Understanding Chinese Women

HOME
WELCOME
GUIDE
FREE EBOOK
MKL Q&A Forums
ARTICLES
NEWEST INFO
FEATURES
SITE SECTIONS
USER MENU
REGISTER/LOGIN
ABOUT
SITE INFO
Share
Member Login
Last Updated on 24 November 2011
Professional advice
when you need it
Click Here
Section II: Living in China continuedDating, Sex, and Relationships
Understanding Chinese Women

What We Use in China
Most foreign men, prior to visiting Chinaparticularly ones who have never dated an Asian girl beforehold a
stereotype of Chinese women that portrays them as these soft, demure, reserved, shy, alluring, and near
ethereal-like "creatures." What Western men encounter instead is often something much closer to the polar
opposite. Although it is difficult, if not nearly impossible, to generalize about women from any specific country or
culture, there is a great deal of strong anecdotal evidence, as well as data from a few empirical research studies,
to suggest that many Chinese women do share certain culturally-influenced and induced characteristics.
This unit will attempt to describe and explain the various factors at play that influence the psychosocial
development of women in China today and how these express themselves in relationships with men.
Psychology of Chinese Women

When a son is born,
Let him sleep on the bed,
Clothe him with fine clothes,
And give him jade to play...
When a daughter is born,
Let her sleep on the ground,
Wrap her in common wrappings,
And give broken tiles to play...
From the Book of Songs (1000 700 B.C.)
Confucian Tradition
Confucian philosophy and doctrine still very much influence values and beliefs in current day China. According to
Confucius, relationships among family members must follow a hierarchy of status according to generation, age,
and gender. The elder family members hold a higher position than do younger members and men are absolutely
superior to women (Baker, 1979). The enormous social importance of the relative status of each family member
by age, gender, and generation is reflected in the Chinese language itself: There are no less than 52 different
words in Mandarin used to describe family kinship as opposed to just 17 in English (Huang and Jia, 2008).
Historically in China, only the number of a man's sons would be used to refer to the size of his family. When a
woman married, she was expected to leave her family to live with her husband in his hometown, where the wife
was subordinate to the whims of her mother-in-law. In many non-urban regions of China, not much has changed.
It wasn't until the year 1912, after the revolution of Sun Yat-Sen, that the binding of womens feet was banned
but that practice continued unofficially throughout the countryside well into the 50s, until Chairman Mao
eradicated it for good. One scholar estimates that 40 to 50% of Chinese women during the 19th century had their
feet bound and, for the upper classes, that figure was as high as 100% (Lim, 2007). Certainly, one can still find
women alive in China today whose feet were bound some 60 to 90 years ago.
It is undoubtedly true that many Chinese women today enjoy new personal freedoms that were previously, up
until very recently, denied to them. But in mainland China, what is a matter of law does not necessarily equate to
what is experienced as a matter of practice in day-to-day life. A country's

four-thousand-year-old culturally-ingrained regard for its women cannot be
eradicated overnight no matter how many changes and improvements in law
are promulgated by its government.
One of the many latent effects of China's 1979 single child policy has been
the ongoing selective abortion of female fetuses and, at best, the withholding
of medical treatment from sick female infants in the countryside. It has been
estimated that there are 120 men for every 100 women in China (Fragoso,
2007) and that ratio is even steeper in the more rural regions of China. In the
absence of a significant social welfare infrastructure, a son is a parents' best
if not onlyassurance for security in their old age.
One woman kills herself every four minutes in China and, according to the
World Health Organization, it is the only country in the world where more
women commit suicide than men (Allen, 2006). Two of the main reasons cited
A woman still alive in 2006 with bound feet
for this finding are the profound discrepancy in social status as well as the relatively high rate of domestic
violence that women in China endure. Surveys conducted by the United Nations Development Fund for Women
found that 35% of all women in China had been the victims of domestic violence and that China ranks 81 out of
177 listed countries in the Gender Development Index (2007). As a matter of social policy, domestic violence is
primarily regarded in China as a private family affair and the authorities are reluctant, at best, to intervene.
Particularly for poor and uneducated women in China, suicide is perceived as the only way to extricate
themselves from a miserable existence.
Do You Think I'm Pretty?

To further complicate and aggravate matters, women in China are evaluated on physical appearance and overall
attractiveness against standards of beauty that are based primarily on Western (European) facial features.
According to numerous news media reports as well as an online
survey conducted by www.sina.com involving more than 5,000
respondents,
Chinese
standards
of
female
attractiveness
emphasize height (165 to 170cm), an oval face, long straight hair,

wafer-like thinness, a pale complexion, a complete absence of
moles and freckles, large eyes with a double-fold or crease in the
eyelids, and a pronounced bridge of the nose (China Daily, 2005;
Chen, 2008). Unfortunately, most of these features are not
characteristically Chinese at all. The average height of Chinese
Young Mongolian woman undergoes a double-eyelid
blepharoplasty
women is 160cm (about 5' 3") as compared to 170cm (about 5' 7")
for Chinese men.
In their quest to attain these features, more than 20,000 Chinese women flocked to just one public hospital in
Shanghai alone over the course of a single year for cosmetic surgical procedures that mostly included
blepharoplasty (eyelid surgery), rhinoplasty (nose job), malar augmentation (cheek implants), and augmentation
mammoplasty (ABC News, 2008). In the latest statistics released by the Chinese government in 2005, it was
estimated that US$2.4 billion dollars is spent annually on cosmetic surgery in China and that number has risen
each year subsequent to China's removal of the ban on plastic surgery in 2001 (Chen, 2008).
In what is an annual multi-billion dollar industry, more than half of all Asians (mostly women), aged 25 to 34 years,
use skin whiteners on a regular basis (CNN.com, 2002). The Chinese preference for clear, white or pale skin is
pervasive and ubiquitous and, as such, Chinese women avoid exposure to the sun whenever possible and most
carry parasols with them during the summer months (you will even see women riding bicycles with a parasol in
one hand). For this reason primarily, you will rarely observe Chinese arriving at pools or the seaside before 5:00
p.m., i.e., when the sun begins to set. In addition, eating disorders, particularly bulimia nervosa (binge eating
followed by purging), are increasing in prevalence in China at an alarming rate, especially among girls from higher
income families aged 12 to 22 (Chen and Jackson, 2007). A revealing human interest story featured on the AllChina Women's Federation website about two American-born Chinese (ABC) girls studying in Beijing, highlights
their difficulties adjusting to cultural differences in regard to both weight and skin tone. The article notes that
whereas both girls wore small sizes in the United States, in China they are considered "fat" (and are readily told
so by both friends and casual acquaintances) and can only fit into large sizes (Martin, 2007). Whereas their skin
tone would be considered healthy-looking by American standards, here they are both regarded as being way too
"dark."
What all of this amounts to is that the vast majority of Chinese

women are extremely insecure about their physical appearance, far
more so than their Western counterparts. There is incredible social
pressure on Chinese women to be extremely thin and those who
don't meet their culture's nearly unattainable standards of beauty are
reminded of it constantlyby parents, friends, teachers, and
commercial
advertisements
that
conspicuously
feature
either
Western models or those of Eurasian ancestry. Young women who

are considered too dark will spend what little money they earn to
purchase whitening creams and those who can afford to do so will
seek "corrective" plastic surgery (which, by the way, includes
hymenorraphy, i.e., surgical restoration of the hymen). In fact, plastic
surgery has become so pervasive and common in China today, the
country actually hosted its first beauty pageant in 2004 specifically
for women who are now considered to be beautiful as a direct result
of these various cosmetic procedures, i.e., a pageant for former
Chinese actress Zhang Ziyi, voted one of the world's most

beautiful women by People Magazine, is considered "so-so" or
a "little ugly" by most Chinese
cosmetic surgery patients only (ABC News, 2008).

There is no doubt that Western and Chinese men maintain very different criteria for determining what constitutes
a pretty Chinese girl, and this is actually one of the reasons behind some Chinese girls' attraction to foreign men.
Obviously, if you are considered a "little ugly" by men of your own culture and then you come across a Western
man who sincerely views and treats you as beautiful, it is understandable that the woman will be highly flattered,
perhaps even grateful, and attracted in turn. The cultural difference in perception regarding what constitutes a
pretty Chinese girl is so pronounced that one can actually find a public discussion among Chinese men on the
China Daily forum titled "Do Foreign Men Have Ugly Chinese Girlfriends?"
As a further illustration, in 2001, People magazine voted young Chinese actress Zhang Ziyi as one of the 50 most
beautiful people in the world. However, when Peng Bo, president of the Shanghai Time Cosmetic Surgery
Hospital, was asked to comment on Zhang's title and whether he personally considered her to be beautiful, he
refused to give a direct answer to the question. Instead, he replied "I would only say her face is up to the
standard of beauty. Zhang's job requires that she has to be assertive" (China Daily, 2005). In other words,
according to at least one director of a cosmetic surgery center in China, Zhang does not qualify as one of the 50
most beautiful people in the world in 2001 as she just meets the standard of "beauty," and has a look that he
apparently regards as too "assertive" or hard in appearance. Therefore, it is not surprising at all that Zhang Ziyi
would eventually find herself a foreign boyfriend (multimillionaire Vivi Nevo). Obviously, if a young Chinese movie
star of international acclaim for her beauty cannot pass muster in China, there isn't much hope here for the
majority of women. And, in fact, this partially explains how Western men fit into the picture.
Summary
Day-to-day life in China is not easy for anyone, but it is fair to say that it is far more difficult for women than it is
for men. Especially following the advent of the 1979 single-child policy, girls in China face a very unusual set of
culture-specific dynamics unknown to the same degree in other societies. On one hand, their arrival into this
world will be met with profound disappointment, especially by their fathers who may regard and resent them as a
lost opportunity to perpetuate the family name, and both parents will fear an uncertain future in their old age. On
the other hand, as their only child, they will still be, nevertheless, terribly pampered and spoiled. This particular
constellation of factors results in an ideal cultural environment for producing an entire generation of women with
profound narcissistic injury, i.e., women who suffer from a sense of constitutional damage coupled with an
extreme sense of entitlement.
The following unit will describe and discuss in detail the two types of pathological narcissism, as well as the
compensatory behaviors of control and dominance, that are common among many women in China.
Related Articles/Chapters
Having a Baby in China for Foreigners...
Traveling With, Buying, and Raising Pets in China...
Experiencing and Dealing with Culture Shock in China...

Personal and Public Hygiene in China...
Modes of Transportation in China for Foreign Teachers...
About Us
Partners
Most Popular
Middle Kingdom Life is the premier awardwinning
educational
website
for
Dating Etiquette and Sexual Relationships in China
foreign
teachers and Western expats in China. It was

founded
by
an
American
professor
in
psychology and sociology for the purpose of

disseminating valid and reliable information
about living and teaching in China. The site's
mission is to protect and enhance the
interests
and
social
welfare
of
teachers and Western expats in China.
Understanding Chinese Women
foreign
Website
administrators
are
Introduction to Dating, Sex and Relationships in China
invited to partner-up with MKL.

Our link directory supports text
Narcissistic Types Among Chinese Women
links or banners and features

thumbnail photos of your home
Foreign Teachers Guide to Living and Working in China
page.
Understanding Chinese Women's Attraction to Foreign Men
Read More
Add Link
China's Education System, Chinese Students, and the

Foreign English Teacher
Privacy Statement | Terms of Use | Posting Policy | Advertise with Us

2007 - 2013 Middle Kingdom Life, All International Rights Reserved
Unauthorized Reproduction and Distribution Are Strictly Prohibited
Copyright Notification

Understanding Chinese Women

Uploaded by

Copyright:

Available Formats

Understanding Chinese Women

Uploaded by

Document Information

Copyright

Available Formats

Share this document

Share or Embed Document

Sharing Options

Did you find this document useful?

Is this content inappropriate?

Copyright:

Available Formats

Understanding Chinese Women

Uploaded by

Copyright:

Available Formats

What are some of the cultural factors that influence Chinese women's psychosocial development?

What are some of the cultural factors that influence Chinese women's psychosocial development?

How does Confucian philosophy still influence values and beliefs in China today?

How does Confucian philosophy still influence values and beliefs in China today?

HOME

MKL Q&A Forums

Last Updated on 24 November 2011

Section II: Living in China continuedDating, Sex, and Relationships

Understanding Chinese Women

Psychology of Chinese Women

what is experienced as a matter of practice in day-to-day life. A country's

A woman still alive in 2006 with bound feet

Do You Think I'm Pretty?

emphasize height (165 to 170cm), an oval face, long straight hair,

What all of this amounts to is that the vast majority of Chinese

Western models or those of Eurasian ancestry. Young women who

Chinese actress Zhang Ziyi, voted one of the world's most

cosmetic surgery patients only (ABC News, 2008).

Experiencing and Dealing with Culture Shock in China...

Middle Kingdom Life is the premier awardwinning

Dating Etiquette and Sexual Relationships in China

teachers and Western expats in China. It was

psychology and sociology for the purpose of

teachers and Western expats in China.

Understanding Chinese Women

Introduction to Dating, Sex and Relationships in China

invited to partner-up with MKL.

Narcissistic Types Among Chinese Women

links or banners and features

Foreign Teachers Guide to Living and Working in China

China's Education System, Chinese Students, and the

Privacy Statement | Terms of Use | Posting Policy | Advertise with Us

You might also like