Sonic's burger store has recognized the strategic importance of America's drink infrastructure and implemented tamper seals to prevent your large Diet Dr. Pepper being poisoned by ISIS lone wolfs or seditious court advisors

I'm glad there's another sheep dog out there who understands the inherent danger you place yourself in when you pay a poor person to deliver your invaluable drinks from the burger store. Very few are willing to admit that they hate us and resent our ability to buy large drinks. We are in all out Marxist warfare and they will stop at nothing to get you because they are just jealous and hate you for having a real job.

this logic is a cousin to the SMBC comic

"sonic uses publicly available tamper seals for your drink when it's getting delivered so you can know if your driver drank your fucking doctor pepper and got his or her germs all over it. but if I claim that the reason this exists is that people think ISIS is poisoning their drinks instead of because doordash and uber eats drivers constantly snack on people's deliveries, I can express some sweet delicious contempt."

come on man, people can tell when their drink has been drunk, drinking and tampering are very different things. steelmanning I can see it being a *deterrent* for drinking someone’s drink but it still seems kind of over the top and insulting to drivers (edit: damn it is more common than I thought though)

oh it is super, super common. it's also why many places put seals or stickers on take-out bags even though the Pestilence has passed.

I spent like 20 minutes looking for the Super Best Friend Cast clip where Pat talks about the Herculean task of trying to get his food delivered without having someone eat it, but couldn't

yeah it does seem crazy common. I don't have a lot of sympathy for non-tippers having this done to them, but otherwise it is looking a little more logical to have a seal on both food and drink. It's the "tampering" part that sounds crazy, as if the order is going to be poisoned rather than consumed

yeah but the sticker store doesn't sell "anti snacking but not anti tampering, not to say tampering is okay but it's not super relevant to what we're doing here" seals, they're gonna have it say the best interpretation of what it does. plus it would be more insulting to everyone involved if the sticker was like "hey delivery driver, don't snack on this you dickhead"

Thing is, I'm pretty sure I've seen prudencepaccard believe things that are just as silly as the idea of Marxist drink tampering.

There are loads of security videos of delivery people putting down a package, taking a picture to confirm delivery, and then immediately stealing it.

"A delivery person messing with your food order somehow" is not exactly beyond the realms of possibility.

>come on man, people can tell when their drink has been drunk,

No? I sure couldn't ever tell if someone took a sip, unless they left lipstick on the edge and I happened to check. Which few people regularly do.

You assert this as truth, but provide no actual evidence.

>drinking and tampering are very different things.

Drinking someone's food is literally tampering, for all casual purposes.

>but it still seems kind of over the top and insulting to drivers

You say this after you backed up and co-signed a post specifically about mocking the idea of any kind of food tampering or pilfering whatsoever. Someone who made up a strawman about Marxists from thin air just for smugging purposes.

You posted the comic, but you have no actual evidence the concern is false. You and OP were doing the exact opposite. You dismissed a concern out of hand because of personal incredulity.

Which makes you more like the guy being mocked in the comic.

I love funky wildlife services. I aspire to be as funky and know as much about wildlife

Image description: a tweet by divinelydaria.

saw an inspiring video that said you need to have 4 hobbies.

create, consume, cavort, commune

create: bring something to life consume: appreciate the art of another cavort: move your body daily commune: have a community to socialize with

end image description.

I think you need hobbies that do all four things but the number of hobbies needed to cover all these needs may vary. Some hobbies pull double/triple duty. Some hobbies can cause repetitive stress injuries so it's good to have a few different ones that fulfill the same need so you can rotate to get the fulfillment without the carpal tunnel.

Tumblr really is aging.

This is true tho.

Misread this as 'you need to have 4 hobbits'

also true! there’s a really famous three-volume self-help guide about that!

unless all you’re doing is liberating a single mountain from a dragon, in which case you can probably get by with just one, so long as you also have a lot of dwarves.

wow…ahead of its time (and ahead of its host)

Kermit knew you could pick your own gender, and is now finding out that there are more options in that category than previously suspected

nice

here i assumed it was gonzo. . .

The oligarchy lost tonight. Congrats to @crawfordforwi and the entire state of Wisconsin!

We Do Not Like The Concrete Tomb.

This is our most popular post and we've seen more than one person tag it as "unreality." We understand why one might think that but we assure you: it was not.

These facilities chew you up. They suck the life from you and grind your body to dust to extract every ounce of profit they can.

These places destroy the body, the mind, and the soul.

Have you ever looked closely at a car windshield?

The edge of the glass is painted where it is glued to the car but it has these small dots between the clear and painted glass.

These are there for a reason. When the sun hits the glass the painted areas and the clear areas will absorb heat at different rates. This causes the glass to expand and contract differently putting stress on the glass.

These dots help the glass to warm up more evenly over a larger area so the glass does not suffer stress that could cause it to spontaneously explode.

Fun fact: the Tesla cybertruck doesn’t have these.

Yes, the glass will spontaneously crack or explode in the sun.

I feel like people are missing the Very Important reference picture and that's just criminal. Clearly if you look at the dog that inspired the piece, you would understand the inherent validity of the voters' choice.

I submitted this photo for an art project where we had to pick a piece that we loved but wouldn't traditionally be considered good art and my instructor was so in love with this drawing that its not the header for our class and is the literal cover art for any assignment we do

This machine kills AI

This is the most satisfying story I've read in a long time

I know I absolutely promised no April Fools stuff, but the Library and Archives of Canada announced their major acquisition of the declassified journals and military records of Canadian supersoldier James “Logan” Howlett and I think it’s the best thing I’ve seen all week.

April 1, 2016 – Gatineau, Quebec – Library and Archives Canada (LAC)

Library and Archives Canada (LAC) acquires the declassified journals and military records of Canadian supersoldier James “Logan” Howlett.

Logan was born in 1882 in Cold Lake, Alberta, Canada, to wealthy landowner Elizabeth Howlett and her grounds-keeper Thomas Logan.

Logan’s journals provide valuable insight into his early life in Canada, including work as a miner in a British Columbia stone quarry, a fur trader for the Hudson’s Bay Company, and a homesteader in the Canadian Rockies. His military career spanned multiple conflicts, making his personnel records an unprecedented study in Canadian military history. Logan was gravely wounded in action many times, and gained a reputation as a gritty survivor.

Quick Facts

Facebook. Website.

Man, I almost drank myself to death yesterday, I can't even remember my name, if only there was someone that could help me.

The the trustworthy and saint-like lieutenant:

sunrise, parabellum

Sorry but I can't allow this to remain just in the tags

Well okay