• jen. she/her. minor. gemini. bi and asexual.
• not normal abt my interests
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• she was the kid who told everyone santa claus wasn't real and got weirded out when one her friends (at the time) started crying.
• ate a worm on a bet worth a dime.
• her brother would jump around with hobbies and sports and brooke would always pick them up after him and excel at them but by that time he'd have found a new thing and their parent's attention would go back to him.
• her gpa is probably like 0.5, not because she's dumb but because she hates school so she has her essay titles as stuff like for my bitchass teacher and never does homework.
• constantly in detention. has a permanently assigned seat in the room because of how often she's in there.
• laughs when she doesn't know what to say it's uncomfortable/unsettling for a lot of people. mainly because she has an evil villain laugh.
• almost stabbed a kid with a pencil for tearing her paper up. she was stopped in time by the teacher.
• surprisingly she's never been to jail but all the town cops know her and what she's like so they're always itching to get her behind bars for something. they can never catch her.
• brooke is literally never home. during the day she's at school if she feels like it and at night she's roaming the streets. her parents don't notice.
• caspian tore apart her favorite ragdoll that she'd made. she tried to push him off their home's balcony.
• she wears a lot of feminine-style clothing because it's all her mother buys her.
• she found a stray cat and decided to feed it. she named it rust and took care of him until one day she never saw him again.
• has a pocket knife that's always on her person. it's engraved with CR because she stole it from her brother.

• she moves to an apartment in boston and works as a physical therapist.
• her neighbors think she's nice just a little rough around the edges and she knows this. she keeps it that way because she's grown adjusted to her "quaint" life.
• to get her anger out she does boxing and running.
• brooke often hallucinates her younger self doing things she wouldn't do now. for example if someone cuts past her in a line she sees her younger self jumping forward to attack them.
• it makes the lines between what she's done and what she could do blur badly.
• she visits her brother's grave when her anger starts getting really bad and vandalizes it somehow. normally she'll carve something into the headstone or give it a few kicks/punches. if there are flowers there, she rips them up and scatters them on a grave with her name on it.
• she still dresses mostly feminine.
• she makes up a new story every time a curious kid asks about how she lost her fingers. ("i fought a tiger and won." "i didn't eat enough vegetables." "i ate it.")
• she has a jar of candy on her dining room table as her centerpiece full of her favorite candies. she rarely likes candy though so they sit there a while.
• she has shit all over her apartment, nothing's organized. it's just a miscellaneous collection of her favorite records, books, movies, trinkets, and anything else she likes.
• it's her way of saying this is her home. she finally has something that belongs to her.
• she only ever has nightmares about her brother's death. in those nightmares she's always her younger self.

the leopard. the killer. the brutal one.

early childhood

• brooke was born into a world where her brother existed before her. it would be the only world she would ever know. to say her brother (caspian) was favored would be the understatement of the century. her parents fell over themselves for their son. their entire reason for having brooke was so caspian would have a brother to play and grow up with. that didn't happen and she carries the weight of thinking if she was a son, her life might be better.
• because of having second place to him in everything, she attaches herself obsessively to whoever shows her unwavering care. it first appeared in third grade. her teacher was patient and kind, always helping her just enough so she could figure out the rest of the problem on her own. when her mother tried to pick her up from school, she started crying and screaming because she wanted to stay with her teacher.
• after that, it was her best friend in fourth grade. after her friend became uncomfortable, it was her middle school librarian.
• she's never learned how to be quiet. if she wants her voice to be heard, she has to scream. if her brother wants to be heard, all he has to do is mumble.
• this jealousy is unknown to caspian. he's always just thought she was an angry little sister and teases her relentlessly until she's snapping at him.
• her parents will always take his side when this happens.

pre-crash high school

• freshman year, she starts getting into fights. it's stupid, honestly. all it does is get her into trouble and make her brother an embarrassed senior with the insane freshman sister. but it feels...good. it feels good to let her anger out.
• brooke spends so much time in the nurses' office that she has her section of bandages in the cabinet. the nurse, sick of cleaning up her messes and pulled muscles, starts teaching her about physical health and how to do minor wound treatment for her aching muscles.
• the nurse is a little surprised at how well she's doing with it and recommends her to the athletic trainer, saying she'd make a good assistant or intern. that's how brooke finds herself watching games, passing out waters, and teaching stretches to the basketball team, soccer team, and football team.
• sophomore year she's doing the same but she's beginning to make a name for herself. people know her as the girl an inch from snapping. people are learning to steer clear from her. steer clear from the girl who has nearing a hundred detentions, the girl who always seems to have a black eye, the girl who grins crookedly when she feels the other person hit first.
• she's not lumped in with the burnouts, no. she's something everyone avoids. she's not a harmless stoner, she's cold and calculated.
• it disappoints her, in a way. now that she doesn't have people taunting her, baiting her into fights. she misses the feeling of letting her rage out.
• junior year, she's considered another athletic trainer with how much she's helped. sometimes, when the actual trainer isn't there, she gets called for games and practices with complete trust.
• nationals is a different story though. when the trainer tells her about a conflict that may result in brooke going in as the athletic trainer she starts to have a few doubts. maybe she can handle a few hours by herself but for an entire trip? she's not that qualified.
• but her trainer and the nurse assure her she's well suited for the trip and that they wouldn't trust anyone else. it makes her feel important.
• one look at all the trophies her brothers' won for the teams makes the decision for her.
• she's going to nationals with the yellowjackets.

the wilderness

• she feels blood when she opens her eyes. it's all over the seat, dripping onto her hands too. she can't tell if it's hers or not. she can't tell.

• listens to mazzy star, abba, the cranberries, a-ha, the cure, and fleetwood mac.
• listens to elvis presley when she's thinking of her mom because she would sing his songs when she was baking.
• germaphobe and has undiagnosed dyslexia. in the wilderness she faints when misty amputates coach ben's leg. she packed hand sanitizer for the trip and it's gone within three days (she freaks the hell out).
• silly little girl who's a giant people pleaser. she's a great listener though.
• she knows asl because her maternal grandfather was deaf so her mother taught her.
• her mother was going to name her lysander if she was a boy because she's a shakespeare addict.
• she remembers details about everyone on the team. she knows their birthdays, their middle names, and what they like for lunch.
• terrified of caterpillars. she doesn't mind butterflies but caterpillars give her chills and she makes someone get rid of them if they're too close.
• she lives in a big house with lots of windows but her favorite spot is the tree house her father built for her half brothers (they never use it).
• out of all her half siblings her younger sister (molly) is the nicest to her because she doesn't see the reason behind being mean to her yet.
• knows randy has a crush on her but plays dumb since she doesn't want him to ask her out.
• if she was modern day she would've loved hozier's do i wanna know? cover, the barbie movie, and arcane (she would've had a crisis seeing ekko and jinx).
• reads her mother's annotated copy of romeo and juliet every year on the anniversary of her death.
• when she was little she wanted curly hair so bad she wished for it on her birthday candles for three years.
• she can't sleep without hugging a pillow. in the wilderness there aren't any to spare so she just doesn't sleep for the first few nights until natalie gives her jacket up. (eventually her jacket gets replaced with her but shhh)
• obsessed with random facts, especially about animals. when she's nervous she'll start talking about the things she's learned recently.
• favorite animal is an otter!! she wants to get a tattoo of one on her right ankle after she graduates high school and moves out.
• her worst fear is dying alone.
• she has a sticker collection that sits on her dresser because she's scared to "waste" them.
• she hates science and math but loves art and history.
• goes to record shops all the time with taissa and ends up buying nothing because she and tai never have the budget.
• the top middle picture in her intro post is kinda what her senior yearbook photo looks like.
• has chronic nightmare disorder (in the wilderness it actually gets better because when she wakes up she has people around there instead of her waking up alone in her room in her house).
• she's been planning on becoming a vet for exotic animals since she was eight and that dream has never changed.

the dove. the peacekeeper. the olive branch.

early childhood

• she and her mother were practically attached at the hip, doing everything together. her mother (helene) was gentle. she always had a sweet smile when she looked down at julie, no matter what. she taught her to cook, bake, sew, paint, whittle, and basically everything she knows how to do now she learned from her mother.
• julie was home schooled until she was ten, when her mother committed because of her father's abusive behavior. she never noticed how bad it was since her mother shielded her from it until it was directed at her, her father having no one else to take his anger out on.
• he remarried quickly, mere months afterwards, to a snobby rich woman who immediately joined in on the abuse but taking a verbal tactic. her father, who brushed off the death of helene faster than julie was sent to public school, had two new children by the anniversary of her death (twin boys).
• school was where julie felt safest, strangely enough. she was extremely well-liked, one of those cliche popular girls but with a certain softness that drew people from every crowd in. she wasn't top of her class or anything but she got reasonably good grades and managed to charm even her strictest teachers.

pre-crash high school

• freshman year and she already has another sibling, a sister this time. since her father and step-mother are usually having a smoke session at some bar until midnight, she's juggling school and having to parent her three younger half siblings. none of them like her and make her job as difficult as possible every day.
• but she does have luck in the friend department...for the most part. taissa seems to like her, jeff acknowledges her existence occasionally, randy likes her a little too much, but jackie is her saving grace. julie and jackie aren't best friends, sure. but they depend on each other for surviving boring english classes and they've bonded enough on that.
• sophomore year is tougher. much tougher. her step-mother quit her job to become a stay at home mom (really so she just doesn't have to work) and makes a habit of commenting on the portions of dinner julie takes, if she has seconds, or if she's starting to "fill out" in one of her favorite outfits.
• julie lets it get to her head and starts skipping breakfast and sneaking onto her step-mother's scale every night. soon breakfast turns into breakfast and lunch and every night turns into every morning, afternoon, and night.
• her anorexia goes unnoticed for the rest of high school.
• junior year, jackie wants to try out for the soccer team. she's already convinced shauna to join but she wants another friend to tag along and julie, thinking it'll be good for her step-mother to see her active, joins without thinking.
• at the beginning of the season, she starts with a basic set of skills that she can barely complete. at the end, she's offered a front-row ticket to varsity next year along with jackie and shauna.
• senior year is one of her worst years. her eating has gotten worse and worse. soccer drills tire her to the bone and even the thought of her schoolwork is overwhelming.
• the pep rally is absolute torture. the lights are too bright, everything's too loud...she can barely make it back to the bathroom before she passes out. the glances she gets from the guys on the bleachers and the girls on the team go unnoticed as everything goes dark.
• the morning of nationals starts by her scrubbing the tears off her half sister before her step-mother can accuse her of being the cause. exhausted, she barely manages to pack everything before running out the front door where taissa's impatiently waiting in her car.
• the plane is much calmer. and private! julie can barely remember the meaning of that word. she moves to sit next to taissa or jackie but van and shauna beat her to it. it's a little nerve-wracking. she's never had to flounder around for a seat and just when she's about to go for the lone seat in the back, natalie grasps her wrist.
• "i've got room."
• julie doesn't dwell on the hopeful look in natalie's eyes, instead giving her an easy smile and sliding into the seat next to her.
• the altitude sways her to sleep, the last thing she sees is natalie's leather jacket before she's dead to the world.

the wilderness

• there's screaming. everywhere. she feels someone tugging on her arm but she's not moving and she lets out a yelp of horror when she feels something dig into her thigh. oh god...it's her seat belt's buckle. julie wants to throw up.
• "come on!" a voice, rough, frantic, and vaguely familiar urges her to move. "i've got you, just lean on me."
• and julie's so exhausted so she leans on the source of the voice, the smell of smoke and burning plastic filling her nose.