have you heard of this spray that makes you see hair on your face that is otherwise invisible so you can shave it with a dull plastic razor that comes in a 20 pack which will be on this planet for hundreds of years??? buy. have you heard of this single use sheet masks that does nothing different than a normal mask and you have to wear it overnight (it will come off) and on flights (you look crazy)??? buy. have you heard of this camera that makes you see your greasy scalp (normal) and dead skin (also normal) up close so you can purchase a treatment for hundreds of dollars and/or exfoliating scrub containing particles that are going down your drain and straight into the sea???? buy. have you heard of this special plastic gadget that

whenever people say shit like “i couldn’t be polyamorous, i’m so jealous and possessive. if my partner even LOOKS at another girl/guy i’m gonna kick them out of a window” i’m like well you should probably be working on that. like even if you don’t end up doing polyamory it’s probably good to not be like that

There’s always one 🧡

sometimes you'll look over and just see her

Artichoke by Joseph Hutchinson

just noticed a typo in one of my published smut fics where I wrote “sock” instead of “cock”. I will now go live the rest of my life in the forest where no one will ever see or hear from me again

love watching a movie and then coming on here and reblogging some gifs of what i watched like i’m making a little announcement about where i’ve been

i love girls but they’re out of my league … like every single girl… all of them.. out of my league

"if tumblr goes down find me a-" we have been making these posts for a decade now.. either i wake up one day and its gone and i take up cigaretts to fill the void or 40 years from now i post my 5G cancer xray results direct from my neuralink

My car is getting serviced and this auto shop has a shop dog and he's ridiculous. Look at this guy. This is a grown ass man.

Since there's been another "Tumblr is gonna die!" scare, let's do a poll...

Rb for larger sample size appreciated :)

My five year plan is to just see what happens

it renews every five years

does anyone want to hire me to be their evil advisor

i mean normal advisor

sometimes I wonder how y'all are obsessed with specific characters and I'm like "why them" but then I remember that sometimes its literally not your choice you just look at them wrong and all of a sudden they're taking up your every thought forever

to quote someone who was a genius on bluesky:

Some of you guys have never burned a CD and it shows

Some of you have never sat in front of the radio for hours with your finger poised over the record button on the tape deck waiting for specific songs to come on so you can make the jankiest mixed tape ever... and it shows.