This Barbie is a D-1 Hater

Have you ever looked closely at a car windshield?

The edge of the glass is painted where it is glued to the car but it has these small dots between the clear and painted glass.

These are there for a reason. When the sun hits the glass the painted areas and the clear areas will absorb heat at different rates. This causes the glass to expand and contract differently putting stress on the glass.

These dots help the glass to warm up more evenly over a larger area so the glass does not suffer stress that could cause it to spontaneously explode.

Fun fact: the Tesla cybertruck doesn’t have these.

Yes, the glass will spontaneously crack or explode in the sun.

see the THING IS I don't feel like I ever worked hard enough to have "earned" the burnout, which is. probably how we got here.

Im sorry but it is so funny how people outside of tumblr view us. Like why are the tiktokers treating tumblr like some professional ass website you need to do extensive prep before you begin posting on. And the follower farming advice is so fucking funny to me when this is the website where people actively hate getting new followers

I don’t like being referred to as a boy

Woah mama I'll give anyone who misgenders you the Elvis Special (a bullet)

This account likely makes the list of “the last accounts I’d ever expect to be anywhere near my blog” but I appreciate it

Woah mama I'm one of your mutuals

WHAT

( <= green bean

( <= chili pepper

. <= blueberry

=3 <= broccoli

● <= orange

. <= pea

• <= plum

<3< <= strawberry

<==}< <= carrot

~<O{ <= beetroot

°o8~ <= grapes

Ó <= apple

88- <= raspberry

c'ɔ <= bell pepper

cc’ɔɔ <= pumpkin

-8 <= cherries

☆{ } <= pineapple

¶\__________ <= garden hose (to water all the plants)

alright everyone good work gardening today. Let's all head inside and get some lemonade now

*Scrolls past*

*reluctant sigh*

*scrolls back up*

*rebogs*

If a girl feels uncomfortable hanging out with you alone, and you get so offended by that, it makes you angry, she probably made the right choice.

I know I’ve reblogged this recently but still so spot the fuck on.

In general if a dude gets angry by you declining an invitation you made the right choice to say no

If they get angry when you say “no” to hanging out with them, what else are they going to get angry about you saying “no” to?

^^ Slight side note: When I was online dating I used to do what so many of us do; set up a safety check with a friend. I used to be really slick about it; take a restroom break or quietly/subtle check and answer a text. Then I realized what a good marker it was to check if I wanted to actually be on this date at all. So at whatever time check in was supposed to be, I would pull out my phone and say “sorry, I just have to let my friend know I’m good”. If someone was vaguely offended, I might stay depending on the convo we had after. If someone was SUPER offended, I said “this is exactly why. Thanks for meeting me, I’ve got to go.”  This happened three times I can remember and the first time my voice was shaking so bad as I said it because, you know. You never know what their response is going to be and he was so aggressively angry I was ending the date “over that”. 

The person I ended up with? “Ah, yay-I’m-not-murdered check. Good plan.” Then when my phone was buzzing later (because we ended up on a five hour date on a Monday night) he goes “you should probably let them know you’re still alive. Do you have to go?” 

 *No woman I was ever on a date with was mad about this. Not one. 

This is just like testing the breaks before driving an unfamiliar car guys, and you do NOT drive a car with no breaks. If they can’t handle “no,” it’s not safe for you to say, “yes,” and you need to gtfo of there so you don’t get run over.

Also, OP I love your url, it is perfect for this post.

giving birth sucks tbh. not only do you and the baby you’re birthing almost die, usually you shit yourself and often you tear your taint. then you have to push an organ out of your body (placenta) and if even a little of that remains in your body, you can hemorrhage to death or develop an infection that essentially rots your body from the inside out. even if you had a relatively “easy birth”, you bleed for weeks on end. even after that stops, your body and brain is changed for the rest of your life, the pregnancy leeched minerals from your bones, that can cause osteoporosis later. minor urinary incontinence is not uncommon, brain scans of people who gave birth show permanent changes in their brain, you’re never quite the same.

I say all of this not to say giving birth is disgusting but it is a harrowing and visceral experience. society downplays how fucking awful it is and makes it out to be a ~magical~ experience but it isn’t a magical transformative experience for everyone. it can be an extremely traumatic experience for someone who wanted to carry a pregnancy to term, much more so for someone who did not want to be pregnant in the first place or someone who knows their baby won’t survive the birth. anyway, abortion is a right. pregnancy and birth aren’t just inconvenient, it’s fucking awful.

How is it that in this entire post you didn’t say the word “woman” once? Only one sex gives birth. Only women have these experiences, only women are at risk for everything mentioned here, women are the only people this applies to. Erasing the word enables the problem.

I’m an evil trans man with a big fat pussy and it’s my life’s purpose to erase women by using inclusive language. Everyone I make a post a random woman disappears off the planet. Clean vanishes. They’re renaming all maternity wards labor & delivery wards because of me. The word breastfeeding no longer exists in the dictionary. It’s all chestfeeding now. Many world powers are trying to stop me. They can’t. They’re too slow. I’m always two steps ahead.

Virgin shaming and slut shaming piss me off in equal amounts. There’s nothing magical or special about being a virgin, and same goes with having sex. You know what’s magical? Shutting the fuck up about people’s personal choices. 

i love london

hey sexy what time do you plan on being done grieving

the suitors @ Penelope

i am so happy for you and your ugly fucking boyfriend im serious

fucking love when I'm on a call with someone and they start to do a little errand or go somewhere else and they say "and you're coming with me" like. absolutely I am let's go on an adventure I've been spirited away

ooh ooh or when they accidentally drop the phone or something and go “i dropped you! :(“ like. that little glowing box you’re waving around does indeed house my soul!! it’s me!! you’re holding me!!!! and we’re going on a little trip together!!! delightful!!!!!!!!

i love the suggestion that the device they are holding is my corporeal form. very silly and whimsical

idgaf if my parents are disappointed in me I'm not impressed by them either

I wish age gap discourse hadn't spiraled the way it has because I want there to be a safe space to say "Men in their 40s who date 25 year olds aren't predators, they're just fucking losers"

... honey you just described a predator LOL

No, I said what I said. But thank you for providing an example of how this topic has become insufferable on the internet.

i am honestly burningly curious about how a 40 year old man who fucks around with college grads is not a predator

"College grad" is not a developmental stage, nor is it what I would describe a 25 year old as. I was 4 years out of college at 25. My mother had two children at 25. You can be a fucking congressman at 25.

There's a difference between a man who is immature and buys into misogynistic views of beauty and aging and one who is a predator. Also, many actual predators? Not losers and able to move through society pretty freely being seen as cool and the ideal, so conflating the two isn't helpful.

This is going to be my final response to any attempt at discourse. You're welcome to continue amongst yourselves.

also sometimes a 40 year old and a 25 year old just weirdly find each and it's a perfectly normal relationship - like all human relationships are complex and situational, it's so rarely an either/or thing let alone just one thing only

if a 40 year old dude only dates 25 year olds, DiCaprio style or something adjacent to it, then yeah he's a loser

if a 40 year old dude meets a 25 year old through social event or friends or whatever and they happen to hit it off and make a go of it, and this isn't some sort of reoccurring pattern for the guy, that's just a relationship with an age difference

being predatory means something specific, and man I agree w/ OP and really wish people just stopped ascribing it to any and all relationship dynamics they personally might not like

predator and groomer - two words that need to go up on the "can't use till you learn their meaning" shelf

Istg I understand this so fucking hard.

My parents met on a blind date set up by a mutual coworker.

My dad was 34 and my mom was 23, the coworker didn’t even know how old my mom was.

And yet every fucking time I talk about my parents meeting and mention their ages, someone always calls my dad a pedophile. It actually makes me want to scream, it’s not that hard to grasp that people who are actually fully functioning people can consent to a dynamic maybe you wouldn’t have.

My mom wasn’t some naive teenager that got groomed, she was an adult that consented to a relationship. They have been married for over 20 years.

My mom was a fully mature adult and so was my dad. I also have an ex-friend that liked to compare their ages from when they would have been in high school, but THEY DID NOT MEET IN HIGH SCHOOL.

Please for the love of god if you do not understand the meaning of the word predator, kindly fuck off and don’t use it. Especially not about my father.

They should invent a not being exhausted