Jacob

Jacob Patron

Favorite films

  • Scooby-Doo
  • The Dark Knight
  • Portrait of a Lady on Fire
  • Imagine Me & You

Recent activity

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  • Little Women

    ★★★★

  • The Bad Guys

    ★★★

  • Tall Girl

  • 5 to 7

    ★★★

Pinned reviews

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  • I Am Number Four

    I Am Number Four

    ★★

    If I was 14 I might’ve thought this movie was cool and deep but unfortunately I’m 27.

  • The Truman Show

    The Truman Show

    ★★★★½

    If it was called The Jacob Show either the show or I would be cancelled within a week

Recent reviews

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  • Little Women

    Little Women

    ★★★★

    Happy International Women’s Day, so you know I had to watch this one. Starts a little slow but really picks up by the end. I guess there wasn’t much to do back in the 1860’s except stare out windows and dance, they really were steppin’! Also respect to Timmy C for dropping the I love you so much I’ll kill myself move.

  • The Bad Guys

    The Bad Guys

    ★★★

    Scavenger Hunt Feb ‘25
    Movie 15/15
    9. Watch a movie with a spider in it

    Yes I was a pussy and saved this one for last. Yes I pussied out even more and chose an animated movie, but you know what idc I finished the hunt! This was a fun one, definitely a good turn your brain off movie. Thanks to everyone that participated with me!

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  • Some Girl(s)

    Some Girl(s)

    ½

    This genuinely might be the worst movie I’ve ever watched. It was boring, had awful dialogue, and the main character is a horrible person with no redeeming qualities other than he’s played by Adam Brody. I love all the actresses in this movie but I’m not sure why I’d want to watch a man fumble over his words in front of several women for 90 mins when that’s something I experience firsthand almost daily.

  • Above the Shadows

    Above the Shadows

    ★★

    Semi interesting concept, bad execution. If I were invisible I definitely would not be selling paparazzi photos, I’d be too busy doing things like haunting people, misreading locker room signs, and poisoning the ohio state football team’s gatorade before the michigan game.