Table etiquette

courtesy shown by good manners at meals.

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 Table manners reflect part of your personality to others;

makes eating a pleasant experience for everyone, most rules of etiquette involve common sense and consideration of other people.

Common Rules of Etiquette:

Sit down from the left side of your chair

Assist with passing of foods when appropriate; pass to the right

Passing stuff
If someone asks for something to be passed to him or her, only reach for it if you are the closest one to the item. In that case, take the one item and place it directly next to your neighbor. (Do not pass it hand-to-hand.) Continue passing the item in this manner until the original requester has the item. And oddly enough, you are not allowed to help yourself to the item until the original requester gets a chance at it (after all, (s)he asked first). When that person is done, you can ask the item to be passed back to you, and enjoy!

Napkin

 place on lap before starting to eat; cover your mouth and nose if you must cough or sneeze leave on your chair if leaving the table and returning during a meal

 Place the napkin on your lap after being seated. As needed, use it to gently wipe or dab your mouth. Before drinking from a glass, dab your mouth. During a restroom break, place the napkin to the left of the plate. At the end of the meal, the napkin is placed neatly to the right of the plate (not refolded, but not crumpled either).

 Turn off or silence all electronic devices before entering the restaurant. If you forgot to turn off your cell phone, and it rings, immediately turn it off. Do not answer the call.

 Wait until everyone is served before eating. If you are a guest, wait for the host to begin.

Salt and pepper

An additional note needs to be made about using salt and pepper: if someone asks you to pass the salt, do it in the same manner above, but pass BOTH the salt and pepper (even if only one of the two were asked for). NEVER use salt or pepper on your food until after you have already tasted it. It's a huge insult to the cook if you try to add flavor before even tasting it. don't ever season a dish that everyone is supposed to share (not with salt, pepper, catsup, parmesan cheese, not with anything). Keep your own creative additions to your own plate.

Posture

Always sit straight up in your chair, never leaning backward, nor forward.

Never let your elbows touch the table (though you can put your hands on the table all you want).

 Sit up straight, do not hunch over your plate

 Hands. You can place your wrists or forearms on the table, or hands on your lap

 Legs. Keep legs next to your chair. Do not stretch legs out or cross your legs as they may bump others under the table.

 Relax, dine slowly, and enjoy the meal and your company

If you apply basic principles of setting the table, table service and manners: you can create a pleasant atmosphere so that your relationships and appearance of food are enhanced. Good manners show respect for others. Besides eating, these things should also be taking place at the table: Communication via conversation Relationship development Values development (I care enough to spend time with you) Exchange of ideas

 Always say thank you when served something. Shows appreciation. Eat slowly, don't gobble up the food. Someone took a long time to prepare the food, enjoy it slowly. Slowly means to wait about 5 seconds after swallowing before getting another forkful.

Rude Dining Behaviors

Talking on Cell Phones

Cell phones should be turned off or on vibrate or silence during a meal. Never answer the call unless it is an emergency. If expecting an emergency call, let your table party know so that when you receive it, you can excuse yourself from the table and talk outside.

Chewing With Your Mouth Open

The mouth should be closed when chewing. ABC (already been chewed) is not an appetizing sight.

Talking With Mouth Full

When the mouth is full of food, wait to speak until you have swallowed the food. Again, it is not appetizing to see food and when talking with food in the mouth, some could accidentally get spit onto your guests.

Blowing Nose at the Dinner Table

It is very offensive and unsanitary to blow one's nose at the table. Excuse yourself and go to the restroom.

Being Rude to Server

Being rude or impolite to the server is unacceptable. If you do not like your food or wine, let the server know politely and they will get you a replacement. However, if you have finished your meal or wine, then you should not expect a replacement meal or drink.

Picking Your Teeth

If food is stuck in your teeth, then excuse yourself and go to the restroom.

don't pick something out of your teeth (just excuse yourself to the bathroom)

Burping

Sometimes burping may be unavoidable, but try to suppress it using your napkin.

Flatulence

Sometimes passing gas may be unavoidable, but try to suppress it. Squeeze the anal sphincter hard until the urge goes away.

"Embarrassing" Moments
Did you burp? Did you spill something? To handle these little unfortunate accidents, just try to channel the aura of James Bond and think: be classy, be classy, be classy. If anything comes out of your mouth other than speech (e.g., burp, hiccup, chicken nugget), just excuse yourself quietly (to nobody in particular), and put your napkin to your lips. This is a good time to talk about general napkin etiquette. Never smear your napkin all over your face, or wipe your mouth hard. Just use it to blot your mouth. But if you spill something,

then follow this ..

don't make a big deal of it

It happens. Just be calm, quietly apologize, try to prevent anything from spilling over onto the people sitting next to you with your napkin, and get a waiter to help you control the damage. If something spills onto someone's clothes, do NOT try to get it off his or her clothes. That's technically known as a "sexual harassment lawsuit waiting to happen." Point it out, let them clean it up, offer to pay the dry cleaning bill, and then let it go. Hey, as we all learned when we were two years old, accidents happen, and they can often be wet and messy. Just keep your cool.

Licking Fingers

If your fingers happen to get food on them, use your napkin to wipe them clean. Or, excuse yourself, and use the restroom to wash hands.

don't leave lipstick smears on anything

don't put crap on the table (meaning a purse, papers, keys)

Grooming or Touching Up Make Up

Although commonly seen in restaurants, the place to primp is in the restroom.

don't tilt or squirm in your chair

Over Indulging the Alcohol

It is uncouth to drink too much. It is also unhealthy to have too much alcohol and unsafe to drive. Even if you have a designated driver, alcohol tends to unleash obnoxious behavior.

Using your fingers

A big question regarding eating properly is when it's OK to use your fingers, and when you must use a utensil. While we provide a small list of finger foods, there is a

tip you can follow, which is...

If you're not sure whether or not you can eat something with your fingers, just use a utensil

As for foods that you can eat with your fingers, they include: sandwiches cookies small fruits or berries with stems french fries and potato chips hamburgers and hot dogs corn on the cob pickles Popadoms

Pacing The food is not going to walk away. So take your time! Don't fill your mouth with too much food. Try to keep the same eating pace as your host, so that you all finish at the same time. It is not a compliment when someone leans over and says "Boy, good thing you didn't eat the plate" or "Wanna finish some time before the next thaw?"

Not Leaving a Tip

Unless the service was unbearable, a 15% to 20% tip should be left. If the service was terrible, speak discretely with the restaurant manager.

The ABC's of Good Restaurant Manners

Answer an invitation within twentyfour hours.

Briefcases and handbags should be

placed out of the way and out of sight. Don't put them on the table or block the waiter's path.

Chew with your mouth closed and be

careful not to make any distracting noises.

Don't pass the salt without the

pepper.

Excuse yourself if you must leave. Fold

your napkin neatly and place it on your chair. Push your chair back into the table before you walk away.

Food should be tasted first. Then, if

you need to, use salt and pepper.

Grasp your wine glass with your

thumb and first two fingers cupping the bowl and your last two fingers lightly touching the stem.

Handle any cancellations yourself.

Don't have a secretary or assistant call for you. Make arrangement for another meeting promptly.

Inquiries will get you information. Ask

your host what's good at the restaurant and use his or her suggestions to determine a safe price range. For example, "The prime rib here is wonderful," means you don't have to worry about ordering an expensive item off the menu.

Just in case, call the morning of your

dinner engagement to confirm all details. Check the time, directions, dress code, etc.

Keep pace with your companions.

Skip a course if you are lagging behind. Slow down if you are bolting ahead.

Lipstick should be blotted

unobtrusively with a tissue before the meal. Don't leave marks on glasses or cups.

Mention any problems (if you drop

your fork, for example) to your host. It's your host's job to call the waiter to the table, not yours.

Napkins belong on your lap, not

tucked under your chin. When you're through with your meal, place your napkin to the left of your plate; never on a dirty dish.

Order last if you are the host. Help

your guests feel comfortable, however. Tell them about a good appetizer so they know it's okay to order a first course. Say "Order a cocktail if you like. I'm sticking with mineral water."

Place settings demystified: bread

plates to the left, liquids to the right; use the utensils farthest from the plate first and work inwards with each course.

Quench any desire to comb, smooth,

or even touch your hair.

Refrain from eating until the guest of

honor (seated to the host's right) begins. If you are the guest of honor, do not begin eating until everyone has been served. However, if the food is hot and the gathering is large or the service is slow, use your judgement.

Sit when the host gestures you

toward a seat. Don't just walk up and grab a place at the table. Likewise, if you're the host, plan where you'll seat your guest beforehand.

Toothpicks are not to be used in

front of your companions.

Utensils should not be placed on the

table between bites. Instead, balance them on the edge of your plate.

Vent about poor service, poor quality

food, etc., in a letter to the manager of the restaurant the next day. During dinner, however, don't make a scene that could make your guests feel uncomfortable. Simply say, "This restaurant isn't up to it usual high quality tonight," and leave it at that.

Wait for your hosts or guests if they

are late. Don't order a drink, unfold your napkin, or start eating the bread. The table should be clean when your companions arrive.

expect the host to pay the bill. Don't

argue when the bill comes.

Your mouth shouldn't be full of food

when you take a sip of wine or water. Chew, swallow, and then take a drink.

Zipper your mouth. Never, never,

never complain when you are the guest. If the food is terrible, grin and bear it. If you spot a bug on the wall, look the other way.

Good manners do more than show off your good upbringing. When you know and practice the rules of etiquette, you can relax in social situations. You don't need to nervously second guess your every move. That means you can concentrate on the business at hand and get the job done.

MEENU

MENU

Table manners play an important part in making a favorable impression. They are visible signals of the state of our manners and therefore are essential to professional success. Regardless of whether we are having lunch with a prospective employer or dinner with a business associate, our manners can speak volumes about us as professionals.

Dining Etiquette Tips to dine at ease: 1. Table settings are like road maps that guide you through the courses of a meal. 2. Forks (except the seafood fork), are placed to the left of the plate. 3. Glasses or crystal stem-ware are to the right of the dinner plate. 4. Knives and spoons are placed at the right side of the plate. 5. Remember the "etiquette rule", solids to the left, liquids to the right. 6. During the courses of a meal you pick up the silverware pieces from the outside in, toward your plate. 7. When hosting a dinner, don't forget your guest's special dietary needs. (Kosher or other religious observances, vegetarian, food allergies, etc.) 8. Do try a little of everything on your plate. 9. Napkins are to remain on your lap until the completion of the meal. 10. Do compliment the host/ess on the preparation, tastiness or presentation of the meal.

How to set a Table

A. Napkin B. Service Plate C. Soup Bowl D. Butter Plate/Butter Knife or Salad Plate E. Water Glass F. White Wine G. Red Wine
H. Fish Fork I. Dinner Fork J. Salad Fork K. Service Knife L. Fish Knife M. Soup Spoon N. Dessert Fork/Spoon

Plates: The dinner plate is placed directly in front of where your guest will be sitting. The salad plate is placed to the left and slightly above the dinner plate (think 10 o'clock). And the bread plate is placed to the left, above the salad plate (think 11 o'clock).

Which Glasses go with which Drink

Napkin: The napkin is placed to the left of the forks.

Forks: The fish or shrimp fork is on the outside left. Next in line is the dinner fork, and the salad fork is placed next to the plate. The dessert fork (when needed) is placed above the plate horizontally.
*Hint Put the forks in the order that they will be used, from outside in. If you are having a salad first, put that fork first.

Knives: The bread knife is placed on the bread plate. The dinner knife is to the right of the plate with the serrated edge facing in.

Spoons: The teaspoon is placed to the right of the dinner knife, and the soup spoon (if needed) is placed to the right of that. If there is a need for a dessert spoon it is placed above the plate.
*Hint If you also are using a dessert fork the spoon should be placed horizontally above the fork, facing the opposite direction.

Glasses: The water goblet is placed above the knife and spoons (1 o'clock ). To the right and slightly below that is the red wine glass and then below that is the white wine glass.

FORMAL

Lisa Hughes

Formal

Formal A formal table setting is used during a meal with at least four courses. This menu consists of an appetizer, a salad, a main course and a dessert. Sometimes the meal will include soup, fish, palate cleanser and post-dessert courses, and the settings will include a coffee cup and saucer.

CASUAL

Lisa Hughes

Casual

Casual This is the place setting you find in most restaurants, and it's what you'd typically use for a dinner with friends and family. This time you only put out the utensils you and your guests will use.

Napkin Use
The meal begins when the host unfolds his or her napkin. This is your signal to do the same. Place your napkin on your lap, completely unfolded if it is a small luncheon napkin or in half, lengthwise, if it is a large dinner napkin. Typically, you want to put your napkin on your lap soon after sitting down at the table (but follow your host's lead). The napkin remains on your lap throughout the entire meal and should be used to gently blot your mouth when needed. If you need to leave the table during the meal, place your napkin on your chair as a signal to your server that you will be returning. The host will signal the end of the meal by placing his or her napkin on the table. Once the meal is over, you too should place your napkin neatly on the table to the right of your dinner plate. (Do not refold your napkin, but don't wad it up, either.)

Ordering
If, after looking over the menu, there are items you are uncertain about, ask your server any questions you may have. Answering your questions is part of the server's job. It is better to find out before you order that a dish is prepared with something you do not like or are allergic to than to spend the entire meal picking tentatively at your food. An employer will generally suggest that your order be taken first; his or her order will be taken last. Sometimes, however, the server will decide how the ordering will proceed. Often, women's orders are taken before men's. As a guest, you should not order one of the most expensive items on the menu or more than two courses unless your host indicates that it is all right. If the host says, "I'm going to try this delicious sounding cheesecake; why don't you try dessert too," or "The prime rib is the specialty here; I think you'd enjoy it," then it is all right to order that item if you would like.

"Reading" the Table Setting Should you be attending a formal dinner or banquet with pre-set place settings, it is possible to gain clues about what may be served by "reading" the place setting. Start by drawing an imaginary line through the center of the serving plate (the plate will be placed in the center of your dining space). To the right of this imaginary line all of the following will be placed; glassware, cup and saucer, knives, and spoons, as well as a seafood fork if the meal includes seafood. It is important to place the glassware or cup back in the same position after its use in order to maintain the visual presence of the table. To the left of this imaginary line all of the following will be placed; bread and butter plate (including small butter knife placed horizontally across the top of the plate), salad plate, napkin, and forks. Remembering the rule of "liquids on your right" and "solids on your left" will help in allowing you to quickly become familiar with the place setting.

Etiquette in Indian Restaurant The basic etiquette for any restaurant is very similar such as leaving a nice tip for good service, and being courteous to your host. Many Indian restaurants are not very formal. Yes even those considered best (Indian restaurant are usually very similar). The etiquette for Indian (or any ethnic South Asian) restaurants might be little different from other restaurants. Below I have provided some basic rules.

Do Not Ask for Beef or Pork: Many Indians are either Hindus or Muslims. In Hinduism, the cow is considered a sacred animal so it cannot be eaten. Similarly, Muslims consider the pig to be a very filthy animal so it cannot be eaten. Most Indian restaurants do not serve any beef or pork products. Many restaurateurs might get offended if you ask for beef or pork, when you do not see it on the menu. If you see it on the menu, it is okay to ask. However, both of those meats are not really an Indian specialty, so the safest bet for meat is chicken meat followed by lamb meat. Please also note that some Indian restaurants are purely vegetarian and do not serve any meat. Vegetarian restaurants are usually marked vegetarian from outside. Please do not offend a vegetarian owner by asking for meat.

If it is not wet or messy, it is okay to eat with hand: Many Indian food such as naan (flat bread) can be enjoyed by eating with hand. The proper technique would be to break the bread, dip or take small piece of condiments such as chutney, or vegetable curry and eat it. So, it is perfectly fine to use your hands while eating. The basic rule of thumb is if you do not make a mess by eating something with your hands (such as liquid, grains of rice) it can be enjoyed with your hands if you wish. The philosophy behind this is that eating is a very sensual thing and one should be able to enjoy eating with as many senses as possible tasting, smelling, looking and touching.

Concept of Jutha:
Jutha means something that came in contact with your mouth, your saliva or your plate (while eating). It is basically something that directly or indirectly came in contact with your saliva. It is considered very rude and unhygienic to offer someone else your Jutha unless you are very close family, couple or close friend. So, avoid doing this if you are not sure how your other Indian diners feel about it.

Alcoholic Drinks: Many Indian restaurants would not serve alcoholic drink. Even they serve alcohol, few restaurants have any range to choose from. Indians do not have any wine and dine culture, so best would be to go dry and try something like mango lassi for a refreshing alternative.

Paying Bill For many Indians, when they invite you to a restaurant, it generally means they are the host and they are going to pay the bill. It however depends on the individual and nature of the invitation. Many Indians feel awkward asking new acquaintances or friends to ask for payment if they invited them. Even if they want to pay you, when offered money, they will say no at least once. So, please be double sure if they want to share. Similarly, when you invite your Indian friend to Indian restaurant they might think you will be paying it. If you want to go dutch, rather than inviting them, just use words as lets go Xyz or lets us both try Xyz

The Technique of Eating Gracefully With Your Fingers Use Your Thumb Food, say a small amount of rice, is collected in a small pile on your plate, blended with one or more bits of curry, and then picked up with a twist of the wrist and held on the four fingers of your hand. The thumb remains free. Keeping the food level, maneuver your fingers to your mouth until the tips of your fingers are almost, or just, touching your lower lip. Don't put your fingers into your mouth. Use your thumb to pop the food inside.

Good Manners
Conventions of good manners vary from region to region. For instance, in North India it is impolite to dirty more than the first two segments of your fingers. Since North Indians eat mostly rotis and drier curries, this isnt too difficult. In the South, where they eat lots more rice, and enjoy very wet curries, it is permitted to use your whole hand.

Use Your Right Hand It is very important to eat with your right hand only. Your left hand rests on the table or your lap while you eat. Though it is acceptable to tear off a bit of a roti in your left hand and tear off pieces with your right, it is better to only use the right hand, pinning it with your little finger and tearing with your thumb and forefinger. The question of what a left-handed person should do is a bit complicated. If it is at all possible, try and eat with your right hand. If it is too awkward, use the left, but perhaps explain to your dinner companions that you are left handed and cannot eat with your right hand.