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i will endure

@noahczreny / noahczreny.tumblr.com

lizz. xxviii. she/her. isfj. ♡ confusion made a masterpiece of us #userlizz
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I like getting to be the me now watching the past me. It's almost a way of loving myself. Stroking the cheek of that girl with my understanding. Smoothing her hair in my mind's eye.

MARGO'S GOT MONEY TROUBLES by Rufi Thorpe

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"You’ve told me I’m supposed to be a married medical student on the way back from Cambodia. I’m wearing actual Chanel and two days ago had my labia waxed by a woman with hands bigger than yours. My fake husband just dropped a ring box onto the console between us and said, ‘There you go.’ And you want me to be serious?"

THE PARADISE PROBLEM by Christina Lauren

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sickening that jeremy thinks about changing his last name. sickening that they gave jabberwocky the moreau surname. there will be three j. moreaus. jean can build a caring family under the moreau name in elodie’s memory.

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jemmasimons-deactivated20191106

The other 10% of the time, Neil is still important enough to keep around, and Andrew will deal with his idiocy as long as he has to. 9% of the time he thinks killing Neil might be the one thing he can’t come back from, the one thing it might hurt to lose. 7~8% of the time it feels like falling, and to a man afraid of heights it is a terrible and frightening sensation. The more he falls for Neil the more he hates Neil, because Neil is the one thing in the world that could destroy him, and Andrew isn’t ready for that. He just doesn’t realize yet he’s too late to stop it. insp.

the thing about neil and jean is that i very much feel like their relationship is mirrored in andrew & aaron's relationship. the 'misplaced forever partner' vs. 'the brother who was given away.'

the way neil was abused but he was KEPT, he had a mother who gave her life to fight for him vs. jean who was sold and forgotten and abandoned, stripped of his own name and his language, who had to survive riko and the master and the complicated dynamics of being perfect court but also property, who had to navigate the nest and all its horrors and hierarchy completely alone.

aaron who was abused, who was beaten and strung along and neglected, but who his mother came back for vs. andrew who was left behind, who never had a last name, who said 'please' so much at seven he can't stand the sound of the word at 21, who was willing to carve pieces from himself for the promise of a scrap of family.

andrew and aaron made a deal and hated each other for it. jean and neil were each others partners - your failure is my failure, your success is my success. andrew, who killed aaron's mother when he found out she was beating him, to hold up his end of the deal. jean, who held neil down to be carved, but who patched him up again after.

aaron, who killed his brother's rapist. and neil who did the same

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