ASL?

just spent half an hour waiting for a pizza i hadn't even ordered yet. never let your enemy know your next move.

Who is the enemy in this situation? The people cooking the pizza?

im the enemy in this situation

ah to feel the pleasing weight of a Beanie Baby™ in each hand

Our local newspaper ran a story about the legendary graffiti artist who recently passed away and. Literally everything about it is fucking insane. I'm insane about it.

So this guy has been extremely active for around fifteen years, during which he spread these beautiful, high quality pieces all over the country, way over a thousand of his standard signature, and probably thousands more. He did completely batshit stuff like literally spray painting an entire train from top to bottom or leaving his signature at the top of a 600ft tall overpass and this whole time, only five people from his crew know who he really is. To everyone else it's a complete mystery.

And then he dies at the age of 35. A few weeks after his death, his crew shows up at his completely unassuming parents' doorstep, reveals who they are and asks if they can host a memorial exhibition of his art.

Turns out, this dude has been leading an insane double life. In the daytime he was a meek little office worker with a partially paralyzed arm and no social life to speak of. In the nighttime he was a fucking legend. Not only did he climb that fucking 600ft overpass, he did it WITH A PHYSICAL DISABILITY. THE MADLAD. And throughout the entire time, fifteen years, he got caught once. ONCE. HE DID ALL THAT UNNOTICED. THAT'S INSANE.

The great thing about having friends and acquaintances across a variety of professions is to really hammer home as much as possible the fact there is literally zero correlation between the amount someone actually works, the amount they contribute to society, and how much they make in a year.

We've lost some of the greatest posters of our generation to employment

and with the help of president trump's recession, we may get them back

i don't give a fuck about your portfolio get in my boiling cauldron stupid bitch

not to like out myself as having whatever problems I have but if Sam Reich gave me an extremely bizarre and detailed list of tasks and one year to not only complete it but complete it better than two other people, I feel like it would really fix my life. clarity of purpose would find me to an extent that it never has before.

oh this resonates huh

Important detail in this is that he also gives us the company credit card to accomplish the tasks

god I want the company credit to accomplish tasks

go whiteboy go!

they put tariffs on killing myself

PRACTICE URGE SURFING

I take immense schadenfreude in Elon Musk spending $25 million to try to influence an election in Wisconsin only for the candidate he was backing to lose by a larger margin than was predicted before Musk got into the race. Like how tf do you dump that much money into a state supreme court election and get not only nothing out of it but LESS than nothing. That's a truly impressive level of failure. I'm watching Elon become the most hated man in America like the Sickos yes hahaha yes comic

The latest news out of DC is that everyone in the federal government, up to and including all the MAGA ghouls cannot fucking stand Elon Musk

lol. lmao, even

When all you have is a vase, all your problems start to look like flowers

Well sometimes my problems look like two heads facing each other really close

Manager i gotta Leave i don't feel sexy and free today

This is what posting your artwork after a mutual posts a big life update feels like

[Billboard with a tiger drawing. Billboard text: Motorcycle accident? Aw, that sucks! Do you like the tiger drawing? Call and let us know! 1-800-LAW-TIGERS]

5 minutes into the fabric store: wow the world has so much to offer and so many possible wonderful things to make

10 minutes into the fabric store: everything around me will continue to pollute the earth long after humans are gone and this ring of plastic minion beads will see the new pangea

ah, I see everyone is having the same experience at the Joanne's landfillcore clearance sale