Ghost

creating a new OC. He's a doctor who treats weird kink furries. his bit is that every patient who comes into his office he has to figure out how to complete the checkup while working around some weird toon-logic contrivance. He's like the doctor house of kink because he's the only one in his field capable of getting results. He's massively overworked and he's been IP banned from the e621 forums.

His name is Doctor RJ Yiphman and he's one wrong move away from getting fired.

Doctor Yiphman treats more patients

My humble additions. Big fan of your work @meow-moment

wait whats the last fetish? giant ice cream balls?

Mundane America. Broken pole with rope and an American Flag. Cincinnati, Ohio.

Wait.  Wait.

Wait.

I know that telephone pole.

I know that telephone pole intimately because I’m the one who broke it.

Thats the pole next to Sycamore Jr. High, in between the jr high school and Pipkins, where I had my second car accident.  A woman t-boned my car and drove me into that pole in 2008 and it took them years to actually take it down.

That black metal pole you see just beyond the broken phone pole is a “Now Leaving/Welcome To Blue Ash, Ohio” sign, visible at 5520 Cooper Road on google maps.

(the flag is there, btw, because its the starting point for the Blue Ash/Montgomery July 4th parade.)

The internet is so staggeringly immense that I can’t help but be disproportionately delighted when things like this happen.

to be, or not to be (romanticization of the inevitable)

i love when people are like “Oh my god, I couldn’t possibly imagine being asexual, how sad, you’re missing so much…” Bitch!!! You know what’s sad? Being gluten intolerant. If you placed two pills in front of me right now, one which would turn me allosexual and one which would enable me to tear into a freshly-baked oven-warm olive-and-rosemary ciabatta without utterly destroying my body, it would not even be a choice. “hyuhhh-duhhhh aren’t you worried you’ll die alone” aren’t you worried i’ll just launch myself over the bakery counter in our local grocery store one day and stuff croissants in my mouth like a starving racoon til i die and the whole place has to be closed down as a health risk while they peel my bloated body off the linoleum floor? You should be

What i have learned from the tags of this post is that there is a whole community of gluten intolerant asexuals and we are all DESPERATELY horny for bread

Do you think it worked

Lmao so I just had the weirdest art commission process I've ever experienced. All I did was ask them, on the platform where I encountered their art, if they did commissions. They said yes, asked for details and reference photos bc it's that kind of art. I talked to them a bit, sent them some pictures, expecting them to... like... come back to me with payment info?

But they just started working on it. By the time I realized they were doing this, they'd already started - and this is a PHYSICAL ART PIECE, SOMETHING THAT USES ACTUAL MATERIALS, SOMETHING THEY WOULD HAVE TO SHIP TO ME.

Just got photos of the final outcome, it's beautiful and reasonably priced and we're paying for it, but like... man there are some steps in between someone asking "hey do you do commissions, here's what I'd want from you" and actually making the art, namely... ANY DISCUSSION OF PAYMENT.

In the artist's defense, I get the sense their first language might not be English, and their art is good and well-priced enough I'll probably commission them again one day, but boy that commission process could've come with a little less "oh shit you're doing it already? but what do you even want as payment...?"

It's not terribly uncommon. I've worked with artists in the past where the turnaround on the actual work has been fantastic, but I've had to chase after them for months to get them to actually issue an invoice – and, like, these weren't even personal commissions. This was stuff that was going to appear in a published book. Some artists just have far more enthusiasm for doing art than for getting paid, apparently!

(Then sometimes when I do get the invoice and we start discussing payment methods, it's like: okay, so you don't have an account with Paypal or any equivalent service, and your bank doesn't accept wire transfers or cash foreign cheques, so I guess I'll... have an international money order made out in your local currency and physically mail it to your house? Would that work? For clarity, I'm not vagueing a specific artist – this has legitimately happened multiple times.)

this is my first time posting here, I don't have any idea how Tumblr works.

are you telling me you were hard while boiling this egg?

what if we locked in…together

Steven Universe ended on a great note, but now I just really want a spinoff series about Steven travelling across America and inflicting his own brand of weirdness on people

“So this guy walks into the diner. I say ‘guy’ because I had no idea how old he was, he was either a very tall child or a babyfaced grandpa. He’s wearing a bright pink varsity jacket and flip-flops, and when he’s done breakfast he gives me a fifty-dollar tip on a five dollar breakfast. So now I’m thinking, ‘Oh, I gotta know more about this guy,’ and I ask him what he does for work.

“And this guy looks at me, and he looks like the oldest man in the world, and he says, and I quote, ‘I used to run a school but I retired because the stress was killing me,’ and walks out. I think about him maybe once a week.”

“I really love being a creator sometimes. Last week I was at a local con, selling enamel pins and this teenager - I think he was a teen, but he looked like a giant toddler - comes over in his gaudy-as-heck pink jacket. Face is fresh as morning dew but he’s got a real tired look in his eyes, until he sees somehing out the corner of his eye that makes him light up. Like I swear you could see stars in his eyes. Things is, I used to be big into a silly show called Crying Breakfast Friends and still had some pins left in the grab box. Never sold a lot of them cause the show was old by now and those were some early pins I made so they were not the best, but he goes absolutely feral over them so I say he can have them for cheap. He’s about to pay when he sees my other pins and their prices and insists to pay full price. I’m taken aback and for some reason try to argue, but he says “Look, you are not my moms, you can’t survive on love and light alone”. I sorta didn’t process that, but was more focused on stopping that boy from overspending on some crappy pins cause he seemed real nice and then he just follows it up with “I get it. You don’t think they are as good as the other ones, but you put the same work into them as the others. They are an important part of how your art became yours and that’s why they are some of the most important pins you ever made”. This kid nearly made me choke up and I gave up argueing against getting more money.

So we start talking about CBF. It felt real good to talk about something that you thought only you cared about with someobdy else and we really got along. And the kid used to be a superfan, used to make reaction videos and fanart and roleplayed with his breakfast, even made breakfast OCs. The last thing he didn’t really want to talk about, because he got real quiet all of sudden. How can breakfast hurt you that bad? But I managed to cheer him up by saying I’m gonna make more CBF pins and would send him some. He was super grateful and told me to send it to the beach of his city. I wanted a real address but he said the postwoman there would know what it meant.

And just as he leaves he say “My therapist said I should reconnect with the things that make me happy to combat my PTSD and existential dread, so thanks, you really saved me here” boy you’re 16, ur welcome but what the hell?

UPDATE: I found his tubetube account and yeah, there’s all the reaction videos but also he apparently used to be part of SADIE KILLER AND THE SUSPECTS like he played a bit of guitar with them and documented their sessions and uploaded them AND HIS DAD WAS THE MANAGER THAT LAUNCHED THEM BECAUSE HE ASKED HIM TO DO IT wat? I have so many questions. Like did the rockstar life give him PTSD before they even got big? Does he have a dad and two moms? was his dad his mom? is this a trans thing? who is that sweet boy?

SECOND UPDATE: Apparently his dad is an underground rock legend and a millionaire cause his song appeared in a sprite commercial. I’m done. How are people real”

from the blog of a pin designer

I give up trying to draw him on-model

I demand to myself to forever draw him skrunkly

University really is about looking at the worst pdf known to man huh

the professor uploaded this sideways. I'm sparing you at least that bit

Image from the best pdf I ever saw, [Elliot 2025]:

[Elliot 2050] - The Utterly Unhinged Elamo-Minoan Hypothesis https://www.academia.edu/128559713

the shimp got too much attention and now there are transphobes in my notes, this is a transgender blog run by a transgender dyke. fuckers.

Reblog this loby when they least expect it.

Final girl