Family Conflict Resolution

FAMILY
CONFLICT
RESOLUTION
“Peace is not the absence of
conflict, it is the ability to handle
conflict by peaceful means.”
- Ronald Reagan
LECTURE OBJECTIVES:
To help the participants to:

 gain a deeper understanding of the
causes of conflicts in the family and how
important it is to address these in order
to maintain a healthy family relationship
 identify the most effective conflict
resolution strategy to use in a given
situation
OUTLINE:
 Definition of Conflict
 Causes of Family Conflicts
 Root Causes & Perpetuating Factors
 Solving Family Conflicts
 Conflict Management Styles
ACTIVITY TIME !
1. Form six (6) to eight (8) groups.

2. Each group will be given a scenario. The task
is to portray the scenario and how the family will
resolve the conflict. (10 minutes preparation; 2
minutes presentation/group)
PROCESSING
1. How did you feel about the scenarios? Do

these apply to you in real life?
2. What did you do in order to address/solve
the conflict and why did you use that
strategy?
3. What other alternative solutions were you
able to think of and why did you not choose
to use it?
FAMILY CONFLICT
RESOLUTION
Conflict Resolution refers to the ways by
which individuals or groups deal with social
conflict (or interpersonal conflict), in this case,
among family members.
Conflict in the family exists when two or more

family members express differences in objectives
or ideas that pose problems to their relationship,
whether the incompatibility is real or imagined.
CAUSES
 Life Transitions
 Becoming new parents
 A child entering school/adjusting to a new
school
 Transition to adolescence
 Children moving out of home
 Separation of Parents and Re-marriage
CAUSES
 Financial circumstances
 Sudden changes
 Death of family member
 Loss of job of breadwinner
CAUSES
 Unmet needs/expectations
 Differing parenting styles
 Contradicting values/ Clash of
Personalities
 Sibling rivalry
 In-laws
 Sickness/Disabilities
PERPETUATING FACTORS
 Poor communication skills
 Lack of Discipline and Good Role Models
 Unrealistic expectations
 Poor parenting skills
 Overly strict / Lack of trust
 Pampering
 Neglectful
 Abusive
 Favoritism
5 CONFLICT MANAGEMENT
STYLES
1.Accommodating
2.Avoiding
3.Competing
4.Compromising
5.Collaborating
STYLES
Accommodating the other party in order
1. Accommodating to satisfy their concern while putting
aside your own interests
Pros: It can minimize conflict and both

parties can move past the argument. It is
also effective if the party who gets his/her
way has a better solution/idea.
Cons: The accommodator places his/her

concerns last which can lead to him/her
feeling resentful.
STYLES
2. Avoiding Not taking any action of resolving the

conflict i.e. avoiding communication
Pros: The person can remove
himself/ herself to the stress of
facing the other party temporarily,
hoping the conflict might just die
down. It is also effective if
engaging in the conflict would be
costly or you would not stand a
chance of winning.
Cons: The conflict will never be

resolved.
STYLES
Pushing for one’s own concerns/interests

3. Competing without regard for the other party
Pros: It can be effective during

emergencies when a quick decision
(which should be for the greater good) is
needed.
Cons: It can make the situation very

hostile. By using this style often, one may
not be able to form deep, long-term, and
healthy relationships.
5 CONFLICT MANAGEMENT STYLES
Forming a partially satisfying solution
4. Compromising by both parties when a full resolution is

not yet achievable
Pros: When there is low level of trust

between the two parties but both have
important concerns, a compromise might
be a good temporary resolution strategy
to prevent the conflict from escalating.
Cons: This may require the two parties to

be in constant watch to make sure their
agreements are maintained.
STYLES
Cooperating/working with the other

5. Collaborating party in order to achieve a mutually
satisfying resolution that best address
their concerns
Pros: Win-Win Outcome; Trust
and respect is earned; Learning
how to collaborate and being
successful at it is fulfilling
Cons: Require more effort and

might not be useful when timing
is crucial
STYLES
1. A ccommodating Determine
your current
2. A voiding conflict
resolution
3. C ompeting (CR) style
and see how
you can
4. C ompromising improve
this.
5. C ollaborating
POINTS TO PONDER:
1. How important and urgent is the

issue?
2. How important is your relationship
with the other party?
3. What power do you have relative to
the other party?
KEY POINTS:
Understanding the issue/problem, listening to
the other person, and communicating your
concerns are important elements of conflict
resolution.
 Use “I” statements.
 Ask yourself “Would I rather be happy or right?”
 Use a scenario-based approach by choosing

the best Conflict Resolution style in a given
situation.
KEY POINTS:
Our family is irreplaceable. We have to learn
how to live with them, accept them for who
they are, and help one another become
healthier and better people.
 If you think that you can no longer handle the
situation, ask the help of a mental health
professional
 Counselor, Life Coach, Psychologist,
Psychiatrist, etc.
“It is difficult to foster peace
between people when one does not
have peace within oneself.”
- Dalai Lama
Mental
Health
is
Peace
#18 East Avenue, Quezon City
of
Contact details: 921-4958 loc. 107
Email address: eis@pmha.org.ph or Mind.
oned@pmha.org.ph
Facebook: Pmha Quezoncity
REFERENCES:
 Barsky, A.E. (2017). Definition of Social Conflict. Conflict

Resolution for the Helping Professions: Negotiation, Mediation,
Advocacy, Facilitation, and Restorative Justice 3 r d Ed.
 Bisk, University of Notre Dame (2017). The Five Styles of Conflict
Resolution. Retrieved from www.notredameonline.com.
 Chancy, S. (2017). The Thomas Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument
(TKI) for addressing conflicts. Retrieved from www.ascenditur.no.
 Wright State University (n.d.) Conflict Management--Style and
Strategy. Retrieved from http://www.wright.edu.
 Graphics retrieved from:
 Pressfoto at Freepik.com
 Blog Free Clip Art at www.diysolarpanelsv.com
 Pearse Trust Blog at www.pearse-trust.ie
 Essa at www.economicstudents.com
 www.clipart-library.com
 lyndon.sipe at www. steemit.com
 www.iemoji.com
 www.ascenditur.no

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FAMILY

To help the participants to:

1. Form six (6) to eight (8) groups.

1. How did you feel about the scenarios? Do

Conflict in the family exists when two or more

Pros: It can minimize conflict and both

Cons: The accommodator places his/her

2. Avoiding Not taking any action of resolving the

Cons: The conflict will never be

Pushing for one’s own concerns/interests

Pros: It can be effective during

Cons: It can make the situation very

Forming a partially satisfying solution

4. Compromising by both parties when a full resolution is

Pros: When there is low level of trust

Cons: This may require the two parties to

Cooperating/working with the other

Cons: Require more effort and

1. How important and urgent is the

 Use a scenario-based approach by choosing

 Barsky, A.E. (2017). Definition of Social Conflict. Conflict

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