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the weight of the world makes me feel like the future is dumb

@birdship / birdship.tumblr.com

lumi | thirtysomething | they/them this blog is only sometimes nsfw but please don't follow me if you're a minor.
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taxidermychrist-deactivated2025

do it for the faggots who never got to btw

it is absolutely essential to have friends you can have extremely insane pervert conversations with. this is kind of what makes life worth living

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Reblogged meowgon

My new mission in life is to impart this wisdom to as many people as possible

IT'S ALSO USEFUL IF YOU HAVE TMJ DISORDER

in both cases: always start on the lowest setting and wrapped in something soft!! if it hurts, stop!!

But, re: sinuses: look up a diagram of where they are, and when a spot feels particularly good or is particularly congested, hold it there longer. Definitely keep tissues handy for when it drains. Also it can help if your sinuses hurt like fuck but aren't actually congested (which happened when I had covid), but the effect doesn't last long.

Re: TMJ disorder: You can just push it against the joint, obviously; if your vibe has a small contact point you can REALLY dig in there (but again: stop if it hurts). But don't forget the whole area around the joint, around your ears, and up your scalp. There's a lot of muscles that tighten when your jaw is tight/stiff/in pain. Be especially careful when on a spot that's just skin over a bone without a lot of padding.

vibrators can also help if you have restless legs syndrome! Especially ones with fancy pulse patterns. When my RLS is severe I tuck them behind my knees or wherever & can finally lie still & sleep. You might need to wrap them in fabric to avoid skin irritation ymmv. There was even a paper published somewhere called "counter stimulatory devices for RLS" that was hilariously vague about saying the word "vibrator"

Once again adding also useful if you have dystonia or any kind of muscle spasticity. I have cervical dystonia (neck spasms) and dystonia in my left leg that's essentially like persistent Charley horse cramps from my neuromuscular issues and bought a Hitachi expressly for this purpose lol

A vibrator has been recommended to me to unblock clogged milk ducts for anyone that may apply to

I learned about the sinus thing and immediately bought a vibrator for that purpose. And yes, it DOES help with sinus headaches. 

I use mine to cum as well

Fandom terms have to sound silly, like blorbo or squick, because fandom needs humbling. Not a lot. But just every so often you need a good grounding reminder that all of this is literally made up nonsense for fun.

If you take a fictional thing so seriously that silly words genuinely annoy you, you've gone too far and you need to dial it back.

i attracted a deathclaw to my settlement and all it ever does is queue for beverages

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an-gremlin

Big Thirsty

[muttering to myself as I rifle through ancient tomes and scrolls] girl on girl... girl on girl... [getting increasingly agitated] where is it. WHERE IS IT!!! DAMN AND BLAST!!! [throws a dagger across the room, slitting my lackey's throat and embedding in the center of a mural of a lily flower. the flower depresses into the wall, and an unseen mechanism begins to click. the wall opens up, revealing rows of shelves stacked high with dusty old tomes.] [I walk into the room, kicking my lackey's corpse out of the way] [I pick up a book and leaf through it] [it's yaoi]

can anyone link me to that one repost of an instagram (i think?) post where this woman is bragging about stuff like cheating on her dying boyfriend, but in a really funny way that is extremely over the top and obviously not true, but she gets a bunch of comments taking her seriously and telling her what a bad person she is

does anyone even know what i'm referring to......... i'm having such a hard time finding it

hi, a lot of you need a perspective reset

  • the average human lifespan globally is 70+ years
  • taking the threshold of adulthood as 18, you are likely to spend at least 52 years as a fully grown adult
  • at the age of 30 you have lived less than one quarter of your adult life (12/52 years)
  • 'middle age' is typically considered to be between 45-65
  • it is extremely common to switch careers, start new relationships, emigrate, go to college for the first or second time, or make other life-changing decisions in middle age
  • it's wild that I even have to spell it out, but older adults (60+) still have social lives and hobbies and interests.
  • you can still date when you get old. you can still fuck. you can still learn new skills, fashionable, be competitive. you can still gossip, you can still travel, you can still read. you can still transition. you can still come out.
  • young doesn't mean peaked. you're inexperienced in your 20s! you're still learning and practicing! you're developing social skills and muscle memory that will last decades!
  • there are a million things to do in the world, and they don't vanish overnight because an imaginary number gets too big
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