🫒You Can Sit on It and Spin.🫒
It’s not misogyny if it’s anthropology. It’s not hate if it’s facts. And it’s not a friendship if he’s picturing you naked every time you speak.
📢 Here’s Some Game. Take It or Cry Into Your “Bestie’s” Chest About It.
Alright, sugar snap. You ready? Because this ain’t a hug, a pep talk, or a wine-fueled empowerment sesh. This is unfiltered, certified, big-brained male reality — dipped in blunt-force truth and wrapped in the sarcasm of every man who’s tolerated your delusions out of primal hope.
Here’s the game: Your “platonic male friend”? He doesn’t actually like you. He doesn’t respect you as an intellectual equal. And if he’s masculine at all, you talking is just background noise between two biological urges: food and sex.
And you’re not the food.
📉 Feminine Friendship Value = Brutally Overrated
You walk around acting like your company is the gift that keeps on giving. Like your conversation skills and vibe energy are so spiritually nourishing that Chad should thank you for letting him hear your lukewarm takes on astrology and why you “felt a weird energy shift last Tuesday.”
Reality? He’s not there for your energy. He’s there for the 0.03% chance that someday you’ll stop pretending to be emotionally unavailable and let him see one boob.
You’re not a cherished soul twin. You’re a maybe. A buffer zone between his current dry spell and the next woman with functioning hormones and lower standards.
And the more introspective you think you are? The more mentally excruciating you are to him. He doesn’t want to “get deep.” He wants to get in — and your mouth running is in the way.
📚 Science-Backed Slap: He’s Lying, You’re Deluded
Let’s get nerdy for a sec.
👨🔬 University of Wisconsin Study (Bleske-Rechek, 2012):
Men are chronically incapable of being “just friends” with women they find even remotely attractive. Women, meanwhile, have no idea.
Translation: He’s playing the long con. And you’re out here bragging about your “male bestie” like you’re some kind of emotional chess grandmaster. No, babe. You’re the pawn. And he’s been waiting five years for a weak moment, a sad Spotify playlist, and one cheap bottle of red wine.
🤡 Feminist Flex = Masculine Recoil
You think men like your confidence? Your sass? Your political takes? Your girlboss energy?
They hate it. They tolerate it with Olympic-level discipline because they know one wrong word = canceled, unf*cked, and ghosted.
Your opinions don’t “intimidate” men. They repulse them. Every time you say something smug about “patriarchy” or your “truth,” a masculine man adds one more reason to never call you again.
🧠 The Ancient Male Brain is Subconsciously OFFENDED That You’re Even Speaking to Him
Let me explain something no man will ever admit publicly:
When a man hears a woman talking like she’s on his level, something ancient and violent in him twitches.
That’s not sexism. That’s tribal programming. He’s carrying generations of men who bled, built, warred, farmed, bled again — and you’re out here interrupting his sentence to “circle back” to something you saw on TikTok?
That noise you hear isn’t agreement. It’s every male ancestor he’s ever had collectively rolling their eyes in unison.
💄 The Kamala Factor: Feminism’s Final Boss of Male Disinterest
No masculine man liked Kamala Harris. They pretended to — for the same reason they pretend to care about your brunch drama: Access preservation.
Kamala spent an entire campaign cackling through hard questions and ducking any masculine challenge — especially The Rogan Gauntlet™️. Why?
Because deep down, she knew one conversation with a dominant man would peel the “empowerment” off her like wet acrylics in a thunderstorm.
If you think men were inspired by her, you’re clinically divorced from testosterone.
🔍 Feminist Self-Destruction Checklist™️
Let’s make it real uncomfortable. Tally your L’s:
🔲 I think my friendship is a gift to men. 🔲 I brag about having male best friends who “respect” me. 🔲 I believe Kamala is empowering. 🔲 I’ve used the phrase “toxic masculinity” unironically. 🔲 I’ve rejected a man and still expected him to be emotionally available to me. 🔲 I talk more than I listen — especially to men. 🔲 I think disagreeing with me is “violence.” 🔲 I think this blog is “misogynistic” but I still read all 2,500 words.
Score Breakdown:
- 1-3: ✨ Garden-Variety Delusion
- 4-6: 🧠 Full-Blown Ego Schizophrenia
- 7-8: 💀 You are the reason male podcasts exist
🥩 Final Truth Steak: You Are Not the Prize
Your “friendship” is not a blessing. Your opinions are not a service. Your emotional needs are not currency. And your proximity to men doesn’t equal respect — it equals strategic patience until you let your guard down, your looks fade, or your last coping mechanism fails.
You think you’re the selector? Nah, you’re the fallback.
He’s not honoring you. He’s waiting for you to slip.
🧠 TL;DR:
- He doesn’t want to talk. He wants to conquer.
- You’re not respected — you’re silently tolerated.
- Kamala is a walking 🚩 for men with working frontal lobes.
- The masculine mind actively recoils at your “strong woman” act.
- Your friendship is worthless unless it converts.
- This isn’t misogyny. This is species maintenance.
⚖️⚖️⚖️ LEGAL DISCLAIMER: This truth-punch was brought to you by evolution, free speech, and the masculine burden of restraint. If you feel triggered, please consult your nearest hormone or coping mechanism. We do not offer refunds for emotional fragility. Block, cry, or change. Those are your options.
⚖️⚖️⚖️
📢 Send this to a woman who thinks being “one of the boys” is her love language. 💬 Comment if your male best friend stopped replying after you started dating Chad. 📩 DM this to a dude who's trapped in the emotional hostage zone. 🎯 Reblog if you've ever faked interest just to keep the option alive.
I'd like to remind everyone who sees my posts that this is misogynist bullshit. like seriously fucking kill yourself if you believe any of this is true.
Ok, this makes me sick, lol and I know it is wrong, because somehow he gets to speak for all men, it is full of a very narrow, authoritative sounding and bio-essentialist view of humans. You don't see women as equal human beings, your problem dude what I am gonna say?
