If I Were Another: Poems
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Winner of the PEN USA Literary Award for Translation
Mahmoud Darwish was that rare literary phenomenon: a poet both acclaimed by critics as one of the most important poets in the Arab world and beloved by his readers. His language—lyrical and tender—helped to transform modern Arabic poetry into a living metaphor for the universal experiences of exile, loss, and identity. The poems in this collection, constructed from the cadence and imagery of the Palestinian struggle, shift
between the most intimate individual experience and the burdens of history and collective memory. Brilliantly translated by Fady Joudah, If I Were Another—which collects the greatest epic works of Darwish's mature years—is a powerful yet elegant work by a master poet and demonstrates why Darwish was one of the most celebrated poets of his time and was hailed as the voice and conscience of an entire people.
Mahmoud Darwish
Mahmoud Darwish (1941-2008) was a Palestinian poet and writer, regarded as the Palestinian national poet. He published over thirty books of poetry during his life. Ibrahim Muhawi is coauthor and translator of Speak Bird, Speak Again: Palestinian Arab Folktales (California, 1988) and Mahmoud Darwish’s Journal of an Ordinary Grief (Archipelago Books, 2010), for which he won the PEN Translation Prize. Sinan Antoon is an Iraqi poet, novelist, translator, and scholar. He has published novels and verse in both Arabic and English, and is currently a professor at New York University.
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If I Were Another - Mahmoud Darwish
INTRODUCTION Mahmoud Darwish’s Lyric Epic
When Mahmoud Darwish and I met on August 4, 2008, five days before he underwent the surgery that would end his life, he reiterated the centrality and importance Mural holds for this collection. In Mural he grasped what he feared would be his last chance to write after surviving cardiovascular death for the second time in 1999. The poem was a song of praise that affirms life and the humanity not only of the marginalized Palestinian but also of the individual on this earth, and of Mahmoud Darwish himself. Mural was made into a play by the Palestinian National Theatre shortly after its publication in 2000 without any prompting from Darwish (his poetry has often been set to film, music, and song). The staged poem has continued to tour the world to astounding acclaim, in Paris, Edinburgh, Tunisia, Ramallah, Haifa, and elsewhere. A consummate poet at the acme of innermost experience, simultaneously personal and universal, between the death of language and physical death, Darwish created something uniquely his: the treatise of a private speech become collective. Mural was the one magnum opus of which he was certain, a rare conviction for a poet who reflects on his completed works with harsh doubt equal only to his ecstatic embrace when on the threshold of new poems.
His first experience of death, in 1984, was peaceful and painless, filled with whiteness.
The second was more traumatic and was packed with intense visions. Mural gathered Darwish’s experiences of life, art, and death, in their white serenity and violent awakening, and accelerated his late style
into prolific, progressively experimental output in search of new possibilities in language and form, under the shadow of absence and a third and final death. Who am I to disappoint the void / who am I,
ask the final lines of The Dice Player, Darwish’s last uncollected lyric epic, written weeks before his death on August 9, 2008. But I still remember his boyish, triumphant laugh when I said to him: "The Dice Player is a distilled Mural in entirely new diction, and his reply:
Some friends even call it the anti-Mural." He had overcome his own art (and death) for one last time, held it apart from himself so that it would indisputably and singularly belong to him and he to it.
If I Were Another is a tribute to Darwish’s lyric epic, and to the essence of his late style,
the culmination of an entire life in dialogue that merges the self with its stranger, its other, in continuous renewal within the widening periphery of human grace. The two collections of long poems that begin this book, I See What I Want (1990) and Eleven Planets (1992), mark the completion of Darwish’s middle period. In them he wove a space for the jasmine
and (super)imposed it on the oppressive exclusivity of historical and antinomian narrative. In 1990, between the personal and the collective, birth [was] a riddle,
but in 1996 birth became a cloud in [Darwish’s] hand.
And by Mural’s end (2000), there was no cloud in [his] hand / no eleven planets / on [his] temple.
Instead there was the vowel in his name, the letter Wāw, loyal to birth wherever possible.
By 2005, Darwish would return, through the medium or vision of almond blossoms, the flower of his birth in March, to revisit the memory and meaning of place, and the I
in place, through several other selves, in Exile, his last collected long poem. Dialectic, lyric, and drama opened up a new space for time in his poetry, a lateness
infused with age and survival while it does not go gentle into that good night.
* * *
It is necessary to read Darwish’s transformation of the long poem over the most accomplished fifteen years of his life: the shift in diction from a gnomic and highly metaphoric drive to a stroll of mixed and conversational speech; the paradoxes between private and public, presence and absence; the bond between the individual and the earth, place, and nature; the illumination of the contemporary Sufi aesthetic method as the essence of poetic knowledge, on the interface of reason and the sensory, imagination and the real, the real and its vanishing where the I
is interchangeable with (and not split from) its other; and his affair with dialogue and theater (tragic, absurd, or otherwise) to produce a lyric epic sui generis. If Darwish’s friend the great critic Edward Said had a leaning toward the novel, Darwish was undoubtedly a playwright at heart. This had been evident since his youth, whether in poems like A Soldier Dreams of White Lilies (written in 1967 and now a part of the Norwegian live-film-performance Identity of the Soul [2008], in which Darwish is featured) or Writing to the Light of a Rifle (1970), or in his brilliant early prose book and its title piece, Diaries of Ordinary Sorrow (1973).
Yet Darwish was never comfortable with looking back at his glorious past. He was an embodiment of exile, as both existential and metaphysical state, beyond the merely external, and beyond metaphor, in his interior relations with self and art. Naturally, and perhaps reflexively, Darwish expressed a fleeting reservation at my desire to include here the two older volumes I See What I Want and Eleven Planets. True, the two are linked to a larger historical reel than is Mural or Exile, since the former volumes were written during the first Palestinian Intifada, which began in 1987, a major defining event in the identity and hopes of a dispossessed people, and in response to the spectacle of the peace accords Darwish knew would follow. But more important, in these two volumes Darwish had written his Canto General, his Notebook of a Return to My Native Land, his Omeros, destabilizing the hegemony of myth into an inclusive, expansive humanizing lyric that soars, like a hoopoe, over a Canaanite reality and an Andalusian song, where vision is both Sufi and Sophoclean, and elegy arches over the father, the lover, and the other, as well as over a grand historical narrative and its liminal stages on this earth.
I See What I Want and Eleven Planets are collections concerned with vision, not image. Even their titles read as one. In the first instance of seeing, Darwish declares a singular self that creates its private lexicon of sorrow and praise and transformation into the collective: a prebiblical past, a Palestinian present, and a future where the self flies just to fly,
free from the knot of symbols,
to where compassion is one in the nights
with one moon for all, for both sides of the trench.
In Eleven Planets, the self has vanished into its other, more elegiacally, and flight
has reached 1492, the year of the Atlantic banners of Columbus
and the Arab’s last exhalation
in Granada. The self is transfigured into The ‘Red Indian’s’ Penultimate Speech
and into murdered Iraq,
this most contemporary of graves, O stone of the soul, our silence!
Throughout the two books, the oscillation between the I
and the we,
the private and the public, is maintained in tension, in abeyance. And by the end, Darwish questions himself and his aesthetic: The dead will not forgive those who stood, like us, perplexed / at the edge of the well asking: Was Joseph the Sumerian our brother, our / beautiful brother, to snatch the planets of this beautiful evening from him?
It is the same beautiful Joseph (son of Jacob) who saw eleven planets, the sun, and the moon prostrate before [him]
in the Quran, and it is the same past-future elegy of exile and expulsion, circling around to those other sadly beautiful planets at the end of the Andalusian scene.
Yet Darwish triumphs over the void with song: O water, be a string to my guitar
and open two windows on shadow street
because April will come out of our sleep soon
with the first almond blossom.
I See What I Want marks the first mature presence of the Sufi aesthetic in Darwish’s oeuvre, where he will disassemble and reassemble his language, again and again, in an idea of return: wind, horse, wheat, well, dove, gazelle, echo, holm oak, anemones, chrysanthemum, or something more recognizably biographical, like prison
in Israeli jails. In this recurrence and retreatment, in seating and unseating absence, Darwish is a prodigal between memory and history who extroverts language and the need to say: Good Morning.
Through the process, he attains illumination, not as a fixed and defined state but as the arrival at one truth constantly examined and replaced with another. Take Care of the Stags, Father
is an elegy to his father, where the father, the I,
the grandfather, and the forefather intertwine and dissolve time, place, and identity like anemones that adopt the land and sing her as a house for the sky.
The private and psychological detail is abundant: Darwish’s grandfather was his primary teacher; his father became an endlessly broken man who toiled as a hired laborer on land he owned before the creation of Israel in 1948; the horse he left behind to keep the house company
when they fled was lost; and the cactus
that grows on the site of each ruined Palestinian village punctures the heart.
All these details and themes and more are a personal representation first and foremost. Yet the echo resounds a larger collective memory, Palestinian or otherwise. Darwish’s fathers resembled, by chance,
the fathers of hundreds of thousand others, and his I
also resembled another’s. History is broken with an earth that cracks its eggshell and swims between us / green beneath the clouds.
And exile
is a land of words the pigeons carry to the pigeons,
just as the self is an exile of incursions speech delivers to speech.
And the poem is ever present: Why,
What good is the poem? / It raises the ceiling of our caves and flies from our blood to the language of doves.
Take Care of the Stags, Father
is also a praise for chrysanthemum,
an account of Darwish’s profound relationship with the earth, where a different specificity
and dailiness
is filtered, captured, through presence and absence. Darwish was a green
poet whose verse was shaped by flowers, trees, and animals the way people see them: without story / the lemon blossom is born out of the lemon blossom
; as well as through the dispossessed landscape: a return
within and without progress.
The beautifully measured exegesis of Truce with the Mongols by the Holm Oak Forest,
and its epiphora of holm oak,
confirms the formal, thematic, and structural range in these two collections. The mesmerizing prescience in Truce,
however, is alarming. Peace is able to envision itself but, like Cassandra or Tiresias, is either punished or discredited. Thus The Tragedy of Narcissus the Comedy of Silver
follows in monumental footsteps. Whether in its several stanzaic forms, as an early precursor of Mural, or in its undulation between elegy and praise, history and myth, absurdity and distress, this epic must be read with attention to its ubiquitous nuance, its Ulysses / of paradox,
its Sufi [who] sneaks away from a woman
then asks, Does the soul have buttocks and a waist and a shadow?
Circumstantially, as noted, the poem is linked to the birth of the first Palestinian Intifada, a stone scratching the sun.
And if this stone radiating our mystery
will provide fodder for many, for both sides of the trench,
who are drawn to the political
in Darwish’s poetry and life, Darwish offers a reply: Extreme clarity is a mystery.
Darwish wrote not a manifesto for return but a myth of return—where the exiles and displaced used to know, and dream, and return, and dream, and know, and return, / and return, and dream, and dream, and return.
Bygones are bygones
: they returned / from the myths of defending citadels to what is simple in speech.
No harm befell the land
despite those who immortalized their names with spear or mangonel … and departed,
since none of them deprived April of its habits.
And land, like language, is inherited.
And exile is the birds that exceed the eulogy of their songs.
Yet victims don’t believe their intuition
and don’t recognize their names.
Our history is their history,
their history is our history.
Darwish asks if anyone managed to fashion his narrative far from the rise of its antithesis and heroism
and answers: No one.
Still he pleads, O hero within us … don’t rush,
and stay far from us so we can walk in you toward another ending, the beginning is damned.
Such an ending would find itself in The Hoopoe.
(And just as the two volumes I See What I Want and Eleven Planets are twins, The Tragedy of Narcissus the Comedy of Silver
and The Hoopoe
are twins.) Both poems are tragedies in verse. Threading the dream of return, The Hoopoe
suspends arrival right from the start: We haven’t approached the land of our distant star yet.
And despite the incessant remonstrance and the litany of pretexts by the collective voice in wandering—Are we the skin of the earth?
No sword remains that hasn’t sheathed itself in our flesh
—the hoopoe insists on simply guiding to a lost sky,
to vastness after vastness after vastness,
and urges us to cast the place’s body
aside, because the universe is smaller than a butterfly’s wing in the courtyard of the large heart.
The Hoopoe
is based on the twelfth-century Sufi narrative epic poem Conference of the Birds, by Farid Addin al-Attar of Nishapur. In it a hoopoe leads all birds to the One, who turns out to be all the birds who managed to complete the journey and reach attainment. There are seven wadis on the path to attainment, the last of which is the Wadi of Vanishing, whose essence is Forgetfulness (a visible theme in Darwish’s late
poems). Darwish transforms this Sufi doctrine about God as an internal and not an external reality, a self inseparable from its other, to address exile and the (meta)physicality of identity in a work that is nothing short of a