I have no pity to spare for thee...

Look I love unconditional devotion love stories as much as the next person, but there's really something so deliciously raw about conditional devotion.

I have served you and I have loved you for decades, but I will not give up my principles for you. You cut out part of my heart and took it with you down that path that you insist on walking, but you walk it alone. Even when the bleeding, gaping hole you left in my chest kills me, I will not follow you.

cherishing each other's true forms

bonus orb husbands:

My "Six weeks until we hear from our good friend Jonathan Harker" post went somewhat viral.

I've had several folks in my ask box and in replies inquire how they can be part of the "experience the novel DRACULA in real time" phenomenon this year.

So here's one of the replies I just sent.

There's two ways to follow along.

If you want to read along, you can subscribe to the Substack and get the entries in your email. https://draculadaily.substack.com/

If you want to listen to the ABSOLUTELY BANGER full cast audio drama [with transcripts], you can access it with your favorite listening platform via https://redracula.live/.

You can also get lots of thoughtful analysis and fanart by tracking the Tumblr tags #dracula daily and #re: dracula.

Hope this helps!

Disclaimer: I am not affilated with either DRACULA DAILY or with Re: Dracula. I'm just a humble bookseller, just another fan, enjoying this annual Tumblr tradition.

hey guys, so i saw this photo of edwin and it means that i get to talk about historical fashion.

ok i dunno if you can see very well, but ya know how at the top of his shirt theres a little gold thing. that isnt a top button. its a collar stud (or at least i think thats what theyre called)

in the 1910s and maybe the 1920s, shirts were a little bit different. for the most part it looks the same way a modern shirt would. however, when you buy it, theres no collar.

it simply just ends with a bit of fabric with two holes in it. then you would buy a collar seperately and attatch it on with some kind of stud, in this picture you can kind of see where the two ends have been overlapped to attatch it

heres a closer look at his collar ^

also you cant actually see it in pretty much any of the scenes because his bowtie is covering the overlap and the stud, this is the first picture ive found where you can clearly see whats going on

heres an example of a shirt without the collar, i dont know who's photo this is but if i find out or if anyone can tell me i'll change this to credit them.

even in the scene where he has his top button undone, if you look closely the collar is just tucked into the top of the shirt.(im struggling to find a photo, i’ll come back when i have)

for @idliketobeatree, and using her gorgeous payneland week art 💜

please go give lots of love to Marcela's beautiful art here!

I’m at a sociology conference and just attended a memorial for one of the giants of our field, and one of the panelists told this story…he was at a meeting with this guy, who he got his PhD under and had a long standing relationship with, and he was bemoaning the current state of the world, and he asked this old professor, “how can you be so optimistic? I can’t ever be anything but a pessimist.”

and the old professor said, “you little fucker, I’m going to make a statement and then I’m going to take you out to the parking lot and beat your ass. What good does your pessimism do?”

and that really struck me. not the least because I also knew this old professor and he very rarely swore, so I know this was something he was really worked up about. what good does your pessimism do? What GOOD does your pessimism DO. I’ll be thinking about that for awhile.

- Lois McMaster Bujold, Borders of Infinity (1989)

"It helps me be prepared!"

As a recovered pessimist raised by a horrendously toxic pessimist: No, it doesn't.

Foresight and practicality are completely separate qualities that can exist without pessimism. You can acknowledge the worst that might happen and prepare for it without having a completely negative worldview.

And pessimism can absolutely exist without those qualities. Which is a miserable way to live.

There actually is academic work that point out how cynicism can make you more gullible, and how fascists take advantage of it. The Jewish German political scientist and philosopher Hannah Arendt wrote about it in Origins of Totalitarianism (1951). I wanted to include this passage, even though it's long, because incredibly important. And true.

"In an ever-changing, incomprehensible world the masses had reached the point where they would, at the same time, believe everything and nothing, think that everything was possible and nothing was true. The mixture in itself was remarkable enough, because it spelled the end of the illusion that gullibility was a weakness of unsuspecting primitive souls and cynicism the vice of superior and refined minds. Mass propaganda discovered that its audience was ready at all times to believe the worst, no matter how absurd, and did not particularly object to being deceived because it held every statement to be a lie anyhow. The totalitarian mass leaders based their propaganda on the correct psychological assumption that, under such conditions, one could make people believe the most fantastic statements one day, and trust that if the next day they were given irrefutable proof of their falsehood, they would take refuge in cynicism; instead of deserting the leaders who had lied to them, they would protest that they had known all along that the statement was a lie and would admire the leader for their superior tactical clearness.

This leader is spared from ever having to be accountable to his own statements. Naïve are those who thought then (or believe now) that such a leader would be brought down by his lies, or made to adhere to his promises. ‘The totalitarian system, unfortunately, is fool-proof against such normal consequences; its ingeniousness rests precisely on the elimination of that reality which either unmasks the liar or forces him to live up to his pretence’. In yesterday’s totalitarianism and in today’s totality, the fake dominates. Gullibility embraces the fake, and cynicism embraces gullibility. The totality is immune from truth because the very idea of truth is dissolved within it."

the self-indulgent fanfiction will continue until morale improves

Can't get over that bit right after Jin Zixuan dies, when they're back in the Burial Mounds and Wei Wuxian is losing his shit about how everything is ruined, and he says, what am I supposed to do now?

And the narration stops to describe him hearing himself say that, and knowing just how bad that proves the situation is.

Because he's not supposed to be the one who says that. Other people say that to him. And he answers them, always. That's how this works.

That's just such a fantastic bit of characterization. I think it might be the clearest statement we ever get about how Wei Wuxian identifies, as a person.

He identifies as someone who can fix it. When there's a difficult situation that's stumping other people. That's what 'attempting the impossible' really is, for him. If he can resolve the trouble by being strong or charming or shameless, that's fine. If he can solve it by being terribly clever, that's excellent. If he has to solve it by figuring out what body part to sacrifice or what crime to commit, well then that's how it has to be.

But if he can't solve it, then he doesn't know who he is anymore.

This is so cool

Edwin Payne & Charles Rowland | Dead Boy Detectives 1.05

“Snowshill Manor”

Ink and watercolour illustration for chapter 1 of my new Payneland fic The Great Lambada Craze of ’89 (and ’24). The fic is a direct sequel to Octopus Pillow.

God if I think about Edwin Payne too much I lose my mind. No one saved him. No one reached out a hand. He had to save himself. He escaped hell with only his own two hands to carry him there. And what does he do with his freedom? He reaches out a hand to Charles. He reaches out a hand to every ghost he can help. He could have been bitter. He could have said No one’s coming to save you. Save yourself. Instead, he says, you’ll escape, and you won’t do it alone.

worlds slowest fanfic author tries really really hard

everyone in the notes we are all holding hands. everyone who hasnt worked on a wip in weeks or months or years, its okay. we are going slow but we are going

post 2 of 2 (1)

Last time I wondered if Danish vagabonds, also known as Landevejsriddere (country road knights), live by some sort of code because even though they’re usually drunk they’re always very pleasant and friendly and as it turns out, yes they do. LINK

You can’t just put on a festive hat and push a pram with your earthly belongings and call yourself a vagabond in this country. You have to be mentored by an older vagabond and travel along the vagabond routes for two summers and one winter before you get your vagabond name at an annual ceremony at Hjallerup Marked where all new vagabonds are ”baptized”.

They also have an annual ceremony at Egeskov Marked where they vote on who should be their king for a year and help settle conflicts in vagabond society. They give the title to the vagabond who has been the kindest and best behaved all year.

The vagabonds have rules they live by: no lying, no stealing, no fighting and always be polite. If they catch any of their members breaking the rules they beat them up because it’s important to their survival that outsiders can trust them.

That’s why if you see a vagabond you know you’re in safe company no matter how drunk they are. Should you come across one support an old tradition full of rituals and kindness by giving them some coins or a sandwich.