous exploitation and genocide that doesn't include a single indigenous voice or actor. Just so absurdly funny.

    Hollywood keeps dishing this shit out for white people. Dances with wolves, then Dances with wolves japanese edition in The Last Samurai, and then Dances with wolves space edition with…

  • Ice Age: Collision Course

    Ice Age: Collision Course

    ★★★★★

    The Ice Age series remains unparalleled in their ability to provide insightful and original commentary on distinct facets of the human condition through the metaphor of ancient animals.

    This, quinary, installment of the series breaks with the previous ones with its larger scope and focus. It immediately breaks the character into two groups, the squirrel and the rest of the animals. The squirrel stumbles away from the animals through in a vomit of lust for and pride in his acorn,…

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