Birdbrain

Going to a seder at a family friend's place tonight and I have been informed multiple times that someone there has changed her name to Stephanie, but because it seems nobody wants to deadname her, nobody has specified who Stephanie is. So I guess I'm just going to get a surprise Stephanie when I arrive.

I am among the first people to arrive which means I get to play a fun process of elimination game. It is not the family's youngest child so I think that leaves two more. Unless Stephanie is an aunt or a niece or something.

Have learned that Stephanie is the eldest child. Which is very convenient for me because she is the one family member whose name I could not remember anyway.

OMG, @hannanodaa made the most precious art of my beloved~ Sweetest baby boy doing what he loves best, petting kitties! And peep Leo behind him reading a book 📖 🥺💙

big fan of urban fantasy and similar genres because theres nothing funnier to me than a setting where youve got people fighting with enchanted blades and bows and hopping around doing magic tricks but you can also just hit a demon with your car if you feel like it

There's this very specific urban fantasy trope which is "processing the newfound horrors and wonders of the universe in a 24/7 diner" that gets me every time

chibis

Haymitch and his ducklings

comm! for @sinfulsansa

close up

This is cinema actually

THE ALI FORESHADOWING LIKE SHE’S A WIZARD THEY’RE PREPARING TO FACE AND THEYRE WARNING US ABOUT HER LIKE BARDS.

ALI IMMEDIATELY LIVING UP TO THE BALLDS SUNG ABOUT HER.

THE FACT THAT ALL OF THEIR MAGIC COMBINED DIDN’T COUNTER HER SPELL

Are you americans okay???

Everclear is what we have instead of universal healthcare.

Wound cleaner, anaesthetic, surgical instrument sterilizer, and post-surgical cleanup, all in one convenient bottle

For the last time dude, my leitmotif sounds exactly like it always has. There is no symbolism for creeping corruption in there

Care for a drink?

Me: I’m going to start only eating when I’m hungry. That way I won’t snack all day long and I can enjoy proper meals when I actually need them instead :)

Me 22hrs after my last solid food: wait fuck I forgot about the ADHD

My ADHD when I leave snacks out in the open: oh look a snack. oh, look, a snack. oh a snack. oh look

My ADHD when I put all the snacks away in the cupboard: I’ve never heard of food in my entire life.

executive dysfunction is literally like. ive had a random dollar on my floor for two weeks and i dont know when ill fit it in my schedule to pick it up. people dont realize this

picked up the doler👍

Inspirational

For the last like 2000 years you could get pussy just by being a guy. Now with divorce and the pill and women having jobs and bank accounts and shit, things have changed. If youre a dude and you want pussy you actually have to ask nicely. This will lead to the collapse of several nation states.

Jfc that kitty parade music justmakes it hilarious

I can’t believe this is an actual event that has taken place.

with the music that might actually be the most surreal thing i’ve ever watched

he blue and he exorcising

You should be able to rot in bed for 2, maybe 3 hours after waking up before it starts affecting what time it is. If I wake up at 8:30 and lie in bed for 2hr it should still be 8:30 when I get up