hope this explains it

it does and I hate it, thank you

important update

oh your pronouns are he/they?

well that’s mathematically incorrect becuase you can still simplify the fraction since both sides have “he”

making your pronouns technically 1/ty

>:)

What are they looking at?

Today my wife texted me this, and then immediately called me to make sure I got it because it was “an urgent message”.

it sucks that even todo lists get affected by the adhd 'absorption of stationary objects into their environment thus leading to effective invisibility' thing

yeah my to-do list is empty. what do you mean "what about those five items?" those are just part of the ui obviously

📦 Shipping update: we're not delivering your parcel because you checked the tracking page too much and we got shy about it

Im sorry but it is so funny how people outside of tumblr view us. Like why are the tiktokers treating tumblr like some professional ass website you need to do extensive prep before you begin posting on. And the follower farming advice is so fucking funny to me when this is the website where people actively hate getting new followers

Tumblr is the website where you ramble to yourself like a madman until someone decides they like you and put you into their pocket like a shiny rock. That's how you get followers

@lgbtqcreators creator challenge — colour x layout

One of those tropes that never fail to be funny: when the protagonist is literally telling the truth, and nobody believes them, but everyone is perfectly chill with what they assume was what actually happened, so the protagonist is trying to defend themselves for no reason.

Imagine being like "no but for real, I didn't push him. He literally just slipped and fell on his own", and everyone who hated that guy is like "oh yes, of course darling, of course nobody here would accuse you of having done the unthinkable. We all know that with the way that he was, it was only a matter of time until he would someday just slip on his own, with only one person there to witness the accident. I just wish it could have been me."

I'd just like to clarify some things about Senator Cory Booker's marathon Senate speech in protest of the present administration and everything they are doing to the American people.

Senator Booker was NOT allowed to sit down, eat, or use the bathroom during his speech. Sitting or leaving the room to use the bathroom would be considered yielding the floor. Eating would have interfered with his speaking and the person who has the senate floor must continue to speak, except when listening to questions that they will then answer.

He only took occasional sips of water.

The person who previously held the record for longest speech on the Senate floor did have bathroom breaks and also did things like read from the encyclopedia.

Senator Booker did not do that. His speech was to point out the damage that this administration is doing and he stayed on that subject.

Senator Booker's speech did reach many people. It wasn't a silly stunt that was done so that he could take the record for longest speech. He wanted to show the country that democrats will do something to bring attention to the problems we are facing. That democrats are listening to them.

Senator Cory Booker spoke for 25 hours and 4 minutes to "make good trouble."

also like, a Black man breaking Strom Thurmond's record is absolutely *chef's kiss*

for those who are too young to know about Strom, he was literally a white supremacist

Not just ‘a’ white supremacist. He was *THE* white supremacist. INCREDIBLY IMPORTANT CONTEXT HERE is that Storm Thurmond’s speech that he broke the record of? It was 24 hours and 18 minutes opposing *the Civil Rights Act of 1957*. He voted against the Civil Rights Act of 1964 and the Voting Rights Act of 1965. He was a segregationist POS who was the blueprint for the Southern Strategy which was designed by Lee Atwater, a former Thurmond aide. Having his record broken by Booker is astounding and I’m so happy.

If hell exists, Strom Thurmond is being flambéed and I’m happy for it.

May 2014: Senator Bill Heffernan complains about the lack of metal detectors in parliament, tabling a pipe bomb he's brought with him as evidence

someone questioned the quality of the image and thought it might be AI and I'm here to confirm this is real

listen this isn’t rat related but I’m going off the walls right now this is literally so fucking funny

orange bear puppet: i think tutter’s looking a little tired, don’t you?

tutter (mouse puppet): [panting and screaming]

THEY’RE ING THE CAT!!!!!