i go to the shop and I ask if they have any raspberries. they say no, they used to sell raspberries, but they haven't had any in stock in the last 15 years. I ask if there's somewhere else I can go to buy raspberries. They say no, with confidence and pride, they're the only shop around who has ever sold or will ever sell raspberries. Other shops might sell other fruit, sure, but they have a monopoly on all raspberries forever. I ask if they're possibly planning on them selling them again in future? they say they can't tell me that.

on the way home, I encounter someone eating raspberries. I ask and they tell me that they grow their own, they got some seeds from the shop back in The Raspberry Days and kept them. They take me to a field of many beautiful raspberry plants and invite me to pick my own, they're free for all the town to pick whenever they'd like.

someone comes up behind us. It's the shop manager, President of Nintendo Shuntaro Furukawa. he hatefully throws a bob-omb that blows up and kills both of us instantly for stealing 200 trillion dollars worth of potential Raspberry Shop That Doesn't Do Raspberries Anymore profits that they weren't making and then he turns around to the camera with a big thumbs up and says don't do piracy or something ok please

every time I see an old trans personal I am filled with this incredible warmth and I hope that they got everything they wanted

[footage of Victor Frankenstein sewing together female body parts to make a mate for the Creature while Lou Bega’s Mambo no.5 plays]

@pkmndaisuki how could you leave this in the tags???

Okay okay okay so I’m changing like every recognizable detail of this for privacy purposes but yall need to appreciate this

So I know how to retain CCTV footage, right? It doesn’t come up everywhere but I know my way around- and if someone gets jumped in a parking lot or whatever I can go backwards and see whodunnit

So I’m at this one place, right? And I get a call that an older woman in a wheelchair got hurt somehow and we need to see what happened.

Nobody remembers the exact time, because of course not, but they tell me she was wearing like a massive hot pink jacket and she’s in a wheelchair and she left with a medic round 09:45ish, so I figure I’ll start there.

So I find the incident itself no problem, but they need ALL footage for liability and insurance and stuff, so I have to keep going

And about ten minutes backwards, I lose her. She comes into view past a single shelf on one of the worse cameras and vanishes.

like. VANISHES. Hot pink jacket, big bulky black chair, gonzo. No idea where she came from.

So, I pull up entry cams. Zoom backwards till I see her come in… at like 06:15.

THREE AND A HALF HOURS EARLIER.

So first off, this is gonna take me like two hours minimum to write down, forget retention. And I’m kind of dying in my soul a bit but I start over there, watching her come in and meander and whatever.

At about 08:30ish she disappears.

Doesn’t leave. Doesn’t head to a bathroom. Doesn’t take her coat off. Her trail just stops.

Now, I’ve done this before. Typically, a location only has the mandatory minimum amount of room for a chair or walker to get around, so a person using one can only go forwards and it’s hard to 180. That limits options and makes it easier to follow, whereas a little unattended and fully mobile kid will zoom around in circles and shit and go who the hell knows where.

Then I see her again on the other ass end of the building, and I have to go back again to see how she GOT there.

My guys.

Her two and three-point turns are INCREDIBLE.

She’s popping on the wheels, flip, zoom, she’s out somewhere I didn’t think she could even GET to. I’ve been planning my search for places that fit a wheelchair or least-resistance fast-paths from A to B and she’s like… doing some Tokyo Drift shit.

I don’t know WHY. The whole place is basically completely accessible so long as you put up with having to reverse, but no. No, she goes where she wants.

I’ve been at this for half the day, and I still have no idea where she went for like an hour and a half.

Fuck me, I’m taking a lunch break

This is barely an exaggeration

What Strength Really Means 💪

✅️ Vetted by @gazavetters {537}✅️

Hey everyone, my name is Abdelmajed. I don’t usually talk much about myself, but today, I want to share a little piece of my story.

I was born and raised in Gaza, a place that has always been my home 🏡. I grew up surrounded by my family, my friends, and the streets that I knew like the back of my hand. Life wasn’t always easy, but we had love, laughter, and dreams. I used to think that no matter what happened, home would always be here. But life has a way of changing things in ways we never expect.

Over the past months, everything I once knew has disappeared. The streets that were once filled with children playing are now silent. The houses that held so many memories are now just rubble. And the people I loved—some of them are gone forever. 💔

✅️ Vetted by @gazavetters {537}✅️

This is what our children eat

This is what our children are facing, either death by hunger or bombing.

Save us from this damn war please, we beg you

Help us feed our children or leave this hell

We dream of a decent life and a more secure future, but this dream needs a step from you. Help us travel and build a new life

✅️Vetted by @gazavetters , my number verified on the list is ( #533 )✅️

✅️ Vetted by @bilal-salah0 ✅️

To donate

Can you donate $20, $30, or $60 to help us provide essential support? Every little bit helps

so PLEASE I ask your kind hearts to help meby DONATING or SHARING as much as u can💔🙏🙏

Your little brother

“Why would you want to make a game for the original Nintendo?? No one is going to buy that”

Jokes on you! I sold 1 copy!!!

LOOK AT THAT BEAUTIFUL GRAPH! THATS A SALE BAAAABY

^Me rn

Holy shit yall. I just woke up to 21 sales! The game has officially recouped the cost of all the software I used to make it!!! IM PROFITABLE?!

...What's the game, how did you make it, and how are you selling it?

It’s called Undercover Shot! It’s a 2 player social deduction game for the original Nintendo Entertainment System!

I’m taking pre orders for physical copies here https://www.homebrew-factory.com/home/138-undercover-shot.html

And selling digital ROM versions for a dollar here: https://pirateprincessjess.itch.io/undercover-shot-nes

A week ago I was losing my mind over 1 sale, now I’ve sold 81 digital copies and 52 physical ones.

Over 100 people bought my game!!!!????? This is mind blowing. I don’t even know how to process this. I am so grateful. I would not have sold nearly this many without yall sharing this post as much as you did. I love you all so much. Thank you for making this happen. You all made my childhood dream come true in a bigger way than I thought possible.

Achievement Unlocked:

NEStseller

Sell a new title for the fucking Nintendo Family Computer in the year 2025 AD.

Wait, why am I so excited about getting a pointless achievement? I’m actually so stoked about this

Oh wait I get it now! “NESt seller”! Like “best seller” it’s a pun!

It took me 18 hours to get this joke, but I got there in the end.

it’s crazy how accessible waterboarding is. like, you can do it to yourself whenever you want and you don’t even have to go out and buy anything.

Hay now, that’s how I-I get these locks of luscious emerald, the rock’n roll lifestyle ain’t for everyone mama

somehow, even after nearly twenty years of this damned website, they’re still coming up with new ideas

yeah no i think the whole "they could kill you but they choose not to" is a pretty important part of the monsterfuckery

yeah that big spiky creature could rip your head off in her teeth with basically zero effort, or kill you any of about two dozen other ways with even less effort, but you're warm and you smell nice so she just curls up in your bed (and takes up the whole thing bc she's like three times your size) and wraps her powerful forelimbs around your body and chitters in your ear

It's called hard sci-fi because it's not as easy

I thought it'd be fun if I made aliens that respirate CO² into O² like plants but I started thinking about how I'm not actually sure how exactly those chemical processes work and now I'm on the wikipedia page for nicotinamide adenine dinucleotide phosphate

I feel like the media literacy ogre for biochemistry

Love some miserable Elon in the morning

normally stuff like this feels performative because anyone can talk shit online to someone and most normal people would just ignore it and block you but in this instance its the funniest thing in the world because you know for a fact its getting to him

even the bloated miller wants him dead