DECKOF

THE

DADDY THiNGS

FROM THE CREATORS OF

Hey Doodlers, The OG Deck
Thanks so much for buying (or if you’re cool, stealing) (as interpreted by a bunch of podcast hosts)
this copy of The Deck of Daddy Things. The deck
that sits before you is meant to inject an extra, dad- 1. Vizier - Within a year of drawing this
sized dose of chaos into your roleplaying adventures!
card, you can ask the DM any ques-
We’ve included the classic cards from the infamous tion you want and receive an honest
deck you know and love from The Most Popular
Roleplaying Game On Earth Whose Name Rhymes With answer. The DM can't screw you over
Bunions And Baggins™, but if you wanna get really with a tricky answer, either: they tell you
rowdy -- and if you’re holding this deck, we know
you’re all about getting rowdy -- you should definitely everything you need to know to solve
use our custom set of Daddy Cards instead of, or in whatever problem you're facing.
addition to, the OG Deck.
The twenty-two Daddy Cards are designed to 2. Sun - You gain 50,000 XP and a
introduce silly, fun, improvisational play into your random Wondrous item.
tabletop group.
Are they balanced? Absolutely not. Will they hopefully 3. Moon - You can cast the "Wish" spell
elicit a few belly laughs from your players? We hope 1d3 times. You are now cursed to spend
so! the next hour arguing about the exact
So, yeah -- roll with the original twenty-two cards wording of the "Wish" spell.
(1 - 22, labeled with this nifty icon: ), or play with
the Daddy Cards (23 - 44, labeled with this icon: ),
or mix-and-match cards into a chaotic mishmash of
4. Star - Increase one of your Ability
possible fates - the choice is yours! Scores by 2, up to a limit of 24. Whoop-
Just don’t come crying to us when your campaign
dee-doo.
gets derailed! Or wait, actually, do come crying to us.
Tweet us at @dungeonsanddads and we’ll apologize 5. Comet - If you singlehandedly kill the
and/or laugh at your misfortune! next hostile creature you meet, you level
- Anthony, Matt, Beth, Will, and Freddie up. If you can convince a squirrel or
whatever to fight you, that counts. race as you and serves you loyally until
death, believing the fates have drawn
6. The Fates - You can avoid or erase them to you. You control this character,
a single event as if it never happened. so better tell your fellow players to not
You can do this right now or at any other get too attached or anything.
point before you die. If you use this to
avoid drawing from the Deck in the first 10. Gem - Fifty gems, altogether worth
place, you're a wuss. 50,000 GP, appear at your feet. Congrat-
ulations! Now you get to argue with your
7. Throne - You gain proficiency in friends about what to do with it all!
Persuasion and double your proficien-
cy bonus in it. More importantly, you 11. Talons - Every magic item in your
now own a small keep somewhere in possession turns to dust. If you have
the world. The keep is currently in the an Artifact, whatever the hell that is, it
hands of monsters you have to clear out vanishes but isn't destroyed. As if that
in order to properly claim the keep as makes a difference.
your own.
12. The Void - Uh oh! Your soul gets
8. Key - A Magic Weapon that you are sucked from your body and placed into
proficient with, at least of "Rare" quality, an object of the DM's choice, guarded
is chosen by the DM and appears in your by one or more powerful beings. Your
hands. Boring. soulless body is incapacitated and falls
in a funny way. A "Wish" spell can reveal
9. Knight - You gain the service of a where your soul container is.
4th-level Fighter who shows up within
30 feet of you. The Fighter is the same 13. Flames - You piss off a demon
for some reason. It only wants to ruin (so you're naked in the orb). You remain
your life, and will spend the rest of its in the orb until you are found and
existence attempting to do so. This removed from it. You can be located by
dickishness only ends when either you a "Wish" spell. Stop drawing cards.
or the demon dies.
17. Ruin - You lose everything other than
14. Skull - An Avatar of Death appears your magic items. Money, property,
in front of you and demands you 1v1 clothing, all of it.
it. If you drop it to zero hit points, you
live. If you drop to zero hit points, you 18. Euryale - You cursed, son. You have
die forever and can never be revived. If a -2 penalty on all Saving Throws until
anyone tries to help you, they summon a god or the "Fates" card undoes the
their own Avatar of Death. The Avatar of curse.
Death should probably look like an NPC
19 . Rogue - The DM chooses or creates
you wronged in the past, but that's up to
an NPC who becomes hostile toward
the DM. The internet has the stat block
you. You won't know who the hostile NPC
for an Avatar of Death.
is until the NPC, or someone else who
15. Idiot - Permanently lose 1d4 + 1 knows about their animosity, reveals
intelligence (down to a minimum of 1). that fact. You can only end the hostility
You can draw another card. with a "Wish" spell or the help of a god.

16. Donjon - You get bamfed away and 20. Balance - Your Alignment inverts.
placed inside a weird orb of negative If you're cool, you become a dick, and
space. As you are bamfed, you drop vice versa. If you're a centrist, nothing
everything you are wearing and carrying changes.
21. Fool - Lose 10,000 XP, discard this recognize game and you take a +1 to all
card, and draw from the deck again. Charisma checks.
You can't actually lose a level from this
XP loss, which makes this card kind of 25. Dadbod - You are cursed/blessed
pointless imo but whatev. with a powerful dad bod. Gain +1 on all
Strength checks, but -1 on all Stealth
22. Jester - You either gain 10,000 XP, checks as you now audibly grunt during
or you can draw two more cards. Maybe any form of physical exertion. A roll of
just take the XP, though. 2 or lower on any Strength check will
cause your back to "give out" requiring
The Daddy Cards two successive long rests to heal. You
may "push through the pain" by rolling
23. Ask Your Mother - The player may
a D20. A roll of a 5 or lower throws your
invalidate any one ruling made by the
back out, and requires the attention of a
DM. Upon invocation, the player may call
skilled magic user or physical therapist
or text another DM of their choice (or
to heal. Your sneezes now also inflict
their actual mother) who may be more
1 psychic damage to anyone within a
sympathetic to their cause. The ruling
30-foot radius.
of this alternate DM is final.
26. Donjuan - You must, upon encoun-
24. Birkensocks - Socks and sandals
tering any new person or creature,
magically materialize onto your feet,
attempt to seduce them. Rolling a 5 or
replacing any footwear you current
lower means they will slap you (surprise
have. Take a permanent -2 to all
unarmed strike) and immediately begin
Charisma checks, unless you're dealing
combat. This effect only ends when
with another dad, in which case, game
you marry one of the objects of your uating temperature, and lighting and
seduction. maintaining fires.
27. Ganbatte - A strange metal chariot 30. Mask - Toxic masculinity infects you
blinks into existence before your eyes. like a disease. You have disadvantage
This object functions exactly like a 2013 on all skill checks, and you cannot cast
Honda Odyssey minivan with a full tank any spells, until you -- the person who
of gas. "Speak with Animals" will allow drew this card, not the character -- cry
you to communicate with the vehicle, real tears. The tears can be elicited
who has the personality of a tsundere via non-emotional means (onions, hot
anime character. peppers), but only after all available
emotional means (sad films, probing
28. giB - You become a child trapped in conversation, Thai life insurance com-
an adult's body. You maintain all of your mercials) have been attempted.
memories, intelligence, and wisdom, but
your strength is halved. Failure to speak 31. Isekai - This card spells doom for
like a child will result in an immediate your DM. Suddenly, a vortex opens in
d4 of damage. the sky above your entire party. You,
and all your belongings, are sucked into
29. Grillmaster - The ancient BBQ gods a trans-dimensional void and spat out
bestow their occult, powerful knowledge into Earth, in the 21st century. Though
upon you. Permanently gain +4 to all you and your party can speak the native
ability checks when applied to cook- language, everything else is terrifying
ing, grilling, identifying and evaluating and unusual to you. You can only return
meats and animals, smoking meats, home by finding and breaching a hidden
creating sauces and marinades, eval-
portal to your original realm. The portal 34. Maury - A strange child appears
can be hidden anywhere on planet to you, claiming that you are their
Earth, and is guarded by at least ten parent. They do, in fact, bear a striking
million dollars worth of security. resemblance to you, and any paternity
magic will reveal that they are a blood
32. Kneeslapper - From now on, relative. You are now legally and morally
whenever you make a dad joke, you responsible for this child.
immediately deal 1d4 psychic damage to
anyone who hears it. Dad jokes must be 35. Pupper - The cutest and handsom-
made in-character. est dog in the history of the universe
appears in front of you. He loves every
33. Massage Throne - A magical single person in your party, and will
throne, upholstered in the finest calf always endeavor to help you out and be
leather and handmade by the expert adorable. The first player to say "aww,"
dwarven artisans, appears before or "I love you," or attempt to give the
you. This chair conforms to the body dog a name will immediately become
shape of any creature seated in it, and heart-bonded to the dog, such that if
using a combination of arcane rollers, the dog ever dies, they will simultane-
divine heating pads, and high-intensity ously die of heartbreak. The dog will
percussive elements, will instantly always be the priority target of at least
restore the user's HP and grant them one enemy in every single combat so
a temporary +1 to all Dexterity checks long as he is alive.
until their next long rest. However, this
chair weighs several tons, and is very 36. Rich Dad, Poor Dad - You find your
difficult to move. ego inexorably linked with your ability to
tender payment for goods and services. ball-based sports. Additionally, you find
Any monetary transactions that occur yourself drawn powerfully to any and all
within 50 ft. of you will now cause you sporting events, and are unable to con-
to forcefully intercede, declare "This trol an impulse to berate and scream at
one's on me!" and pay the associated any referees, officiants, coaches, and
amount (regardless of your ability to coaching staff present.
actually do so).
39. Strapped - A metallic weapon
37. Skipper - You now possess a sea- appears in your hands. Inscribed on the
worthy vessel (which you must name) side is the number "1911." This functions
capable of carrying 8 human-sized as a ranged weapon with the following
creatures docked in the nearest body stats: +3 to hit; 3d10 piercing damage; 8
of water. This boat is very important to rounds of ammunition, which can never
you. Immediately lose all your money be replenished.
and from now on you must pay upkeep
and docking fees (amount and frequen- 40. The Deck of Many Things - For-
cy as determined by the DM, but bear in tune smiles upon you. Suddenly, a large
mind that boat ownership is legendarily wood deck -- like the kind attached to
expensive). You may not sell this boat, a house -- appears underneath your
but on the bright side - you have a boat! feet. Resting on the deck are: 1,000
GP; 1 Wondrous Item; enough building
38. Sportscentered - Your inherent supplies with which to construct a
competitive nature causes you to log cabin; a keg of ale; a barbecue; a
be consumed with an overwhelming gym bag of holding (which has infinite
desire to observe and form opinions on space, but only for sporting equipment
-- anything else gets spat out); and one permanent disadvantage on any two of
piece of equipment from every conceiv- the following: Wisdom checks, Intelli-
able sport. gence checks, or Charisma checks.
41. Friday - A small cookie appears that, 43. You're My Real Dad - All players
when bitten by two different creatures, must refer to the DM as "daddy" for the
will cause those two creatures to swap foreseeable future, even out of game.
bodies after the next long rest. If the The first player who fails to do so will
cookie is consumed by a single crea- lose a full character level. After this, the
ture, that creatures gains back +1 HP players need no longer refer to the DM
and nothing else happens. as "daddy."*
*Y’all, be cool here - consent is the name of the game and it’s only fun if
42. Thomas - Your party is suddenly everyone’s having fun. if people don’t want to do this, don’t make them.

transported to an unfamiliar forest

at least a hundred miles away from 44. Father Knows Best - You recall
their current objective. Five successful knowledge gained from watching an
15+ survival rolls will get you back on episode of a documentary series many
track, or they can ask a single NPC for years ago, which of course makes you
directions. Every failed survival roll an expert! After describing to the party
causes the party to enter into progres- what the documentary you watched
sively more and more difficult combat was, this card gives you permanent
encounters. Asking an NPC for direc- advantage on any checks dealing with
tions will immediately grant the party the subject matter of said documentary.
the opportunity to head back to their
original objective, but will also cause
License containing Open Game Content except as expressly licensed in another, independent Agreement
with the owner of such Trademark or Registered Trademark. The use of any Product Identity in
Notice of Open Game Content Open Game Content does not constitute a challenge to the ownership of that Product Identity. The
The Deck of Daddy Things uses Open Game Content. The Deck of Daddy Things contains owner of any Product Identity used in Open Game Content shall retain all rights, title and interest
text describing the Deck of Many Things from the Open Gaming License Version 1.0a, System in and to that Product Identity.
Reference Document 5.1. 8. Identification: If you distribute Open Game Content You must clearly indicate which portions of
Open Game Content may only be Used under and in terms of the Open Gaming License Version the work that you are distributing are Open Game Content.
1.0a. 9. Updating the License: Wizards or its designated Agents may publish updated versions of this
The terms of the Open Gaming License Version 1.0a are as follows: License. You may use any authorized version of this License to copy, modify and distribute any
Open Game Content originally distributed under any version of this License.
OPEN GAME LICENSE Version 1.0a
10. Copy of this License: You MUST include a copy of this License with every copy of the Open
The following text is the property of Wizards of the Coast, Inc. and is Copyright 2000 Wizards of Game Content You Distribute.
the Coast, Inc (“Wizards”). All Rights Reserved.
11. Use of Contributor Credits: You may not market or advertise the Open Game Content using the
1. Definitions: (a) ”Contributors” means the copyright and/or trademark owners who have name of any Contributor unless You have written permission from the Contributor to do so.
contributed Open Game Content; (b) ”Derivative Material” means copyrighted material including
derivative works and translations (including into other computer languages), potation, modifi- 12. Inability to Comply: If it is impossible for You to comply with any of the terms of this License
cation, correction, addition, extension, upgrade, improvement, compilation, abridgment or other with respect to some or all of the Open Game Content due to statute, judicial order, or govern-
form in which an existing work may be recast, transformed or adapted; (c) “Distribute” means to mental regulation then You may not Use any Open Game Material so affected
reproduce, license, rent, lease, sell, broadcast, publicly display, transmit or otherwise distribute; 13. Termination: This License will terminate automatically if You fail to comply with all terms here-
(d) ”Open Game Content” means the game mechanic and includes the methods, procedures, in and fail to cure such breach within 30 days of becoming aware of the breach. All sublicenses
processes and routines to the extent such content does not embody the Product Identity and is shall survive the termination of this License.
an enhancement over the prior art and any additional content clearly identified as Open Game
Content by the Contributor, and means any work covered by this License, including translations 14. Reformation: If any provision of this License is held to be unenforceable, such provision shall
and derivative works under copyright law, but specifically excludes Product Identity. (e) “Product be reformed only to the extent necessary to make it enforceable.
Identity” means product and product line names, logos and identifying marks including trade
dress; artifacts; creatures characters; stories, storylines, plots, thematic elements, dialogue, 15. COPYRIGHT NOTICE Open Game License v1.0a Copyright 2000, Wizards of the Coast, Inc.
incidents, language, artwork, symbols, designs, depictions, liketnesses, formats, poses, concepts, System Reference Document 5.0 Copyright 2016, Wizards of the Coast, Inc.; Authors Mike Mearls,
themes and graphic, photographic and other visual or audio representations; names and Jeremy Crawford, Chris Perkins, Rodney Thompson, Peter Lee, James Wyatt, Robert J. Schwalb,
descriptions of characters, spells, enchantments, personalities, teams, personas, likenesses and Bruce R. Cordell, Chris Sims, and Steve Townshend, based on original material by E. Gary Gygax
special abilities; places, locations, environments, creatures, equipment, magical or supernatural and Dave Arneson.
abilities or effects, logos, symbols, or graphic designs; and any other trademark or registered
trademark clearly identified as Product identity by the owner of the Product Identity, and which END OF LICENSE
specifically excludes the Open Game Content; (f) “Trademark” means the logos, names, mark, sign,
motto, designs that are used by a Contributor to identify itself or its products or the associated Product Identity
products contributed to the Open Game License by the Contributor (g) “Use”, “Used” or “Using” The following items are designated Product Identity, as defined in Section 1(e) of the Open Gaming
means to use, Distribute, copy, edit, format, modify, translate and otherwise create Derivative License Version 1.0a and are subject to the conditions set forth in Section 78 of the Open Gaming
Material of Open Game Content. (h) “You” or “Your” means the licensee in terms of this agreement. License, and are not Open Content:
Not for resale. Permission granted to print or photocopy this document for personal use only.
System Reference Document 5.0 2 All artwork, including but not limited to, works created by Kat Curwin and RocketJump, Inc.
2. The License: This License applies to any Open Game Content that contains a notice indicating RocketJump, Inc. branding, including but not limited to, logos, trademarks, graphic design,
that the Open Game Content may only be Used under and in terms of this License. You must affix layouts, and identifying marks.
such a notice to any Open Game Content that you Use. No terms may be added to or subtracted The Deck of Daddy Things branding, including but not limited to, logos, trademarks, graphic
from this License except as described by the License itself. No other terms or conditions may be design, layouts, and identifying marks.
applied to any Open Game Content distributed using this License.
Dungeons and Daddies branding, including but not limited to, logos, trademarks, graphic design,
3. Offer and Acceptance: By Using the Open Game Content You indicate Your acceptance of the layouts, and identifying marks.
terms of this License.
Graphic design elements of The Deck of Daddy Things, including but not limited to, layouts, box
4. Grant and Consideration: In consideration for agreeing to use this License, the Contributors design, graphics,m and iconography.
grant You a perpetual, worldwide, royalty-free, nonexclusive license with the exact terms of this
License to Use, the Open Game Content. All text created by RocketJump, Inc. not found in the Open Gaming License Version 1.0a, System
Reference Document 5.1 found at the internet link: https://media.wizards.com/2016/downloads/
5. Representation of Authority to Contribute: If You are contributing original material as Open SRD-OGL_V1.1.pdf
Game Content, You represent that Your Contributions are Your original creation and/or You have
sufficient rights to grant the rights conveyed by this License. Promotional materials for the Deck of Daddy Things and Dungeons and Daddies, including but not
limited to, video, animation, and social media content.
6. Notice of License Copyright: You must update the COPYRIGHT NOTICE portion of this License to
include the exact text of the COPYRIGHT NOTICE of any Open Game Content You are copying, mod- All merchandise associated with Dungeons and Daddies, including but not limited to, enamel pins,
ifying or distributing, and You must add the title, the copyright date, and the copyright holder’s deck boxes, all information and artwork found on all cards, apparel, posters and prints.
name to the COPYRIGHT NOTICE of any original Open Game Content you Distribute.
Open Gaming Content
7. Use of Product Identity: You agree not to Use any Product Identity, including as an indication
as to compatibility, except as expressly licensed in another, independent Agreement with All content from the System Reference Document 5.1 is Open Game Content as described in
the owner of each element of that Product Identity. You agree not to indicate compatibility Section 1(d) of the License. No portion of this work other than the material designated as Open
or co-adaptability with any Trademark or Registered Trademark in conjunction with a work Game Content may be reproduced in any form without permission.
 Credits
Executive Producers
Matt Arnold, Anthony Burch, Will Campos,
Beth May, and Freddie Wong
Content Producer
Courtney Thérond

Community Manager
Ashley Nicollette

Art and Design

Kat Curwin

Writing
Matt Arnold, Anthony Burch, Will Campos,
Beth May, and Freddie Wong

Published by
RocketJump, Inc.
4361 Valley Blvd, Unit F9
Los Angeles, CA 90032

Printed in the United States. First printing: April 2021.

Copyright © 2021 RocketJump, Inc.
Dungeons and Daddies, their respective logos, illustrations,
writing, and characters distinct likenesses are property of
RocketJump, Inc. in Canada/US and other countries. Used with
permission. All rights reserved.
dungeonsanddaddies.com