AU in which Noctis decides Prompto needs a new dad since his parents suck. Unfortunately, despite being The Real Actual Prince, he is still not legally allowed to keep Prompto. Which just means he's got to find one himself!
(He's now taking interviews.)
(The Citadel lives in fear of the most motivated Prince Noctis anyone has ever seen)
Noctis: so, dad
Noctis: what are your feelings on adoption?
Regis:
Regis: is this about me not letting you adopt Prompto...? I told you it doesn't work like that.
Noctis, narrowing his eyes and pulling out a clipboard and red pen: subject seems adverse to giving the best chocobo eyed sunshine children loving homes
Regis: now hold on a minute--
Noctis: if someone--say, a bully named Trevor Fabius who lives three houses down the street from the corner store on 6th Ave--tripped someone else who happened to be your beloved, most adorable and sunshiney son in everything but flesh and blood in the middle of the street what would you do?
Nyx: this sounds very specific.
Crowe: stab them why
Libertus: I mean maybe not STAB stab them. A bit of light terror here and there.
Noctis, taking notes on his clipboard: interesting.
----
Noctis: so--
Clarus: listen, Highness, as nice as I think your friend is, I have my hands full with my actual two children already.
Noctis: drat.
---
Noctis, pulling out the puppy eyes: Iggy--
Ignis, not bothering to turn around: I am still unable to adopt people Noctis
Noctis: Gladio--?
Gladio, turning a page in his novel: yeah no me neither. Did you try Cor yet?
Noctis: he's next. but im trying to see if I can't get him to soften up to the idea first
Iggy and Gladio: ????
---
Cor:
Noctis:
Cor, handing over a large stack of adoption fliers, brochures, and paraphernalia: maybe try a little more subtly next time.
----
Prompto, beet red and hiding his face: astrals, Noctis, WHY
Prompto: I HAVE TO LOOK AT SOME OF THESE PEOPLE IN THE FACE AGAIN
Noctis: I mean that's the idea
Prompto: [incoherent screeching]