i got 𝓷𝓸𝓽𝓱𝓲𝓷𝓰 to lose
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The Death of Stalin 2017
★★★½☆– 3.65/5
“you’re not even a person. you’re a testicle.” yeah ok i get the hype
so like. i knew this was gonna be dark comedy, but DAMN, this was dark. like baby’s-first-terror-regime dark. executions offscreen, disappearances in the background, people straight up having panic attacks over choosing the wrong DOCTOR ?? hello ?? also the scene with the guards refusing to check on stalin because they might get shot for it ?? absolutely unhinged, 10/10 anxiety, i was sweating
tonally…
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Bridget Jones: Mad About the Boy 2025
bridget jones: mad about the botox
look they had to kill off mark darcy somehow. the man had already gone through three movies of rom-com-induced suffering and i guess being blown up in a darfur bombing was the only way they could finally let him rest. RIP to colin firth but this might be the best thing to happen to the franchise — because for once bridget isn’t just running in circles trying to get (or keep) a man. instead…
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Emilia Pérez 2024
man to woman ! 👆 from penis to vaginaaaaaa 🎶🗣️
this was a completely unhinged disaster but in a deeply frustrating way. like if you’re gonna be THIS messy at least be FUN MESSY. instead it’s somehow both wildly offensive AND insanely boring. how do you take a premise this insane and make it feel like a dull overly self-serious narco-thriller with a couple of deeply embarrassing musical numbers scattered in ?
zoe saldaña was acting her ass off but…
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Babygirl 2024
nicole kidman really said i am mother but in a different way
look. i love a good two freaky bitches on the same frequency movie and i wanted to be into this. but for something that’s technically about desire this movie felt … weirdly sexless ? like yes there’s sex. there’s BDSM-lite. there’s harris dickinson whispering “good girl” in a way that probably activated something primal in half the audience. but somehow none of it hits
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