Apart from movies which I know beforehand to feature extensive rape scenes, such as Irreversible, there is only one other genre I actively avoid. It's not horror or rom-coms or even musicals, but fish-fucking movies. That is, movies containing at least one or more instance of human beings having sexual relations with fish or fishoid creature(s). Up til now, as far as I was aware, the only constituent of this genre was Del Toro's The Shape of Water, which I…
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The Brutalist 2024
This was kind of incredible but had a few issues, particularly with the second half. First off, it makes no sense how much English the main character and his wife speak to each other. It's one thing when they have company or if they really needed to work on their English (they didn't), it's another when they're by themselves, in bed, at the dinner table, in a car, etc. It very much reminds you that the actors aren't really Hungarian…
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Synecdoche, New York 2008
There's a tunnel beneath the surface of the moon that a stumpy little orc named Charlie Kaufmann calls home.
"How's it hangin'?", I ask Mr. Orcmann, gesturing indiscreetly at his mamba-dicked moonhorse. We share a hearty laugh, a few tears.
Our next meeting, an exchange of good mornings. "What's up?", I ask, blind in the unlit lunar depths. He turns to (where I assume is) his identical twin brother, who is actually Nicholas Cage. They furiously scour the omnidirectional darkness,…
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The Godfather Part III 1990
Where do I even start with this fucking piece of shit movie? Maybe with the stupid ass exposition at the beginning. The Corleones are like the quintessential tight knit family in American cinema, there is no way any of these characters needed to be reminded who each other were. It also doesn't make any sense that Anthony only figured out in like his late 20s that Michael ordered the hit on Fredo. We didn't need Kay to explain how she…
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