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god damn it, you've got to be kind

@cuips-not-cute / cuips-not-cute.tumblr.com

cuips (rhymes with loops) | he/they | been known to write occasionally | cuips_not_cute on ao3 and twitter | steddie mostly | often nsfw
🤎

Eddie's a good kisser. Steve'd almost forgotten.

His mouth is so open. So wet. His tongue swipes over Steve's molars and his lips slide sideways, head tilting so he can lick even deeper.

"Yeah," Steve murmurs. His voice is muffled by the tongue in his mouth, by his tongue in Eddie's. "Yeah, like that."

Eddie smiles. Steve can taste his teeth.

He hugs Eddie tighter to him. Gets a fist in his soft curls. Eddie whines when he tugs them. Breathes hot and heavy right into Steve's mouth. Steve sucks his puffy lower lip, pulls so the skin stretches and clicks wetly back into place. He licks up the spit running down Eddie's chin, runs his tongue along the seam of his lips and grins when they part for him.

There's a pool of liquid collecting behind Eddie's bottom teeth. Steve luxuriates in it. Drinks when it all starts to drip down into his own mouth.

He's been so fucking thirsty.

"You ready?" Eddie asks. Their lips aren't the only wet thing between them.

Steve reaches down, pulls the meat of his ass to one side. He makes room. His hole leaks lube when Eddie takes his fingers out.

"I'm ready."

Eddie's breath is shaky between them. He's never fucked something before. Steve gets to have that from him, too.

"Oh my god," Eddie says. "You're so—"

He's got the tip of Eddie's cock inside him. He, Steve Harrington, is taking cock.

"—lovely," Eddie finishes.

from ch12 of my fic, blinking red light❤️

When I'm out in the garage working, Vice gets to tag along and hunt dust bunnies in the garage attic. I pause every so often to call him down, just to make sure he hasn't gotten into trouble.

He always has a Lot to report.

some of you guys do not thump the baby to get the demons out, which is fine because sometimes cats don't have demons in em. but you have to understand that Vice is full of demons (Anxiety, Phobia of Furnace Repairmen, Fear of Babies, Hairball) and needs to be sqashed. He does not want light gentle touches. that is bad stimulation. He wants to be pulverized.

To be clear for those of you who haven't been here the whole time, Vice isn't a barn cat. Vice is an extremely anxious housecat that gets gently carried out to the garage so he can cosplay having a real job. He caught a mouse once and went into a panic about it.

eddie and steve being equally all in is so important to me. like there is no “who fell first/who fell harder” bc they both did swan dives off the cliff at the same time. like them meeting each other exactly where they’re at and it being the first time anyones ever done that, it’s the first time they don’t have to feel bad for falling in love bc the other is right there with them equally head over heels. it’s literally everything to me. that’s like a core component to them.

Anonymous asked:

How would you die in Willy Wonka’s chocolate factory?

this is a great question because it narrowed my soul! i would choke on regular chewing gum on the steps outside before even entering the factory. willy would make no attempt to perform the heimlich maneuver and would leave my corpse on the concrete

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kramergate

this ask tapped into an extremely primal part of everyone’s body soul & mind

To make a few bucks, the Corroded Coffin boys pin up a flier on the bulletin board that they’ll preform a sing-a-gram for your crush the week leading up to Valentine’s Day. $5 per song. $3 if it’s metal.

A lot of people actually take them up on this so the guys are touting around their instruments, playing acoustic covers of songs they don’t like to a bunch of cheerleaders and jocks, and Steve Harrington. A lot to Steve Harrington, actually.

Steve gets a kick out of it every time, even though he never knows the names of the songs they sing to him. He gets red faced and bright eyed with a smile ten miles wide.

Every time he asks, “Who sent you?”

And every time they shrug, “Secret admirer.”

“Oh,” Steve deflates a little and asks pretty damn sincere, “if she does another one, can you tell her that I’d love to be her valentine if I knew who she was.”

“Sure, Harrington,” Eddie snarks, nearly hitting the jock with his guitar as he stomped down the hall to find Molly Patterson. “I’ll let her know.”

“Thanks, man,” Steve calls after him, oblivious or just ignoring Eddie’s pissy attitude. He stops Jeff when they start to follow Eddie, “Oh, George. Wait.”

Steve fished a five out of his pocket, “Can you… can you play, uh. Waiting For A Girl Like You? To her.”

“Umm…we don’t actually know who is sending the requests. They give them to Eddie.”

Steve deflates more and looks like such a kicked puppy that Jeff takes the five and says, “We can try to-“

“Thanks, man! Gotta run.”

“But no promises!” Jeff calls after him, and turns to his friends. “…let’s go find a girl?”

“Yeah,” Gareth says. “One that loves all of Eddie’s favorite songs.”

We ask your questions anonymously so you don’t have to! Submissions are open on the 1st and 15th of the month.

Grocery store eggs, yes. Eggs from the people who snagged ‘em out of the nest that morning and didn’t scrub the bloom off, no.

They stay fresh about the same length of time, and it’s fairly easy to wash before you crack ‘em.

Telepathic aliens enjoy that humans will "play music" for hours at a time. When it's too mentally quiet on deck, they just announce the catchiest song titles they know and the humans will start thinking about it automatically.

The humans hate this so, so much.

Zorf: Human Steve, can you please play that song I like, the one with all the females

Steve: what

Zorf: A little bit of Monica in my life

Steve:

Steve: mother fu--

I feel like this would get Space HR involved eventually

Or...

Zorf: Why will you only play 10 seconds of the chorus of a song?? And why is THAT line on repeat?? Please play the whole song!

Adhd Human: Sorry, I can't!

I LOVE COMPLEX DATED ADVERBS. Wherein. Heretofore. Thereon. Hereunto. Whereof. Hitherward. Hereinafter. How can you look at these words and not lose your mind. They're insane. I think I'm in love.

The defeated and bloodied king was chained to kneel in front of his enemy and he says weakly: "Is my wife still alive?" His enemy nodded. "You fools," he said smirking, and the king starts laughing as the sounds of explosions getting closer shake the room.

HOLY SHIT

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