being 5'7" is so fucked. AND i'm a top. i suffer more than you could ever know.

doing shadow of the colossus shit to her pussy 🧝‍♀️

uhm.... girls only have cocks around these parts, friend

Doing shadow of the colossus shit to HIS pussy

sorry im a lesbian

doing shadow of the colossus shit to her penis?

well if youre unsure i can take over for you

collecting lizards to boost my stamina and climbing the tower to do shadow of the colossus shit to her 17th secret penis

i think the concept of the post is starting to escape us

nothing escapes from me

the thing about working as a housekeeper is that sometimes I will be called to clean a room that is in such a state that it gives me pause.

The thing about being a housekeeper at a Hospital is that it is not the things that would usually be concerning that leave me with questions.

Like if I go clean a room and it is just covered in blood, I'm not all "where did all this blood come from" that would be silly. It came from inside the patient and they were already in a hospital so they're probably mostly fine hopefully.

In fact "Inside the patient" is where most of the potentially concerning stuff I have to deal with comes from. Vomit? That's from inside the patient. Urine? Feces? Inside the patient baby. Needles full of unidentified drugs? That was supposed to go inside the patient but I guess they frogot.

But when I go to clean a hospital room and it is full of Sand... Did that come from inside the patient? I hope not. Why is there so much sand? Where did it come from? Was there some kind of terrible beach accident?

I have many questions and I'm scared of the answers.

this is such a delightful pair of tags

Patient happened to be under the effect of the pharaohs curse at the time

[Image ID: tags reading “#unsanitary #but op will fix that”. End ID.]

offer them a little treat !

@morphinemilkshake

e621 currently in the lead of the april fools joke leaderboard by having the only good april fools joke website modification ever

legitimately surprised with how decent this looks, considering i've drawn maybe three things since i was in high school

how its going

hey. don't cry. I went to Mad At You island and none of your friends were there :)

why were you at mad at me island

DEPOPULATING IT

not enough love for this line tbh

everyone’s trying to stump the akinator so i’m gonna try and see if he’ll know that i’m thinking of the little symbol on the front of his turban

come on it hasn’t even been 10 fucking seconds

GOD DAMN IT

i fucking hate this stupid piece of shit genie fuck him i hate him so fucking much

I give you guys MORE v1 in portal au cuz im obsessed

trans day of visibility wow

collect my boy titties🐇🏳️‍⚧️

yay I've been myself as a trans man for three years I love it!

i remember being scared and going "I can't be a boy and express myself how I do" I SAID FUCK THAT

I'm the happiest and euphoric I've ever been.

joker make up made me realize I was trans

tldr: I was getting make up done by nieces and felt euphoric for the first time ever and was like "wait I can be a boy and femme"

then I looked in the mirror and saw I was duped, it was joker make up. we all laughed.