Donnie Driftwood

Donnie Driftwood Pro

Favorite films

  • Barton Fink
  • The Texas Chain Saw Massacre
  • Escape from New York
  • Santa Sangre

Recent activity

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  • The Woman in the Yard

    ½

  • The Fearless Vampire Killers

    ★½

  • Cannibal Mukbang

    ★★★½

  • The Necro Files

Recent reviews

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  • The Woman in the Yard

    The Woman in the Yard

    ½

    Man, you can really tell when Bunghouse Films is killing time before their next multi-million hit. The wait for M3GAN 2 is painful.

    A boring, empty, morally confused, fucking sham of a film. This is a pathetic stab at A24 pastiche and Jordan Peele's style, including TWO bargin bin Lupitas! The scares and tension are absent, and other than a couple instances of neat imagery, it's hollow metaphors and generally a chore to look at.

    Also, it's not lost on…

  • The Fearless Vampire Killers

    The Fearless Vampire Killers

    ★½

    I just....do not know how to process this one.

    The atmosphere is surprisingly good. However, Polanski is about as good at comedy writing as he is at not being a pedo rapist genital wart.

    I could sense where HE was laughing at this. Characters just kinda start being mildly silly....and the scenes continue. A horror-themed comedy with minimal dialogue could work! Just not here, apparently.

    All my love to Sharon Tate.

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  • CatVideoFest 2023

    CatVideoFest 2023

    ★★★★★

    You have not lived until you've been in an art house theater, filled to capacity, clapping for a little kitten who finally jumped up a single stair.

    Wholesome, and for a good cause.

  • Beau Is Afraid

    Beau Is Afraid

    ½

    All due condolences to Ari Aster's mother.

    First act had some admittedly great comedy. You are a fool if you think a comedy's necessary energy can be maintained for this runtime. Literally the only likable character is the UPS guy. Beau could be played by Mr. Bean and absolutely nothing would change.

    Second act was astoundingly pretty and crushingly long. Not much of consequence.

    As a man who lost his mother and, while loving her deeply, have had complicated feelings…

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