LapisFucker

You can't be saying that anymore zigzagoon

girl on club dancefloor has her feet cooled by a friend pouring smirnoff ice over them (2000)

Mary Magdalene washing Christ's feet

Random event from last year that I think now may be a metaphor

(Just out of sight is the completely empty parking lot just outside the parking garage)

Had a dream that I drew this dragon and felt disappointed when I woke up that it wasn't real so I drew it all over again.

Yknow what fuck it I'm making polls

The Muscle in this context referring to a bog-standard goon, like basic-enemy-in-a-flat-cap-with-a-pipe-wrench kinda guys

scientists wont tell you this! (because it's not true)

experts don't want you to know this! (because it's made up)

doctors HATE this one trick! (because it's dangerous and unhealthy)

need a 1'3" tall gnome daddy to ruin my life

i literally dont care what your excuse for using AI is. if you didnt put your own effort into making it im not putting my own effort into interacting with it.

"buhbub uhbubuh its just a tool!!" yeah youd know about being a tool wouldnt you

maybe ask chatgpt to generate someone who gives a fuck

so fucked up that goncharov is only on poob

Tumblr is unique bc like. It's collaborative shitposting and you can't opt in or out. You can just say something about your day then an evil wizard shows up to turn your post into something humorous

Every other site is just one and done, but here a post is a welcome mat to be funnier than you

yeah or sometimes you’ll see a post that hacks into your brain and forever rewrites your instinctual reaction to seeing a pineapple explode

ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ

26/26

Technically, they're only called "Rabbits" when they're still beneath the earth's crust. Once they erupt (from their burrows), the proper term is "Bunnies".

I thought Rabbits grew from the cave ceiling and Bunnies grew from the cave floor

i’m obsessed with the mum from ponyo. driving single lane on a cliff edge? drift those turns in your nissan cube. husband has to work an extra shift? tell him to fuck off in morse code. pet fish turned into a child on your driveway? adopt her. town drowned in a tsunami? leave your 5 year old in charge, he’s the man of the house now

ideal woman to me and i am not kidding

SHE SHOULD BE AT THE CLUB

I don’t think the club could handle her

Knowledge Wins - Public Library Books are Free, American Library Association (1918)